No Peeking!
by xambedo
Summary: Having recently graduated University, Levy McGarden is more than excited about starting her new life in the big, scary world. That is, until she finds a hole in the wall of her new apartment. One curious glance into the room next door will change Levy's life forever. / GAJEVY AU / Rated: M for language and (skippable) sexual content.
1. Plot Holes

**Series:** Fairy Tail.  
 **Pairing** : Gajevy.  
 **AU:** Modern; Neighbours.  
 **Rating:** M - for future sexual content and language.  
 **Genre:** Romance, Comedy.  
 **Updates:** _Weekly (this is subject to change when I go back to school)_

 **Summary:** Having recently graduated University, Levy McGarden is more than excited about starting her new life in the big, scary world. That is, until she finds a hole in the wall of her new apartment. One curious glance into the room next door will change Levy's life forever.

 **A/N:** We recently had our conservatory reconstructed and my sister and I would make jokes all the time about the hole in the wall that was later used for wiring. This fic is just a playful take on that, really. I promise you that there will be nothing unethical or triggering surrounding the hole! Any and all activities will be consensual between the two!

Cover art by my beautiful Grace; AKA blanania on tumblr! :)

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Plot Holes**

* * *

 _This is me praying that this was the very first page,_ _not where the story line ends.  
_ _My thoughts will echo your name until I see you again.  
_ _These are the words I held back as I was leaving too soon;  
_ _I was enchanted to meet you._

* * *

 _Where is it?_

Peering into one of the many cardboard boxes littered throughout her apartment, Levy skimmed over essays and poor attempts at short stories before spotting the violet folder resting at the base of the box.

" _There_ you are." Bending over the flaps of the box, Levy reached in for the folder trapped under a pile of old papers. Yanking it free, she flicked it open and pulled out one of the photographs wedged inside the sleeves.

It was an image from graduation, depicting her classmates with their obscene black caps and joyfully drunken smiles. Lucy was there, grinning her beautiful grin while holding onto Levy's arm. The two of them had been inseparable since birth. It was strange to be in a place with only one bed after spending years in the same dorm room.

It was only fitting, Levy thought, that graduation be the first photograph to make it onto the walls of her new apartment. It was the end of one chapter and the beginning of another, after all.

Now all she had to do was find the perfect spot to hang it.

Though it was far from luxurious, Levy's apartment was already starting to look more and more like home. The bathroom was the only room separated by a doorway. The kitchen and living space were distinguishable solely by the change from carpet to tiling on the floor. It was for that reason that Levy had chosen to place only a bed, her books, and a pair of beanbag chairs on the carpeted area to reserve space for necessities. The kitchen would need some serious scrubbing before she cared to use it. For now, she was content leaving the majority of her things in their allocated boxes.

With a second glance through her apartment, Levy found the perfect spot for the photograph. The wall to the right of the front door didn't appear as worn as the others. It still retained the clean blush of rose paint from the previous resident's attempt at refurbishing the place.

It wasn't until she reached that wall, however, that Levy noticed her observation had been false, and tragically so. Right there in the middle of the wall was a hole no bigger than her thumb. When she stretched to her full height, Levy noticed that the hole was perfectly in line with her chest. Be it curiosity or genuine distress at finding a hole in her brand new apartment, Levy bent to press her face to the wall, closing one eye so that she could see inside the mysterious thumb-sized hole.

What she'd expected to be the wall of her neighbour's apartment was, in fact, just her neighbour. Her naked neighbour, at that. He had a curious amount of scars on his hips and a sweep of long black hair that tangled its way down the curve of his muscular back. When he rubbed a towel over his hair, Levy noticed an assortment of piercings dotting his nose and ears.

She barely had time to register that she was, in fact, staring at him through the hole in the wall. Her genuine surprise was enough to temporarily rivet her in place. It wasn't until he turned towards her, exposing his lower half and a new variety of scars, that the realisation finally struck her.

 _The hole went all the way through._

Throwing herself back in surprise, Levy clasped a hand over her mouth as the shock took her to the ground. She lay there on her back, panting into the creases of her palm. The vision of his naked body was permanently etched into her mind. She remembered it all: every scar, every piercing, every muscle. She was living next-door to some kind of delinquent.

"What the hell was that?" a voice asked from beyond the wall.

 _Oh no._

"Did you hear that, Lily?"

 _Oh no, no, no._

She could hear him through the wall.

Stealing a quick breath, Levy leapt to her feet and threw herself onto a beanbag chair. Wisps of blue hair fell over her eyes as she curled up in a fetal position, hoping to melt through the material and out of sight.

"Oi, Shrimp, was that you makin' that racket?"

Levy blanched.

 _No,_ no, that was impossible. There's no way he could possibly be talking to–

"Little girl, I know you're there. I can see–"

Levy let out a shriek, stood on the spot she'd been sitting, and pressed herself back against the wall, soles of her feet sinking into the beanbag beneath her. One look at the hole told her that he was there. She could practically see him through the thin wall.

"T-there's a hole," she squeaked. "I-I didn't–"

"Yeah, I know there's a hole. Been livin' here for two years, ya know."

Levy's heart leapt up into her throat. "The hole has been there for two years?!"

"Yeah, well, my old neighbour wasn't very observant so it never got fixed."

"Why didn't _you_ fix it?" she countered.

"Hey, do you have a bowl in there?" he asked, deftly avoiding her question.

Levy skimmed the valley of boxes until she found one labelled _KITCHEN UTENSILS_ in thick, red marker. "I, uh, I think so."

"Bring it over," he told her.

"But I–"

"Just hurry!"

Levy listened to him shuffle away from the wall. His feet dragged across the ground whenever he walked, making it easy to tell where he stood in proximity to the hole.

She'd store that knowledge for later.

Grabbing the first bowl she could find, Levy headed, albeit reluctantly, out into the lobby of the third floor. She didn't have to go through the anxiety-inducing process of knocking on his door because a heartbeat later she was being dragged into his apartment by a trembling wrist. She noticed, when the room stopped spinning, that he'd thrown on a pair of pants to greet her.

Well, she had to give him credit where credit was due.

Levy could hardly believe the size of him now that he stood before her. He was a muscular man, more-so up close, with fierce red eyes that seemed to scorch right through her. He appraised her with a cool expression, pierced brows lifting when he noticed the bowl in her trembling hands. She fixed her eyes on the floral blue pattern and instantly regretted her choice. Her neighbour, on the other hand, seemed somehow elated with her decision.

"You brought it!" he exclaimed.

"Y-you said to bring a bowl," she managed, not quite able to shake the cold dread shimmering through her veins. "I just grabbed the first one I saw..."

He snatched the bowl from her hands and went running off to slide it across the kitchen counter. The sorry excuse for a kitchen seemed even tinier with him stood in it, if that were at all possible. She couldn't help but notice how clean the area was. Spotless, in fact. Somehow, she'd been expecting the opposite.

Levy took the opportunity to get a good look at his apartment while he filled the bowl. The set up was virtually the same, except he had a lot of random tools and other such hazards littered across the floor. Once or twice she found herself stepping over screws and other dangerous objects to make her way through the room. Her neighbour seemed to move over them fluidly, as though each screw, each bolt, had been placed there strategically.

He took the bowl, now filled with milk, and set it down in the middle of the mess before sinking into the worn couch behind him. The couch, she noticed, was positioned directly across from the hole in the wall. Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, Levy fingered the ends of her dress and watched quietly as he leaned forward in his seat. It was then a small shadow leapt out across the floor, scampering over the screws and the bolts and the mess until it reached the bowl in the centre of the room.

It was a cat.

The bowl of milk was for a cat. This big brute of a man with his dark scowl and cocky attitude and fiery red eyes had dragged her over to his apartment...so that he could feed his tiny cat. Levy felt somehow ashamed of her quick judgement earlier. She'd taken one look at his piercings and just assumed he was a bad person.

She should've known better than to judge a book by its cover.

"How cute," she said, crouching to get a better look at the small, black kitten. "Is he yours?"

"Ain't mine," he said, waving an arm as he watched the cat drink up his milk. "Found him outside. Searched for three weeks but never found an owner, so I'm takin' care of him for now. Didn't want the poor guy thinkin' he'd been abandoned. His name's Lily according to the tag on his collar. Pantherlily, that is." The gruff man turned his eyes on Levy. "You can pet him ya know, he won't bite."

It wasn't _Lily's_ bite that she was worried about.

Rocking on the balls of her feet, Levy caressed the back of Lily's head. He stopped drinking his milk to arch his back against the flat of her hand as she combed her fingers through his soft, black fur.

"It's a good thing you were around, Shrimp."

Levy rose to her full height and crossed her arms over her chest. " _Levy._ "

"What?"

"My name," she said with a sigh. "It's Levy."

"Good for you," he chuckled. " _Gajeel._ It's nice to meet ya, Neighbour."

Levy took a quick glance at Lily's empty bowl when she felt him rub up against her leg. "What have you been putting his food in for the last three weeks?"

"Well, I used to have a bowl of my own but I, uh, had a bit of an accident," Gajeel said, gesturing to the pile of broken glass in the corner of the room. "As it turns out, booze and cooking don't mix."

Levy stifled a laugh. "So you're the kind of person who likes to party?"

Gajeel relaxed his posture to spread his arms along the back of the couch. His brows pulled together as if recalling something he'd rather forget. "Not really."

"So, um..." Levy flicked her gaze down to the hole in the wall. "What're we going to do about that?"

Gajeel tipped his head back in an almost defiant manner. "Nothing."

"What?! We can't just leave it, what about–"

"You don't _have_ to stare through it, Pervert," he goaded. "Get a nice eyeful, did you?"

Levy's face heated. "No! No, that's not–"

"This is the first time I've had a woman as a neighbour. Gotta say, I'm enjoying it so far."

There was something in his eyes that betrayed his intentions. Somehow, he didn't look at all malicious. Rather, he seemed like he was having a hard time holding a conversation. With that in mind, Levy allowed herself a moment to calm down. Relaxing her shoulders, she laced her fingers together behind her back and offered him the most sincere smile she could muster in the given situation.

"What?" he asked, raising a brow as he looked her over. "What is it? What're you lookin' so worked up about?"

"Gajeel," she started, allowing herself a few quick breaths, "I really want the hole fixing."

He was a picture of apathy. "Sure. Whatever."

"What? Really?"

"Yeah, if yer gonna get all annoying about it I'll try and fix it myself. It'll cost more than I have to get a repairman in so if you're fine with it, I'll see what I can do."

Levy was so filled with gratitude she couldn't resist the smile growing on her face. "Thank you!"

He waved her gratitude away with the flick of his wrist. "Whatever. Consider it thanks for the bowl."

"I really appreciate it," she told him. "I'm going to leave you to it, okay? I have a lot of unpacking to do and an unfortunate amount of cleaning."

Gajeel let out a sudden laugh. "This place is what you'd call a fixer-upper. You'll find that most of the folks living here are no different."

"I don't really mind," she said, avoiding his statement about the residents. "Honestly, when things are too easy I become restless. I like to challenge myself and to work hard for the things I achieve. If I had everything handed to me all the time then I wouldn't be able to fully appreciate the good things in my life, right?"

Gajeel answered with silence.

"Well," she went on, making her way over the screws and the bolts and the mess, "I'll be going now. I have a kitchen to scrub and, you know."

"And I have a wall to fix," he grumbled. "See ya later, Shrimp."

She paused in the doorway. "It's Levy."

"I know," he chortled. "You said that already."

Upon finally returning to her room, Levy sank to her knees in the middle of the floor. Her heart was pounding in her ears like rapids pouring into a narrow crevice, squeezing the walls until they threatened to crumble away. Every breath seemed to rattle through her. Gripping a fist over her chest, she took a moment to slow her racing heartbeat.

"Did I get you all hot and bothered, Shrimp?" Gajeel asked through the wall.

 _She'd already forgotten about the hole._

In a fit of panic, Levy tossed one of the beanbag chairs at the hole in the wall. "What're you doing, Gajeel?!"

"What you asked me to," he explained. The end of his finger stuck out of the wall where he'd wedged it into the hole. "I wonder if I can stick something in here to temporarily block it. I bet you'd have no problem fittin' in here, Shrimp."

 _I hate him_ , she decided. _Hate, hate, hate him._

Levy clutched the second beanbag chair to her chest and took to burying her face in it. She hoped with all her heart that he could fix it. She couldn't take any more of his irritating jokes. Certainly not when they were at her expense. If only Lucy were here; she would fix it. She fixed everything.

 _Crack._

"Damn it," he griped. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

The blood drained from Levy's face. The tiny, almost insignificant thumb-sized hole was now, in fact, a palm-sized hole. She could see him staring at her through the gap he'd created. Cracks protruded from the edge of the hole like tiny veins threatening to burst. Levy's heart was in her throat.

"What did you do?!" she gasped. "It's _bigger_ than before!"

"Thank you," he said, licking his bottom lip as he tugged at the belt of his pants.

"Not that!" she screamed. "Stupid Gajeel!"

"Quit yer yellin', I'll fix it, I'll fix it," he promised.

"I think you've done enough," she said in a wave of panic. "We have to call someone."

Crawling on her hands and knees to inspect the mess on the floor, Levy felt her heart swell uncomfortably in her chest. This was even worse than before. She could see straight through the hole without so much as pressing her face to the wall. Lily was curled up on the couch behind Gajeel, pawing at the sleeve of his jacket.

"Well, it's gonna cost more than I have to fix this," Gajeel groaned. "Unless you're packin' some extra cash then I suggest we find a temporary solution."

"I guess we just have to block the hole for now."

"Block it, huh?"

Levy peered down at the pile of crumbling plaster on the floor. There, under the mess, was the photograph she'd wanted to hang up. "That's it!"

"What's it?" he asked.

"I can stick photographs over the hole for now."

"You don't have anything bigger?" He paused to laugh. "Of course you don't."

Levy scowled. It was the height of the hole that was the problem. She didn't have anything tall enough to block it. At least the photographs would be easier to stick up.

"Do you have any better ideas?" she asked, leaning back to sit on her knees.

"Leave it," he shrugged. "I'm not interested in lookin' at your flat chest anyway."

Levy's mouth opened to convey shock where words failed her.

"It was a joke," he insisted. "Just stick yer damn photos up."

Levy exhaled a deep sigh. "I will."

"Good."

"Great."

"You do that," he coaxed.

"I will."

No longer heated from the incident, Levy relaxed and raised the photograph to get a better look at it. What she wouldn't give to be back in University. Things had seemed easier then. The work was stressful but she'd had people she could rely on. There was something unsettling about being alone in an apartment with a stupid hole in the wall.

"Twenty-three years old and this is what I have to show for it," she sighed. "Well, it's better than nothing... I guess."

"If yer not up to living alone, why not stay with your parents?" he asked.

Levy scowled in his direction. "That would be impossible. They're a little out of reach."

"Strapped for cash, eh? I know that feeling. My old man went overseas to finish a job and never came back. It's–"

Wiping a tear from her cheek, Levy slapped the graduation photo across the hole and held it there with the flat of her hand. "Sorry. I'm going to finish unpacking now."

For the first time since they'd met, Gajeel didn't argue with her.

* * *

That night, when the moon shone defiantly in the overcast sky, Levy lay in bed thinking of all the time she'd spent relying on her friends. Lucy had always been there to pick her up when she needed the support. There were so many faces she wanted to see. So many voices she was going to miss.

She felt so lost without them.

A collage of photographs looked back at her from the opposing wall, shielding her from Gajeel's prying eyes. It was easy to forget that the hole even existed when she had so many familiar faces watching over her. Jet and Droy with their goofy smiles. Erza with her many trophies. Natsu and Gray fighting over something stupid. Lucy's parents, too, had made their way onto Levy's wall of memories.

She could remember running through the halls of the Heartfilia home, screaming and laughing as Lucy's mother chased after them. Levy had been there through it all. She'd watched Lucy cry in the middle of the night when her father passed away. She'd watched Layla's steady decline as illness and heartache took her. Though there had been some bad times, neither of them had stopped dreaming. Together, they'd ventured off into the vast city of Crocus, where they'd finally earned their degrees.

And now, for the first time, they were walking their paths alone.

Levy missed Jude and Layla. They'd been like family to her. Lucy's parents had taken Levy into their home when she'd had nobody else. She didn't want to burden them or their daughter any longer. She would make something of herself. She'd become a better person, a stronger person, and make her family proud.

She wondered if her parents were watching over her.

Blinking away the tears, Levy turned her attention on the ceiling. Every now and then the light bulb twitched with the movement of feet above. She could hear the people in the apartment below yelling at one and other. Somewhere in the distance a dog was howling. She could hear Gajeel tinkering with something near the hole. Every now and then he stopped what he was doing to cuss.

She supposed, in a sense, that Gajeel was very similar to her. He lived in the building because, she assumed, he had no one else. His father was overseas, he'd said, which left him to fend for himself. He was a difficult read. One minute he was extending kindness to a cat that wasn't his and the next he was insulting her size.

She hated that she couldn't shake him from her mind.

"Damn it, Lily. Get yer paws off that," she heard him say.

A period of silence followed before Lily answered with a high-pitched mewl of his own.

"Don't give me that," Gajeel snapped. "I'll revoke your milk privileges. You're gettin' too old for that stuff anyway."

Levy rolled onto her front and laughed into the crease of her pillow. What was it about their meeting that had enchanted her so much? The rest of the day had been filled with thoughts of the man next door, not that she'd ever admit that. And now her dreams would likely take such a form as well.

He terrified and amazed her all at once.

Their stories had intertwined thanks to that stupid hole in the wall. Despite how much he infuriated her, Levy couldn't deny that she was eager to turn the next page. She wondered what living next to Gajeel would be like from now on, wondered if they'd continue to quarrel. She couldn't shake the feeling that she hadn't seen the last of him. That, somehow, they were going to be more than just neighbours.

This was just the first page of their story, after all.

* * *

 _I'm actually so, so happy with the way this story is going. I've planned out around thirteen chapters so far. This is the first time I've felt in control of my plot. Little details will come up again later that seem insignificant at this point. I really want to flesh out their relationship, to show them bonding as friends. I really want this story to be fun and fluffy while also touching on the general issues of growing up and finding your place in the world._

 _I'm planning to make this story a lot more light-hearted than my usual angst/drama plots. So expect a lot of laughs to counter the occasional fit of tears. It's my first time writing a multi-chapter Gajevy fic so I'm really, really excited!_

 _Next update: 1st February (dates are subject to change if I have to work)._


	2. Lost

**A/N:** Thank you so much for all of your feedback! Your comments have been amazing. This chapter will be fairly light-hearted but also start opening doorways for future conflicts. Gajeel's backstory will steadily come to light over the next few chapters as well!

* * *

 **Chapter Two: Lost**

* * *

 _ _So when you get the chance -  
__ _ _are you gonna take it?  
__ _ _There's a really big world at your fingertips  
__ _ _and you know you have the chance to change it.__

* * *

Wind thrashed and rattled through the old building, urging Levy up the stairs two at a time. She couldn't believe her luck, or lack thereof. Drenched from head to toe, she struggled her way up the narrow steps, taking care when turning corners not to snag her bags on the railing. Tangled locks of hair fell over her eyes, temporarily obstructing her view as she battled her way from one floor to the next.

Living on the third floor had its perks – the view of Magnolia Town was beautiful, there were less residents to make noise, and no one could see into her apartment from the outside – but it also had its flaws. Six winding flights of them, in fact.

With bags of groceries slung over one arm and her jacket folded over the other, Levy traipsed her way up onto the third floor. It wasn't really the stairs that posed a problem, though. _Oh no_. It was the fact that the grocery store was an hour away from the complex. It was the fact that, despite being well prepared, Levy had _still_ managed to get caught in the rain. It was the fact that, in spite of all her hard work over the past week, she _still_ didn't have enough money to buy the things she needed, nor could she find a job in her field.

Being an adult was impossible.

When she finally reached her apartment, Levy dumped her bags on the ground in the lobby and took a moment to stretch out her arms. Her body tingled as the circulation began its steady return. Brushing wet skeins of hair back from her face, Levy adjusted her headband and rolled her shoulders back until they no longer ached with the weight of her journey home.

The lack of windows in the lobby made it difficult for her to find her key, even if it was the middle of the day. She ended the struggle victorious, however, when she finally managed to wedge it out from between her phone and recent copy of _Daybreak._ With key in hand, Levy bent to retrieve her bags and discovered a sliver of light poking out of Gajeel's doorway. A quick glance told her all she needed to know about the source of light. The door was partially opened, giving her a restricted view of the kitchen counters on the other side.

 _Gajeel was home already?_

Levy had come to learn that Gajeel rarely ever came home before dusk. They hadn't crossed paths much since their first meeting. In fact, he'd only managed to insult her a total number of four times in the past week. Not that she was counting...

The light coming out of Gajeel's room shifted across the lobby floor, vanishing under the oppressive form of a figure passing by the door. A sudden clatter inside the room set Levy's nerves on end. Somebody cussed.

Levy's blood ran cold. Was somebody trespassing in Gajeel's apartment? Was he being burgled? A single bead of sweat trickled down Levy's temple, dripping off the edge of her chin. She could almost hear the sound of it hitting the bag of groceries beneath her.

"Gajeel? she asked, hopefully. "Gajeel, is that you?"

Another clatter spurred her into action. Throwing the door open, Levy flew into his apartment without any rational thought holding her back. Everything seemed to happen in a single heartbeat. One second she was stood trembling outside his door, the next she was standing in the middle of his room.

Gajeel was crouched in the middle of the floor, Lily's bowl nursed in the palms of his hands. He looked to be in some kind of trance. Levy thought an eternity had passed before he finally managed to blink. The way he stared so intently made her eyes burn sympathetically.

"Gajeel?"

"Lily..." He didn't seem to hear her.

"Did you run out of milk?" she asked, glancing at the bowl in his hands. "I bought some from the store if you–"

"My cat," he whispered.

Levy flinched when Gajeel dropped the bowl and threw his arms into the air. He turned on his knees to look at her with bloodshot eyes. His face was swollen. His arms dropped to his sides like a marionette whose strings had been severed without warning.

"G-Gajeel?" she squeaked.

Had he been _crying_?

"Lily is..."

Levy's breath caught in her throat. "Lily's what, Gajeel?"

 _"Gone."_

Levy blinked. "What? Did you find his–"

"He's gone," he repeated. "Gone. _Missing_."

Levy's eyes widened. "He got out? Did you leave the window open again?!"

Gajeel shuffled across the floor on his knees to grasp at Levy's thighs. His fingers groped at her stockings, persisting until she laid a hand on his head. She was suddenly grateful for the wet skeins of hair twisting over her face. Anything to hide the growing flush of embarrassment on her cheeks.

At this point in time she couldn't tell who the real feline was – Gajeel or Pantherlily.

" _My cat,_ " he stressed.

"Hey, look, we can find him if we search together. He probably got scared by the thunder we had this morning," Levy insisted. "Come on, he can't have gotten far."

With a seemingly reluctant nod, Gajeel climbed to his feet. When he stepped by her, every fibre of Levy's being seemed to come alive all at once. His body was so warm yet oddly gentle, like the scorching touch of a dragon's breath blowing past in the wind. Levy resolved herself to following after him.

With Gajeel's help, the two of them had her groceries stored away and were racing back out into the throttle of rainfall mere moments later. He sped on ahead of her, disappearing into the fog of wind and rain. Levy found herself struggling for breath as she gripped the hood of her jacket and held it tight against her ears. The weather sure picked its moments.

"Gajeel, wait!" she called after him.

He didn't seem to hear her, or maybe he was ignoring her due to panic. For someone who seemed reluctant to accept Lily as his own, Gajeel sure did worry about him when push came to shove.

Three streets later they still hadn't found poor Lily and the familiar growl of thunder had returned to the sky. Crimson streaks of waning sunlight bled out into the horizon as night cut into what little remained of the day. Heading off in the opposite direction, Levy made her way into alleyways and buildings, asking passing residents if they happened to see Pantherlily on their journey through the rain. None of them had.

Each flash of lightning prickled Levy's skin as she raced to the deafening beat of rumbling thunder. While the storm didn't frighten her, the prospect of never finding Lily did. She couldn't imagine how someone like Gajeel would react to that. He had a rough exterior but somewhere deep down she knew there was a vulnerable man trying to find his way in the world.

Levy's search took her, eventually, to one of Magnolia's numerous parks. Empty due to the growing ferocity of rainfall, it was easy for Levy to take a good look around. She didn't find Lily in any of the trees, nor did she find him hidden in the children's play-area.

Taking refuge under one of the larger trees in the area, Levy took a moment to enjoy the rustle of leaves and the gathered scent of wet grass. Were it not for the panic still rushing blindly through her veins, she might have enjoyed the cold touch of rain on her hot skin.

"Did you find him, Shrimp?" Gajeel's voice asked in the distance.

Levy squinted under the rim of her hood. "No. I take it you didn't find him either?"

Gajeel growled his disapproval. "No, I didn't. Shit, where could he have gotten to?"

"I'm sure he'll show up. He's grown attached to you, Gajeel. He knows he's welcome home as soon as the rain clears up."

"Listen, Shrimp, I'm gonna take another look around."

Levy sneezed. "If that's what you really want to do."

Rubbing her nose with the back of her hand, Levy peered up to find him staring at her. Black hair was pressed to his frostbitten cheeks, making him look almost as frightening as the day they'd met. The sorrowful look in his eyes only seemed to enhance the unapproachable air pressing in all around him. Those same eyes seemed to take in every inch of her skin as they appraised her, travelling the length of her jacket, which stopped at her waist to expose the frilled folds of her lilac dress. When finally his eyes stopped at her feet, Levy felt herself growing hotter still. Feverish and not at all ready for one of his insults, she took a step forward and placed a cautionary hand on his arm.

"I'll help you look," she started. "If we–"

"Let's go back," he interrupted.

"What? I thought you wanted to–"

"Let's just go. That stupid cat can return by himself if he wants to."

Levy blinked drops of rain from her lashes. "But Gajeel–"

"Let's just go," he snapped, seizing her arm to drag her out of the park. Levy allowed herself to be pulled along, if only because her legs were growing numb to the bite of the wind. She couldn't shake the feeling that he was sacrificing the remainder of his search for her well-being.

A shadow of guilt chased her all the way home.

* * *

"Take off your clothes."

Levy folded her arms over her chest. "Excuse me?"

"Your clothes," he said, gesturing this time with the descent of his arm, "take them off."

"Stupid Gajeel!"

"You're soaked," he reminded her. "And you sneezed the whole way back."

Levy shook her head. "I can go back to my own apartment. I'll change there."

"Just take off your damn clothes," he insisted. "I saw your sorry excuse for groceries. So, ya know, as thanks..."

Levy stripped her jacket and hung it on the hook beside the door. "As thanks, what?"

"I'll, ya know, cook."

Levy's eyes widened. "I won't be long, just let me–"

"Just take off your damn clothes and sit down. I'll find you something to wear until they dry."

He wasn't used to company, she realised. Or, rather, he seemed to think he was doing the right thing by taking care of her.

"Fine, but turn around."

He did so, if only to approach the drawers beside his bed and begin rummaging through them. Levy seized this opportunity to shed her wet clothing. The effort made her cringe. It felt as though she were peeling away additional layers of skin. Shivering as the cold air lashed against her body, Levy was suddenly fiercely grateful that her underwear hadn't gotten drenched in addition to the rest of her.

"Use this," he said, tossing a shirt over his shoulder.

Levy caught the huge t-shirt and quickly tugged it over her head. She could barely believe the size of it as it enveloped her in his borrowed warmth. Brushing the material over her thighs, she quickly removed her stockings and let her bare feet breathe in the fresh, dry air.

"Thank you..."

"It's just a shirt," he said, still rummaging through drawers until he extracted a second t-shirt for himself. "You're the one who went out in the rain to help me find Lily. There're towels in the bathroom if you wanna use on."

Levy gave a bashful shrug. "It was nothing. I'm worried about Lily, too. I wouldn't want him to be–"

Words failed her when he started taking off his clothes. Gawking in the solace of bewilderment, Levy could barely find the strength to swallow as he tossed his damp shirt over the back of his couch. He unfastened the belt of his pants but didn't make the effort to remove them just yet, instead turning back to the drawers behind him. His muscles swelled each time he breathed, reminding her to do the same.

"Um..." She wasn't even sure what to say. Her eyes seemed to be doing the talking, skimming over his large frame, taking in the texture of his tanned skin and the firm shape of his muscle . Sure, she'd seen him naked through the hole, but the view was an entirely different form of spectacular up close.

That's when she saw it for the first time: the unusual tattoo on his left shoulder. It looked almost like an eye with a curled tail. She couldn't quite make sense of it. There was something about it, though; something unsettling and familiar that made her look away when he caught her staring.

"I didn't know you had a tattoo," she remarked.

"Yeah," he grunted. "Just the remnant of a stupid kid doing stupid things."

"Remnant, huh? That's an awfully big word for you, Gajeel."

He snorted. "An' that's an awfully big shirt for you, Little Girl."

Levy grabbed a fistful of his shirt and huffed her displeasure. "That's five."

"Five?"

"Insults," she explained.

Gajeel stopped searching his drawers to laugh. "Keepin' count, Shrimp?"

"It's not how it sounds." It was _exactly_ how it sounded.

"So, earlier, you looked to be strugglin' with those bags," Gajeel mumbled, shuffling behind the couch to take off the remainder of his clothing.

"That's because the rain was..." Wait, how did he know that?

"There's no shame in askin' for help," he went on. "Ya know, if you want it."

Levy pressed her lips together and listened to the clink of his belt buckle being opened and closed as he changed his pants. She couldn't shake the unusual feeling that she'd known him all her life. That they'd crossed paths countless times before. She was oddly comfortable by his side and, yet, he made every nerve in her body tingle with trepidation.

Combing the hair back from her face with her fingers, Levy removed her cotton headband and used it, instead, to fasten her hair back into a ponytail. Relieved to have the excess hair off her face, she then turned to Lily's empty bowl. The memory of Gajeel's pain-stricken face made her heart ache. She wondered if poor Lily had found shelter from the rain.

"He'll be all right," Gajeel muttered, stepping away from the couch in order to access the kitchen cabinets. "Lily was pretty beat up when I found him, but he made it through. This is no different."

Levy pressed a hand over her chest. "Gajeel..."

"Enough loitering, sit down and, ya know, make yourself at home."

Levy shifted the weight from one foot to the next. "Do you want any help?"

"Why? Can you actually reach the overhead cabinets, Shorty?"

Inflating her cheeks with air, Levy hopped over a mess of screws and flopped back onto the couch. Drawing her knees together, she smoothed out the end of her borrowed shirt and turned her attention on the hole in the wall. She had to wonder what would happen if the wall retained more damage. Would they have to leave their apartments?

Her thighs throbbed from all the running she'd done. The walk from the grocery store hadn't helped things, either. Maybe she did need a little help after all. "Gajeel...about my groceries..."

"I know," was all he said.

* * *

"Stupid thing," Levy muttered, rattling the key in the lock until the door to her apartment finally swung open. The rain had slowed its heavy assault on the building, making it easier for Levy to hear the creak of Gajeel's bed through the wall as she slipped inside.

Losing Lily had taken a toll on him.

Flicking the light on, Levy set her freshly dried clothes on the kitchen counter and shuffled across the small space. Despite their similarities, Levy couldn't believe how different Gajeel's place was to hers. The atmosphere was entirely different. His apartment didn't feel all that much like a home. Though, Levy couldn't imagine how he'd managed to stick it out for so long. Two years would be torture for her.

Fidgeting with the end of Gajeel's shirt, Levy offered a smile to the photographs hanging on the wall. "I'm home."

 _Meow._

Stepping back in surprise, Levy threw her hands up in surrender, half-expecting something to leap out and grab her. Lily scampered across the floor instead, fur stood on end as he took a moment to familiarise himself with Levy's face.

"Lily?" she gasped.

He mewled his response.

 _Lily!_

Smiling into the palm of her hand, Levy knelt to stroke his fur with the other. He was a little damp, but it seemed as though he'd taken shelter for some time. Relief absorbed the tension in her shoulders.

"Where have you been?" she scolded. "How did you get in here?"

He dropped his head in an almost apologetic manner. Levy couldn't believe her luck: Lily had come home. Gajeel would be so happy.

Hoisting Lily into her arms, Levy cradled him against her chest and made a break for the lobby. In an elated fluster, Levy loaned the majority of Lily's weight to one hand so that she could knock on Gajeel's door with the other. She rapped her knuckles against it in quick succession, eager to see his expression when he caught sight of Lily in her arms.

The door flew open and Lily, apparently bubbling with excitement, jumped out of Levy's arms and skittered into the apartment. Gajeel blinked in surprise. He seemed to stare at her for some time, his expression blank as he tried to process the blur of motion.

"I, um, I found your cat..."

Gajeel stood motionless.

"Actually, he found me," she confessed. "He was in my apartment and–"

"Hang on," he interrupted, swinging the door to a close.

Levy stood in the dark lobby, trying to recall if she'd said or done something to upset him. When she couldn't remember, she spiralled into a sudden flush of apprehension. Folding her arms across her chest, Levy listened to Gajeel moving through his apartment. She could hear something clattering on the other side of the door.

"Gajeel, um, I'm going to head back to my apartment," Levy called out, hoping to rid herself of the growing tension.

Footsteps galloped to the doorway, temporarily stopping Levy in her tracks. Yanking the door open, Gajeel thrust a a large, rectangular object into her hands.

"Good night," he said before slamming the door closed once again.

Alone in the darkness, Levy gripped the object in one hand before returning to her apartment. Exposed in the light, Levy discovered that the object was, in fact, a hand-crafted photo frame. Wooden in structure, it had poorly fashioned flowers etched into the edges. Levy stared in astonishment for what felt like a lifetime.

It was the perfect size to cover the hole in the wall; the perfect size for her graduation photo.

Setting the frame down beside her clothes, Levy plucked the photo from the wall and risked a glance through the palm-sized hole. Gajeel was leaning over the arm of his couch with Lily tangled around the back of his neck. Their eyes met when she cleared her throat.

"Pervert," he grumbled without so much as looking at her.

Levy let that one slide. "Gajeel... Thank you."

He shrugged his shoulders, prompting Lily to leap up onto the back of the couch. "I had some things laying around, thought I'd put them to good use."

"Tomorrow..." she started, trailing off when she realised neither of them had looked away yet.

"What about it?"

"It's Saturday," she whispered.

"Yeah, so?"

"You'll be home in the day."

"I'm losin' you, Shrimp."

Clearing her throat, Levy grabbed a fistful of her borrowed shirt. "It's my turn to make dinner."

Gajeel raised a brow. "I don't want food poisoning."

In a huff, Levy slapped the photo across the hole and taped it back into place. Sliding down the wall, she leaned her head back and sighed into the poorly lit room. The light-bulb began to flicker as rain once again pelted the windows. "Stupid Gajeel."

She heard sudden movement behind her. Refusing to budge, she drew her knees over the wooden photo frame in her hands and listened to the patter of rain drumming against the window. The moon looked impossibly beautiful through the foggy glass.

Gajeel banged a fist on the wall behind her. "Dinner sounds good."

Levy smiled to herself. Maybe those six flights of stairs and the hour-long walk from the grocery store weren't so bad after all.

* * *

 _Oh gosh, it's 1am and I stayed up to finish this chapter. I just wanted to say thank you so much for all of your positive feedback! I spent most of my week mapping out the key points in this story so I don't forget to cover anything touched upon in early chapters! I'm really excited to get this story going. Juvia will be making an appearance in chapter three, so look forward to that. :D_

 _I just wanted to add that Lily is approximately 6 weeks old and is still drinking milk for a reason. His diet is actually a means of bringing both Juvia and Wendy into the story at some point, haha. So don't worry too much. A lot of his behaviour won't be primarily true to a "real" cat because, well, I like to make things a little different and eccentric since this is still, technically, a Fairy Tail verse despite the "modern" touches._

 _ **Next update:** February 8th._


	3. Of Late I Think Of Oak Town

A/N: Surprise! Early update! :D I honestly never expected this kind of feedback. Your comments here and on tumblr have been so inspiring. Thank you so much for sticking with me on this journey! This chapter will actually be in Gajeel's POV for a change! :)

Also, I'm having a litttlllee trouble with the line breaks so, you know, if something seems to change randomly there should probably be a line there. xD

* * *

 **Chapter Three: Of Late I Think Of Oak Town**

* * *

 _ _ _And I know I shouldn't say it  
___ _ _ _but my heart don't understand  
___ _ _ _why I got you on my mind.___

* * *

"The sunset is beautiful today."

Gajeel flicked his gaze down to the side of her face. She was staring off into the distance, swinging her empty hands back and forth. Without the lumbering weight of groceries on either arm, Levy seemed almost content to be walking the hour-long trek back to their apartment building. The distance made it a lonely journey for any one individual, but together, the walk seemed to go by fairly quickly. Their mutual purchase of groceries had become a regular activity, as had eating dinner in one and others company. It not only saved them time and energy, it spared them a few extra Jewels along the way.

Swinging two of the bags over his shoulder, Gajeel allowed himself a moment to bask in the calm of dusk. Streamers of light struggled on through the twilight, beseeching life as the impending night slowly pulled them out of sight. It was a vision to behold, he'd agree; though never aloud. And never to her.

"It's all right," he grunted, instead.

"I read a book yesterday that talked about the sunset for a good five pages," she said , admiring the flickering remains of sunlight. "It was the most beautiful description I've ever read. And now it's like I'm living in those pages."

"Reality must be difficult for you," he commented.

That got her attention. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean, if yer head's always in those books then reality must seem pretty disappointing in comparison."

"No!" she protested. "No, of course not. Books are an escape, but they're also a doorway that leads to a whole other perspective. Another reality. Every author has studied the world and taken things from it. Every book, in some way, is a reflection of their perception of reality. It's interesting to see what kind of things people consider beautiful."

Gajeel didn't quite know what she meant, but he figured he could understand. Authors, writers, they had to get their inspiration from somewhere. Without a reality to draw images from, they wouldn't be able to create new ones. Like how it would be impossible to describe a colour without showing it to the person who asked. Rather than providing a place to escape, they simply made reality better. Or, something like that. He couldn't imagine what she'd want to change about her reality, other than the state of her apartment building. From what he could tell, Levy had lived a good life up to now. She seemed to have it together.

He couldn't really fault her for seeking out an escape, though. He'd done exactly that when he'd moved to Magnolia Town. He was running away and he was ashamed of that.

Gazing up at the sunset, Gajeel found his thoughts drifting back to his home town. For a moment, he thought he saw a glimmer of his father's stern expression in the glow of sunlight up ahead. He rubbed his eyes to erase the image and looked, instead, at Levy's face.

 _Bite me, Old Man._

"Anyway, enough book talk," he told her, lowering the bags from his shoulder and sliding them down his arm into his hand. "I can't make it to dinner tonight."

If he didn't know any better, Gajeel might've thought he sensed a touch of disappointment in her gentle brown eyes. She appraised him with a solemn expression that slowly changed to a look of apathy.

Her lips pulled together as she mulled over his words. "Okay."

Part of him wanted to apologise, but another part of him reigned in that desire. He was under no obligation to spend time with his neighbour. Hell, the last one had moved in, made a racket, and then left. And the one before that, well, Gajeel had never even met him. Shrugging his shoulders, Gajeel began to separate their bags on either arm for easy disposal when they reached their apartments.

"Oh, yeah, while I remember." He put a hand on her shoulder, slowing her to an eventual halt. "About the window, I'll fix it soon."

Levy smiled at that. "Like you fixed the hole?"

"Oi, that wasn't, I mean..."

Her smile brightened. "I'm still surprised that Lily managed to climb all the way up and get into my apartment."

"What I wanna know," he said, releasing her shoulder to set off walking again, "is how the hell you didn't notice that your window is jammed."

"I just thought the building was old and, you know, permanently cold. I didn't realise until we had that huge storm that the window was even open. I tried to close it but, as you saw, it's pretty well stuck."

Gajeel let out a laugh. "You sure aren't very observant. For a bookworm, I mean."

"I had other things on my mind," she told him.

"Sure," he teased.

She inflated her cheeks and sulked on ahead of him, like a little kid whose parents wouldn't let her have her way. Yet, there was nothing childlike about Levy McGarden. She was, for lack of a better word, impossibly _mature_. So much so that she'd acted like his mother during their first meal together, berating him for reaching into the microwave without gloves or a towel. He still grinned at the memory. She wasn't tall enough to reach up and take the bowl from him so he'd held onto it a little longer, at the expense of his calloused – and freshly burnt – fingertips.

When they reached the apartment building, Gajeel ascended the stairs in her shadow, watching as she occasionally pulled herself up with the railing. When they reached the third floor he lowered her bags to the ground and shoved a hand into his pocket, fingers groping for the key buried deep inside it.

"How is it, then?" he asked, retrieving the key when he'd managed to locate it beneath a stash of loose change. "Your new job."

"I love it," she said, though her eyes betrayed her true feelings. "I'm having fun. Working with books is fun."

"You don't wanna spend your life in a bookstore, though?"

Levy shook her head. "No. But for now, it's all I have. It's as close as I can get to becoming an editor. I want to hold brand new books in my hands, to read them before anyone else. I want to be a part of the process that unleashes stories on the world. It's...it's like magic."

Gajeel snorted. "Everybody knows there's no such thing as magic."

"You, Gajeel Redfox, need to open your mind."

"And you," he gestured to her apartment, "need to open your door."

* * *

"You cleaned it!"

Gajeel rolled his eyes and melted against the arm of his couch. Juvia paraded through his room like a fairy testing her wings, prancing back and forth over the freshly cleaned flooring. Her blue hair, though a little deeper in colour, reminded him of Levy's. Somehow, everything seemed to remind him of Levy lately. He considered the reason, but never came up with a response. She was interesting, like those books she read. He'd lost count of how many times he'd caught her talking to herself only to discover, later, that she'd been immersed in a piece of her favourite prose.

"It's so clean!" Juvia went on excitedly.

"Yeah, well, _you_ sure as hell weren't going to clean it," he admonished.

Juvia pursed her lips and took a glance at the empty spot where all the broken glass had been. Gajeel found himself grinning. Levy had noticed the pile straight away and assumed he was a drunkard. He wondered if she still had such a vision in mind when she looked at him.

"Juvia is sorry," she told him.

"You're too emotional when you're drunk," was all he said of the matter.

"It was a matter of the heart!"

Gajeel snorted. "What a waste."

Juvia gripped her skirt and silenced him with a look of disgust. "Matters of the heart are not to be ignored. Juvia learned that much when she left Oak Town. Gajeel, too, should learn to open himself up a little more. That's what _she_ would have wanted."

Gajeel flinched. Cold shimmers of anguish poured through his veins like acid that threatened to burn right through him. His heart ached when the pain reached it. "The heart is vulnerable. I don't need it."

Juvia sighed. "So, Wendy said hello."

Gajeel smiled at that. She was a tough little kid, growing up in one of Oak Town's most run-down areas. There was a time when Wendy, and only Wendy, believed in him. He'd betrayed those beliefs and shut her out. He'd shut everyone out for a while. She'd been better off without him. When Grandeeney had offered to take her in and teach her about medicine, Gajeel had quickly distanced himself for fear he'd ruin her life the way he'd ruined Juvia's. The latter would argue against such allegations, but it didn't change how he felt. He felt responsible for a lot of her heartache. It was his fault she'd gotten involved in his problems.

"Did you bring it?" he asked.

"Yes," Juvia held up a paper bag filled with an assortment of different packets. "Wendy said that Gajeel has been spoiling Lily too much, so he might have a difficult time changing his diet. She recommended adding a tiny bit of milk to his food in order for him to get used to it. She wasn't sure what kinds he would like, so she put in a little of everything. She added a leaflet in here too, somewhere."

Gajeel let out a laugh. "She's still efficient, I see."

"She misses her big brother," Juvia shrugged. "She just wants to help."

Big brother, huh? Somehow, the words seemed to sting. "She has people there."

Juvia seemed to consider her response before speaking again. "That doesn't change how she feels about you."

"Enough with the emotional pep-talk," he dismissed. "How are things with Mister Cold Shoulder?"

Juvia scowled. "Be nice."

"I'm just sayin', that guy can be a real jerk from what you've told me."

"So can you, Gajeel," she reminded him.

He was about to protest when someone knocked on his door. His eyes drifted unconsciously to the hole in the wall. He knew it was her without even opening the door. She had a rhythmic knock, the same _thump thump thump thump thump_ pattern each time. He couldn't tell if she did it on purpose, or if somewhere along the line she'd programmed the beat into her mind and was now incapable of knocking in any other way.

Juvia swung the door open before Gajeel had time to blink. Sure enough, there she stood, blue hair tucked away beneath one of her many headbands. She went ashen at the sight of Juvia in the doorway, as though considering, for a moment, if she'd knocked on the wrong door.

"Gajeel's new neighbour is so cute!" Juvia gasped.

Gajeel sank lower on the couch. "Quiet down, Juvia."

"I'm sorry," Levy said from the doorway. "I, um, Lily got into my apartment again, so I..."

Gajeel did a quick sweep of the room with his eyes. Sure enough, Lily wasn't there. "Damn it. How does he keep doing that?"

Juvia glanced over her shoulder to where she'd propped the window open. "Ah, sorry. That would be Juvia's fault."

Gajeel growled his displeasure. "Well, whatever. Thanks for bringing him home, Shrimp. We won't keep you any–"

"Come in, come in," Juvia interjected. "Juvia will make you some tea."

"Juvia..." Levy paused, as though testing the name in her mind. "I'm Levy."

Juvia didn't offer an answer, instead immersing herself in the art of making tea. She was nothing if not a perfectionist.

Levy seemed to hesitate before finally stepping into the room and setting Lily on the ground. He appeared to be getting heavier, given the way she struggled to bend with him in her arms.

"Wow, you cleaned up," she noticed, giving her brown eyes the time they needed to scan the entire room. "It looks good."

"So, Gajeel has his neighbour over when his room is messy, does he?" Juvia asked, retrieving an assortment of different sized mugs from the kitchen cabinets. "You must be close~"

Levy laughed into her fist. "Not really."

There was a looming silence as Juvia went about making the tea. Every noise seemed to agitate him, from the hiss of running water to the plop of added sugar. The clink of the spoon as she stirred their drinks made him cringe. "I didn't _ask_ her to come barging in. She saw the hole and came in to accuse me of being a pervert."

"I did not!" Levy whined. "I mean, I did, but I didn't accuse you of anything! I just wanted to get the hole fixed!"

Juvia raised her head to glance between them. "Could this be...a lovers quarrel?!"

"Keep that imagination of yours in check, Woman!" Gajeel snapped.

"Wait, she knows about the hole?" Levy asked.

Gajeel glanced over at Juvia. "She's the one who found the damned thing."

"Love stories unfold when two people gaze at each other through that hole," Juvia explained. "That's how I met my beloved Gray."

Gajeel cringed at the memory. The two of them had been furnishing his apartment two years ago when Juvia had exclaimed, not-so-discreetly, that there was a half-naked man parading through the apartment next door. Gray had never actually noticed the hole, or, maybe he didn't care, but it wasn't much later that Juvia started to pester him for a date. A little while later he moved in with some guy named Lyon and Juvia went into a steady decline until she found him again.

Her efforts were nothing if not inspired, given that she did, eventually, achieve that first date.

"Wait, did you say Gray?" Levy asked, crouching on the balls of her feet to stroke Lily's fur. "You don't happen to know his surname, do you?"

"Fullbuster," Juvia told her. "Why?"

"I had a suspicion you might say that as soon as I heard the name Lyon. It's just, I know him," Levy admitted. "We went to high school together."

The spoon fell out of Juvia's hand with a resounding clatter. "Love rival!"

Levy waved her hands in a fluster. "N-no! No! That's not how it is!"

Despite Levy's reassurance, Juvia hiked up her skirt and walked out of the kitchen with a look of determination in her dark eyes. Gajeel snorted his amusement, but the feeling dissolved when he caught sight of Levy staring at Juvia's exposed legs. The blood drained from his face when he saw what she was looking at.

"That tattoo..." Levy said, trailing off as she tried to place it in her mind.

Juvia glanced down at her exposed thigh. "Oh, this? Juvia keeps it as a means of atonement. It's a reminder to keep growing and changing."

Levy glanced between them. "As a means of atonement?"

Gajeel glared at Juvia from across the room. "Juvia, the tea?"

Juvia frowned and lowered her skirt. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. Juvia isn't ashamed any longer; you shouldn't be either."

Gajeel glowered at her, his hands fisted on either side of him. " _Juvia_."

Levy seemed to shrink into herself as she watched the two of them argue. Gajeel couldn't help but notice how often she tried to steal glances at his face. She was observant. Too observant.

"You're close, aren't you?" Levy asked from the ground, snuggling Lily to her chest. "I mean, because you have matching tattoos and all."

"We are, I suppose," Juvia explained, setting Levy's tea down on the floor beside her. "We grew up together and joined Phantom Lord tog–"

"Juvia," he warned. "That's enough."

"We were – _are_ – like siblings," she went on. "Juvia loves Gajeel like a brother. And Gajeel teases Juvia as he would tease a sister."

"Something like that," he said, hoping to dismiss the matter entirely.

Juvia settled on the arm of the couch, where she proceeded to nurse the warm mug in both hands against her lap. He couldn't help but notice how warm she was beside him.

"There really isn't anything to be ashamed of," she said again.

Gajeel growled. "Leave it alone, Juvia."

Juvia took him prisoner in her passionate eyes. "Gajeel..."

"Phantom Lord?" Levy asked, seemingly confused by the name. He was grateful for that much, at least.

"It's nothing. Forget it," Gajeel pressed. "She's just rambling."

Juvia wasn't letting this one go. "Miss Belno wouldn't want you to be like this."

Gajeel leapt off the couch, fists at his sides, and pierced Juvia with a glare that could cut through steel. "I want you to leave."

Juvia blanched. "Gajeel, it's not–"

"Both of you," he snapped, turning his eyes on Levy. "Get. Out."

He could feel the pain of their conversation begin to constrict around his heart, squeezing it until the life very nearly drained from his body. Unclenching his fists, Gajeel stomped through the room, swung the door open, and waited for them to leave. When the two girls shuffled away, shoulders hung and heads down, he slammed the door shut behind them. He welcomed the temporary flush of silence as it filled the empty room.

Lily, sensing the mood, hopped up onto the couch to lay beside him when he retreated to his place of solitude. He could hear them exchanging goodbyes outside his door. He listened for the click of Levy's door and the familiar sound of her footsteps entering the room.

Wiping the sweat from his forehead, Gajeel allowed himself a moment to think of Belno, and of his time in Oak Town. He moved a hand to wipe further sweat from his cheeks, surprised to discover, instead, a trail of tears.

"Shit," he growled.

"Gajeel?" Levy's voice was gentle as it trespassed into his apartment. She didn't unblock the hole, nor did she linger beside it.

"What is it, Shrimp?" he mumbled in response.

"I'm sorry."

He rolled his eyes and wiped a tear from his cheek. "For what?"

"I-I just am. I just feel like I should apologise."

He shook his head. Everyone was always apologising. "Don't be."

"I didn't know you were having company. If you'd said so I would have waited to bring Lily over."

"It wouldn't matter," Gajeel muttered. "She's like this every time she visits. She seems to think she can save me from something."

Juvia was determined, she'd said, to alleviate Gajeel of his guilt. She wanted him to be happy. Stupid woman, he thought. She should focus on herself for once. Juvia had managed to free herself of her ties to Phantom Lord and of the terrible things they had done before the gang's inevitable disbandment. Gajeel could not. He just hoped Juvia wouldn't try to involve Levy. He didn't want that.

"You know," she said, evidently sitting somewhere against the wall when he no longer heard the movement of footsteps, "I lost my parents when I was little. That loss changed me in ways I could never have imagined. I was lucky, though, that I had Lucy. Her parents took me in and they treated me like family. For a moment, I allowed myself to be happy. That pain never really goes away, though. I want to see their faces all the time. But that just means we have to live on in their memory. I think, if they were here, they would want me to pursue my dreams. So I do. I keep on going, because whether they are here or not, that is what they would want me to do. That is what _I_ want to do."

Gajeel trembled with the weight of her words. Belno, too, had wanted him to live a fulfilling life. To live a life of meaning. The pressure of those last words still ghosted through him on occasion, leaving him empty and numb to the point he thought the wind alone could shatter him.

"I'm not saying this so that you'll open up to me," she went on. "I just wanted you to know that your desire to lock the past away isn't strange. A lot of people simply want to look forward to tomorrow. We can't let our pasts define us. I believe, wholeheartedly, that people can change. That they do. Our pasts, our tragedies, they don't always justify our actions, but they do explain them and allow us to understand ourselves better. It's what we do, right now, in this moment, that defines us."

Gajeel clapped his hands against his cheeks. "Jeez, Shrimp, what did you make yourself for dinner? Nostalgia Soup?"

Levy laughed to herself. "I think this Belno woman wouldn't want you to grieve, either. I know you're probably not ready to talk, or that you might never open up about yourself to me at all, but I will listen, Gajeel, if you need me to. It's not good to bottle things up."

"I don't need you to listen," he said in response. "But thanks."

"For what's it worth..."

Gajeel steeled himself for what she might say next.

"I think your tattoo is really cool."

* * *

 _This chapter was mostly about setting the scene for the, well, greater plot, I suppose. Hahaha. Chapter four will actually take us out of the apartment complex for the first time! Lucy will be introduced over the next few chapters, too, since the Levy/Lucy dynamic kills me._

 _Your feedback is always, always appreciated. And to those of you who point out my typos: thank you. You are a blessing._

 _To the guest saying apologise should be 'apologize.' I'm from the UK. In my area specifically we use s in place of z. Memorize is memorise, for example._

 _Next Update is scheduled for February 15th._


	4. Pervert!

**A/N:** Thank you so, so much for being patient with me over the last two weeks. As some of you know, my Fiancé is visiting me from the USA and we went to London for a few days. He's still here but he's distracted enough for me to write today! I'm really rusty, so bear with any of my mistakes. :D

* * *

 **Chapter Four: Pervert!**

* * *

 _ _ _ _You make me glow but I cover up won't let it show.  
So I'm putting my defences up  
'cause I don't wanna fall in love.  
If I ever did that, I think I'd have a heart attack.____

* * *

There was something to be said for the comforting scent of old book shops. Every inch of dust seemed to carry with it the essence of time. Shelves contained countless lives, countless possibilities in the pages that sat upon them. One day, Levy wanted to be in control of those pages. While writing was a pleasure in itself and she did enjoy dabbling in the craft, what Levy wanted most in the world was to be a part of the process. Not necessarily because she was, for lack of a better word, _average_ at writing, but because she simply loved to read. There had been a time when books were all she had. Being an editor, stepping into the lives of characters before anybody else, that was her dream.

With an elbow on the counter, Levy propped her chin up in her palm and stared at the sign hanging over the front door. From her side of the counter it read closed, but to anyone passing by it offered a cheery, bold-lettered OPEN. Not that it seemed to matter. The novelty bell hadn't chimed once since she'd walked through the door that morning to begin her shift. She'd watched a number of people pass on by, occasionally glancing at the display of old classics in the window. She couldn't imagine passing up the opportunity to hold one in her hands. To Levy McGarden, those people were of another species entirely. She needed books like humans needed oxygen to breathe. Books were also a core part of her friendship with Lucy. Because of books, Levy had been able to come out of her shell and talk to Lucy in a way she'd never spoken with anyone else.

Despite the lack of customers, there was something quaint about the old, quiet store that made Levy enjoy the peace while she had it. Tall wooden cases with multiple shelves lined the right side of the room, littered with books of all ages. The counter sat across from the front door, giving Levy the perfect view of Magnolia's bustling streets. The display of classics sat in a window adjacent to the entrance, where its covers seemed to glisten under the thick lamp hanging above them.

The rain continued to fall without mercy, as it had for the majority of that week. It hammered on the windows with a force that seemed to threaten the entire foundation of the store. Levy could have sworn that the building itself shivered once or twice in the cold. It was a wonder that such an old place could withstand the kind of weather Magnolia had been plagued with over the past week.

She wondered how Lily was coping.

"The rain has certainly been persistent these past few days, hasn't it? Are you making your way home all right?"

Levy glanced over her shoulder to find Mirajane dusting off one of the old books from the store room. It was a week today that Levy had first pressed her face against the window to get a better look at the display. Mirajane had just closed the store, but was kind enough to allow Levy a moment with the books she loved so much. It hadn't taken long for the two of them to establish a bond.

Levy had learned that Mirajane's parents had passed away and, in doing so, had left their little store to her. While it wasn't her true calling, she wanted to keep a roof over the head of her siblings. Levy had refused the job offer on the grounds that, well, she didn't think Mirajane should spare expenses on an employee – but Mira had insisted that she wanted more time to spend with her younger sister, who had recently recovered from an illness that once kept her bedridden. Hearing that, Levy couldn't really refuse. The pay wasn't much, but Levy was more than content with the job. For now, at least.

"I don't mind the rain," she said in response, straightening to stretch both arms behind her back. "It's almost comforting. Rainy days are a good opportunity to stay at home and read, after all."

"I'm thinking of closing up early today," Mirajane said, replacing one of the books in the window with the one in her hand. "The storm is going to get worse tonight. You should head home soon."

"I'm fine, Mira," Levy insisted. Honestly, Levy wasn't in any rush to go home. She was tired of sitting in an empty apartment all by herself.

"Please," she said. "Just for today. There have already been accidents on the roads this morning. I don't want anything to happen to you that could be avoided."

Levy realised then that Mirajane's concern came from a trepidation rooted deep inside her memories. When she looked at Levy now, she no longer saw an employee who lived a good distance away. No, she saw her parents as they waved goodbye and never returned. She saw the faces of her siblings as they received the news that their parents were gone. Levy knew the feeling of loss well and so gave a simple nod to reassure Mira that she would heed the warning.

"If you're okay with it, I'll go. I wanted to stop by the grocery store today anyway. Thank you, Mira. You should head home early today, too. Your sister will be happy to see you, I bet."

Mirajane's smile could light up the darkest, emptiest regions of space. "Take care of yourself, Levy. I'll see you soon."

"You too, Mira."

* * *

Mirajane had been right about one thing, at least: the storm had definitely gotten worse. Levy, on the other hand, had been unable to avoid it. As though being pelted by an onslaught of never-ending rain wasn't enough, Levy's bags had torn during her ascent up the seemingly endless flight of stairs leading up to her apartment. And then, to top it off. she'd picked up the wrong ingredients for her stew, leaving her with an assortment of random vegetables and a broth she'd rather not taste.

Today was not a good day.

Part of her was starting to miss the days when Gajeel walked her home. She hadn't seen him in a while. He disappeared in the early hours of the morning and seemed to slink back into his apartment late at night. She couldn't be sure, but it felt like he was avoiding her. Even when he was home he didn't seem to make any racket. Her once loud, obnoxious neighbour had become a shadow that passed over her in silence. Every now and then, against her better judgement, she'd lift the framed picture off the wall to get a peek inside his room. She told herself it was for Lily's benefit, but, really, Levy was just worried about Gajeel. She received the occasional text from Juvia asking how he was doing, but Levy never found herself able to answer. Truth be told, she just didn't know. Maybe she didn't want to know.

Her worry seemed to melt away after taking a bath, though. While the water was sparse, it was hot enough that Levy didn't care how few bubbles dotted the surface or that it only reached the beginning of her waist when she sat up to wash her hair. There was something to be said for the comfort of a cool tub against her back and the rippling surface of hot water as it gripped her legs that made everything else seem obsolete.

With a towel wrapped around her frame and a mess of wet hair scraped up onto her head, Levy shuffled out of the bathroom and allowed herself the freedom to sink into a beanbag chair, unencumbered for the first time. She knew Gajeel wasn't home – he never was – and so the thought of him sitting by the hole didn't faze her. Not that it mattered when she took the liberty of covering it with her graduation photo.

Letting the beanbag wrap itself around her, Levy gazed up at the ceiling and watched the low hanging bulb dance as the wind rattled through the building. She couldn't believe how feeble the apartment seemed under the rough hands of an afternoon breeze. Every now and then, especially in the dead of night, Levy would imagine the building surrendering to the storm and crumbling all around her. The image was real enough and frightening enough that she deemed it a possibility in the future.

Despite an early leave and the painful lack of customers, Levy had accomplished at least one important thing during her shift today. She'd managed to find a novel that her friend Erza _hadn't_ read yet. She'd confirmed the transaction herself, of course. She wouldn't want Mirajane to think her a pervert if she happened to see her making this particular purchase.

Dipping into the paper bag she'd left close by for convenience, Levy pulled out the novel: a slim, paperback cover that came as a prequel to a saucy little series Erza liked to read in private. Though she fought to keep her hobby a secret, Levy was absolutely certain, without an inch of doubt, that anyone close to Erza had caught on to her perversions by now. If it wasn't cake she was devouring, Erza was likely soaking in the sordid details of mature prose. Levy laughed to herself at that and flicked the book open to get a look at the inside. Her cheeks warmed when she noticed the prequel came with inked illustrations that spanned almost a third of a page. This one in particular showed more of a man than she cared to see at this point in time. Slamming it closed, she squeezed her eyes shut as if to burn the image from her mind.

"So, the little Shrimp reads those kinds of books, huh?"

She'd recognise that laugh anywhere. The mind-throttling _gihihihi_ that washed over her like an annoying shower of rainfall on an otherwise sunny day. Levy tossed the book on the ground and drew her towel tight against herself. Her eyes skimmed one corner of the room to the next before settling, finally, on the exposed hole in the wall. The building quaked as if to confirm her suspicions: the picture had fallen off the hook during the storm. In her manner of overconfidence, Levy had forgotten to check the room before sitting down opposite the hole.

Gajeel's fierce red eyes seemed to scorch right through her soul when her gaze crossed his. She pressed her arms over her chest and glared at him with the savagery of a bull seeing red. Part of her wanted to scold him, but the other part of her, the part that was winning, told her to stay quiet. The humiliation inched across her face, making its way down her neck in waves of overwhelming heat.

"Pervert! Peeper!" she cried, surrendering to her need to shout. "Stupid Gajeel!"

"Trust me, Shrimp, I ain't interested in that flat chest of yours," he scoffed, though a flicker of humour dared to trespass in his voice. "I just happened to notice that the hole was uncovered."

"Sure you did," she went on, pressing her thighs together and turning herself at an angle that kept her cleavage out of sight. "Perverted Gajeel!"

"An' readin' in a towel no less," he teased. "Seems to me like _you're_ the pervert."

Levy could feel the anger boiling its way through her. It was the same anger she always felt when he teased her. It came to her like fire cloaked in smoke that tried to suffocate her. And then, when she'd caught her breath, it came in waves of hurt that tried to douse the flame. She knew he was teasing her, she knew he didn't mean it, but something in Levy cared about the things he said. She'd never admit it, but part of her wanted him to like her. She might not be beautiful like Mirajane or voluptuous like Lucy, but she deserved to be treated like a woman just the same.

He'd ignored her for over a week and then, despite everything, Gajeel had the nerve to verbally insult her. Standing from her seat, Levy stormed out of the room and proceeded to stand in the lobby, clad in her towel, and pound her fist on his front door. She could hear him laughing as he moved through the room, the sound only serving as fuel for the raging fire that ignited when he swung the door open. He caught her fist in the air and looked down on her with a grin that exposed his teeth.

"Well, well, what do we have here? A little pervert has been caught in my trap."

Levy yanked her fist free and proceeded to fidget with her towel. "You're a jerk."

The sound of a door opening in the distance turned his attention on the lobby over her shoulder. It was a heartbeat later that he pulled her into the room and slammed the door shut behind her, his smile turning to a scowl as he looked over her towel-clad form.

"What're you doin', idiot?"

"You're the idiot," she snapped. "You're the one who was peeping even though you said you never would! Stup–"

"You're the one who stood out in the lobby wearing a towel!" he interjected. "Jeez, do you know how many creeps live in this building?"

"Yes," she sulked. "You're one of them."

"Nice," he said, rolling his eyes as he released her wrist.

The chill of water dripping from the ends of her hair reminded her that she was, in fact, naked underneath her towel. It wasn't until that moment, as beads of remaining water trickled over her bare skin, that Levy felt truly exposed. And now, to top it off, Levy was naked in _Gajeel's apartment_ , of all places.

"Where have you been, anyway?" she asked, letting her eyes scan his apartment. Lily was curled up on Gajeel's bed and his bowl contained the messy remains of dinner. "I didn't hear you come home last night."

"What are you, my mother?" he chastised. "Why do you care what I'm doing late at night? Maybe I had somewhere to be, little girl."

Levy smacked both hands against his chest. "Little girl?!"

"Er, Shrimp... You might wanna..."

A quick glance at his face told her all she needed to know. His cheeks, tinted pink, inflated as he turned his eyes away from her. She felt her towel, which had come open and slipped down to her waist, make its final descent to the floor. Throwing her arms around herself, she screamed an incoherent string of _pervert_ and _idiot_ before he finally turned away.

Snatching the towel off the floor, Levy quickly wrapped it around herself and proceeded to storm towards his front door. Tears bit at the corners of her eyes, tears that, for some unknown reason, carried with them a great deal of heartache. "I'm leaving!"

"Wait," he caught her arm as she reached the doorway. "It's Friday."

She didn't turn to look at him. "So?"

"It's my day to cook."

Levy's lips quivered with a mixture of frustration and joy. Frustration that he was brushing off their fight, but joy that he remembered their arrangement. Swallowing her pride – and her indignation – Levy relaxed her posture until his hold on her arm slackened.

"It _is_ your day to cook," she confirmed. "But you're never home, so I thought–"

"I'm home now," he said. "Get dressed and come over. Lily misses you."

Levy smiled to herself. "I miss him too."

* * *

Levy couldn't remember the last time she'd eaten spicy food. Gajeel's curry was one of the best, making the moment seem all the more special. He sat to her left on the couch, fishing thick chunks of chicken out of what little remained of his sauce. She'd never seen anybody eat like he did. He seemed to pick out the ingredients one at a time. She couldn't see a single grain of rice in the concoction on his lap. He'd started with that first, then the vegetables, then the sauce, and now, well, it was the chicken's turn to be devoured.

"Say, Gajeel, are these new?" she asked, spinning the warm bowl around in her lap. "I don't remember your bowls being so...blue."

Gajeel grinned to himself. "They're not."

"What? They look pretty blue to me."

"That one's yours," he told her."

Levy blinked. "It's what?"

"You gave me your bowl when you moved in an', well, I was going to give it back when I bought new ones but Lily seems to have taken a shinin' to it. So, ya know, I bought new ones. The blue ones are yours."

Levy nearly dropped the bowl from her hands. "It's...it's mine?"

"I guess. If you want it."

Levy's cheeks warmed. "Gajeel..."

"If ya don't want 'em I can use 'em for–"

Setting her bowl on the ground, Levy threw her arms around him. It was as instinctive as coming to shore for breath and equally as exhilarating. Her arms locked around his shoulders and in a single beat she realised her mistake. He gripped his bowl in one hand, the other sitting on her waist in his attempt at steadying her. Neither of them said a word as he held her. In fact, she wasn't sure a single word existed in the entirety of Earthland's diction that could provide an explanation for what she'd done.

"Um... Thank you..." she whispered, pulling back to wipe hair from her embarrassed face. "Sorry. I don't know why I did that."

Gajeel cleared his throat and scraped his fork against the floor of his bowl. "It's just a bowl, Shrimp."

"I-I know," she said. "I know that. I was just, I was touched."

Gajeel laughed. She couldn't be sure, but he looked a little embarrassed. He kept his eyes on his food, still digging through the remaining pool of sauce trapped beneath a pile of chicken in the bottom of his bowl. "Your curry is getting cold."

Levy was interrupted mid-stretch by the vibration of her phone in her left pocket. Pulling it out, she took a quick glance at the screen while reaching down for her bowl with her free hand.

It was a message from Lucy.

* * *

 _I'm really looking forward to writing the next chapter. Things are going to get really stirred up and we're going to learn more about Phantom Lord! Thank you for being so patient with me. Updates will be a little random until I get back into the swing of things. My Fiancé leaves this Sunday, so I hope to have another update ready for you all on Monday. :)_


	5. Home

**A/N: I've had Lucy's appearance planned out for a long time. I love her dynamic with Levy and you'll be pleased to know I plan to have her reappear with Natsu in later chapters as well. :)**

* * *

 **Chapter Five: Home**

* * *

 _ _ _ _ _'Cause you've been hurt before,  
I can see it in your eyes.  
You try to smile it away,  
some things you can't disguise.  
Don't wanna break your heart,  
baby I can ease the ache._____

* * *

"I can't believe it," Lucy said with a laugh that skimmed across the boundary between a gasp and a hiccup. "My Levy is growing up!"

Levy rolled her eyes. "We're the same age, Lu. I live next to a boy. I'm not marrying him. He doesn't even know I exist, anyway."

"What are you talking about?" Lucy hiccuped. "He made dinner for you! He bullies you. I'm pretty sure, Levy, that he notices you. The question you want to ask yourself is whether or not you _want_ to be noticed. You're so cute, there's no way he wouldn't-"

"The question I need to be asking myself," Levy interrupted, pulling Lucy's glass out of reach, "is whether or not I should let you carry on drinking."

"Leave her to it," Cana said from behind the bar. "She ain't hurtin' anybody. Besides, I've get a _great_ view when she slouches like that."

Levy stifled a laugh when Lucy carefully adjusted the neck of her shirt and sat up straight. It was typical of Cana to tease Lucy relentlessly whenever the two crossed paths. She was the kind of person who liked to pick on the people she loved without mercy.

"Don't serve her again," Levy instructed. Cana gave a nod but her smile betrayed a different answer. It seemed peculiar to see Cana standing _behind_ the bar rather than sitting, or, well, slouching in front of it. Levy, too, wanted to work with something she loved. Books to Levy were like alcohol for Cana. That thought made her smile.

"Levvvvyyy," Lucy sang, "tell me more about this Gajeel."

"He's just... He's just my neighbour," Levy shrugged. "I don't think he even sees me as a friend. We just help each other out from time to time, that's all. What about you, anyway? What's your big news? I didn't sleep at all last night so you'd better stop stalling and tell me what it is."

"Assertive Levy is the best Levy," Lucy purred. "Fine, fine. I'll tell you."

After receiving Lucy's message, Levy had finished up her meal and used it as an excuse to return home. The tension had been suffocating. Neither Levy nor Gajeel could find the words to say after their sudden embrace. Levy wasn't sure why she'd made such a big deal out of it. In fact, it _wasn't_ a big deal when she placed reason to emotion. That didn't change anything, though. Levy's heart wasn't easily swayed by logic. Not this time.

Lucy leaned forward, readying her excitement. Her brown eyes held an arsenal of emotion in their depths that relaxed every muscle in Levy's body. She couldn't even begin to imagine what kind of news Lucy had come armed with.

"I did it, Levy."

"Huh?" Levy skated a fingertip over the rim of her glass. "Did what?"

"I finished it," she went on, her smile widening to show teeth. "I finished my book."

"You finished it?! Already?!" Levy choked on the shock in her voice and inched herself closer to Lucy. "And? Go on! Spill! Do you have it with you?"

"As promised," she said, dipping into the bag hanging from her shoulder, "you're my first reader."

Levy snatched the papers from Lucy in her excitement. " _Fairy Tail?_ What does that mean?"

"Why don't you read it and find out?" Lucy teased. "Actually, Natsu's to blame for the title. He sort of came up with it."

"Natsu?" Levy squinted suspiciously in Lucy's direction. "Did he read this already?"

"No, no," Lucy insisted with a wave of her hand. "Erza and I were trying to help him with his spelling so that his grades wouldn't suffer. We were writing an analysis of old fairy tales and, well, Natsu's inability to differentiate between 'tail' and 'tale' proved to be sort of inspiring. I happened to remember it when I was finishing up one of my chapters and, well, I thought it was kind of fitting."

"That's so cute," Levy laughed, feeling a little guilty for having jumped to conclusions. "Oh, speaking of Erza, do you think you can pass this onto her the next time you see her?"

Fishing through her bag, Levy pulled out the erotic novel that very nearly cost Gajeel his head and pushed it across the bar before packing Lucy's novel in its place. Lucy, with a quick glance at fellow customers, snatched it up and shoved it into her bag. Her cheeks were blazing red.

"Levy!" she hushed, as though the book had just announced its presence to the entire room. "Don't just hand me things like that in public."

Levy grinned to herself. "What're _you_ getting so embarrassed about? Aren't you and Natsu already-"

"Enough about us," she interrupted, banging a palm on the bar to silence Levy before she could tease her blushing companion. "What about you, Levy? What about this, this-"

"Gajeel," Levy reminded her. "And there's not really much to tell. He's my neighbour. We met by chance." She danced around the subject of the hole in her apartment wall for fear her drunken friend would get the wrong idea. "He's an interesting sort of person. A little rough around the edges, but I think he has a soft heart under that exterior. He has a lot of piercings and really long, black hair. I don't think I've ever seen a man with such thick hair. At first I thought he was some kind of delinquent but, I don't know, he doesn't seem all that bad. He's usually pretty...friendly."

Was friendly the right word to use?

"Usually?" Lucy asked, determined, apparently, to squeeze every last detail from Levy's tiny body. "Did you two have a fight?"

"Not really. I mean, it's nothing big. It wasn't my fight. He had a friend visiting and she said something that upset him so he kicked us out. She kept insisting that he shouldn't be ashamed of his past. Something about him being part of a group called Phantom Lord. I didn't really understand it so, well, I just kept out of it. It wasn't my place to say something."

If Levy didn't know better, she'd think Lucy had just sobered up. Her eyes looked hollow and black against her pale skin. "Did you say...Phantom Lord?"

Levy stared into her near-empty glass, watching the liquid swirl along the edges as she shook it around. "Yeah, that's right. What about it?"

Lucy placed a hand on Levy's arm. The bar seemed to have fallen quiet. Levy found herself wishing she hadn't said anything at all. Her mind wandered, for a moment, to her embrace with Gajeel the day before. The warmth of that memory seemed somehow painful to recollect in the haze of Lucy's concerned gaze. She was beginning to regret mentioning him at all.

"Levy," Lucy started, her voice becoming serious as she pulled strands of long hair over her right shoulder, "Phantom Lord was the name of a gang that used to cause trouble in Oak Town. Actually, they used to cause trouble everywhere. They stirred up rumours all over the continent. Fiore was alive with stories. No one ever really got to see their faces, or even how many members the group had. The papers could only hope to speculate, at best. They seem to have been around forever."

"Rumours?" Levy asked over the mental ring of panic in her ears. "What kind of rumours?"

"Lots of rumours. Some are worse than others. A lot of people thought that, maybe, Phantom Lord were just a bunch of kids who would vandalise streets for attention. Then there are rumours that suggest otherwise. One of the worst came when the group disappeared two years ago. The rumour that they disbanded because one of their members killed someone and ran away. Look, Levy, if Gajeel was involved with them in any way..."

 _"Yeah, I know there's a hole. Been livin' here for two years, ya know."_

Levy held her glass in a vice-like grip. "No. The name came up in conversation, that's all. Maybe I heard them wrong. I was so flustered."

"Well, it's no good worrying about something that might not even be true. Besides, there's only one real way to tell if someone is a member of Phantom Lord, since nobody knows _exactly_ what they look like or how many members they have in total."

Levy forced herself to look in Lucy's direction. "What do you mean?"

"The members of Phantom Lord were said to have matching tattoos," Lucy explained. "They used to paint their symbol all over the place. I'd recognise it anywhere. It looks almost like an eye with a twisted tail underneath it. It was usually a sign that they'd done something they shouldn't have. Some people took it as a warning, others considered it a show of pride or loyalty. They were probably just a bunch of kids with swelled egos. There are a lot of delinquent groups like that. I'm sure it's nothing."

The glass in Levy's hands smashed with a world-shattering crack.

"Levy!" Lucy gasped. "Are you okay? You're bleeding!"

Levy was only vaguely aware of the blood spilling between her fingers, or the sting of pain where the glass had cut her. Her evening with Lucy, her happy reunion, all of it seemed to fade into the back of her mind. All she could see, all she could think about, was Gajeel's tattoo. The tattoo that matched Juvia's.

The tattoo that matched Lucy's description.

"How... How do you know so much about them?" Levy asked.

Cana came to the rescue with an assortment of bandages and disinfectant. She went about treating Levy's wounds while Lucy tried to prolong the inevitable with her silence.

"Lucy?" Levy persisted, thanking Cana when she'd seen to her wounds and cleaned up the bar. "What is it?"

"My father..." There was no hiding the flash of pain in Lucy's eyes. "When we were little, he had shown an interest in Oak Town. He'd wanted to expand his business there. Why not? Oak Town was beautiful and historical and it had a lot of people."

"Lucy, you don't have to tell me this if it's too hard."

Lucy shook her head. "The members of Phantom Lord were probably just kids back then. Or maybe there were older members that nobody knew about. For all we know, Phantom Lord could have been going for generations. But, that aside, they caused a lot of problems for him. I remember my mother crying one night because he wouldn't make it home in time for my birthday. I didn't know it then, but I would imagine Phantom Lord had something to do with his prolonged stay. A few years after he passed away, when I could finally bring myself to go through his things, I found the files on Phantom Lord in his desk. I thought they were interesting, so I used them as inspiration for my novel. At the time, honestly, I thought maybe they were just a myth. Or some kind of exaggeration. But now... I know they're real."

Levy blinked away her astonishment. "Phantom Lord has been around for that long?"

Lucy nodded her discomfort. "I don't know. Maybe they weren't always known as Phantom Lord. Maybe they started as a group of troublemakers with no name. What I do know is that I'm worried about you, Levy. Are you really okay living out here by yourself? You don't want to come and live with me?"

"And play third wheel to you and Natsu? No thanks," Levy laughed, trying to lighten the mood. "Nothing will happen to me, Lucy. I'm not going anywhere."

Lucy smiled her relief. "Promise me that you'll call me if anything happens. Anything at all. I'll catch the first train over here and rescue you, okay?"

"Okay. I promise."

"I love you so much, Levy," Lucy said, falling back into her drunken stupor.

Levy squeezed Lucy's hand. "I love you too, Lucy."

* * *

The walk home had seemed as endless as the rain and proved to be equally as chilling. Levy couldn't shake Lucy's words from her mind, nor could she forget the cold expression on her face. There was something both unsettling and humiliating about Levy's discovery that made her loiter in the lobby a little longer than she'd first intended.

How could things have spiralled like this? She remembered feeling so excited, so anxious, as she waited for Lucy outside the bar. Where was that feeling now?

Water dripped from the ends of Levy's hair, splattering the lobby floor beneath her. The sound of it was near deafening against the chill of silence pressing in all around her. Was it really possible? Could Gajeel be the member of Phantom Lord who fled after killing someone two years ago? Was her neighbour a murderer? Or was it something else?

She'd been hasty in judging him once, Levy didn't want to make the same mistake again. Taking a deep breath, she found the strength to rummage through her bag for the key to her apartment.

The key she couldn't find.

Stunned by her carelessness, Levy tipped the contents of her bag onto the lobby floor. Lucy's novel was there. The tiny knitted bag where she kept her change. Her pens. Everything was there.

Everything, except her key.

Blinded by growing panic, Levy continued to finger through the items from her bag, groping, clutching, snatching desperately for anything that might be her room key. She couldn't afford to have it replaced. She couldn't afford to lose it. All of her things were in that room. She had nowhere else to-

"Shrimp? What're you doin' on the floor?"

Levy choked back her sudden desire to scream. The sound of his voice alone was enough to traumatise her. Stuffing objects back into her bag, she clambered to her feet and made a racket of struggling to open her apartment door. Surely with enough strength she could yank the stupid, old thing open. Anything was better than having to look at his face.

"Oi, take it easy," he said, placing a hand over hers. "You'll hurt yourself tryin' to wrestle with a big door like that."

Levy scowled and pulled her hand out from beneath his. It was difficult to think of him as a murderer when his touch alone made her heart race. "My key. I lost my key."

He let out a sound that leaned closer to a laugh than a sigh, but scaled the boundary well enough that she didn't make a remark. "I didn't take you as the careless type."

"I'm not," she sniffed. "I'm not careless. Not usually. I just had... I had a lot on my mind, you jerk."

She was startled by the expression he showed when she finally dared to glance at his face. His eyes were red and swollen, something he tried to hide under stray strands of hair that only served to make him look paler.

He looked sick.

"Are you okay?" she asked, forgetting herself and her predicament in the shadow of his apparent suffering. "You look-"

"It's nothing."

"But your eyes are so red. Well, I mean, more than usual."

"Allergies," he told her. "Just allergies. Guess I'm allergic to cats. Go figure."

"And you're just realising this now?"

"Guess so." He shrugged, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

"Don't lie to me!" she snapped. "You're always..."

Gajeel placed a hand on her shoulder, a hand that seemed less comforting than it would have in the past. "Come on, I'll make you some of that damn tea you like so much. If you warm up you might remember where you put your key."

"I might have dropped it while I was out shopping," she said, neglecting to mention the part where she'd been sitting in a bar discussing his potential murder with her best friend. "I'll go see if anyone handed over a key in the-"

"You're no good to anybody if you catch a fever. Come inside. Now." Gajeel snatched her bag and proceeded to drag her towards his apartment. Levy didn't deny him, she didn't have the strength or the willpower to try. Lily didn't greet them as they entered his apartment, instead burying his face in a cushion on the couch. It was another stormy evening, which meant Gajeel's poor cat had to suffer one more night of terror. At least, she hoped it was just one more night. She missed the sun.

"Sit down," Gajeel told her, slipping her bag onto the floor. "I'll boil some water."

Levy stood frozen in his apartment. Everything that had once been so familiar felt suddenly out of place. His apartment seemed so foreign now. Distant. Grasping the folds of her skirt, she fixated on the hole in the wall for some time before finding her voice and the courage needed to project it. "Why did you come to Magnolia Town, Gajeel?"

"A change of scenery, I guess."

"You're a terrible liar," she told him, diverting her gaze from the hole to his face. "Your voice changes when you lie."

Gajeel stared at her now as though seeing for the first time. He seemed genuinely shaken by her words, or maybe it was her observation that startled him so much. He avoided responding as he filled a small pan with water and placed it on the stove to boil.

"You lied about your eyes, too," she went on. "You've been crying, haven't you?"

Levy flinched when he bound across the room to seize her arm in one hand. He pulled her closer, swollen eyes filled with contempt. "Mind yer own damn business, Little Girl."

Levy pulled her bottom lip through her teeth. "I won't ignore a friend when he's hurting!"

"A friend?" He scoffed, releasing her arm to turn and check on the stove. "Is that what you are?"

"Am I not your friend?" she asked. "Am I still just a stranger to you? Your neighbour?"

"I don't have friends," he said.

"You have Juvia," Levy reminded him. "And you have me."

"If you say so."

"What are you so afraid of?" Levy pressed. "Is that why you came here? Were you running away from someone? From something? Is that why you were crying today? Are you feeling regret for whatever you did?"

Gajeel banged a fist on the kitchen counter. "My old man is dead!"

Levy's blood ran cold. "What?"

"My old man died this morning. He was flying home from Alvarez. He called before his flight and asked if I would visit him when he returned to Oak Town. I declined," Gajeel said in a quiet voice that betrayed the ferocity of his cold, hardened expression. "And then his plane crashed."

Levy's eyes were wide enough that she couldn't bring herself to blink. Tears stung at the corners, but not a single one had the right to fall. "Gajeel..."

"An' now I have to arrange his funeral. That old bastard walked away from me to work overseas and then he went an' died on me before I could tell him to his face how much he..."

Levy rushed forward to meet him when he crumbled to the ground. He looked so vulnerable, like a baby bird without its mother, alone in a vast woodland filled with nothing but predators. She threw her arms around his shoulders and sat on her knees to embrace him.

"I'm sorry, Gajeel," she sobbed. "I said such insensitive things to you. I didn't mean-"

"I don't care about that," he snapped. "Why would I care what you think?"

Levy didn't know whether to be hurt or relieved. "Please, Gajeel, don't go through this pain alone. I'm here for you."

"As my friend?" he snorted. "You think because we ate a few meals together that you have the right to sit here and console me while I'm weak, is that it?"

"You're not weak," Levy told him. "Wanting to cry, being hurt by others, that doesn't make you weak. So, please, don't shut me out. Talk to me. Tell me about him, about your dad."

"There isn't much to tell," he croaked. "My old man left when I was a kid. I haven't seen much of him since. And now he's dead. Satisfied?"

Levy stood to her feet to turn off the stove. Then, in the silence of his tears, Levy kicked him in the side and sent him hurtling onto his back.

"What the hell, Shrimp?! You tryin' to pick a fight?!"

Levy, hands flat on her knees, bent to give him a weak yet sincere smile. "If you think you can take me, Redfox, then bring it on."

That was it for poor Levy McGarden. He grabbed her hands and yanked her down to the floor with him, rolling them over so that he hovered above her. No matter how hard she tried, Levy couldn't throw him off her. His hands seemed so much larger when he planted them on either side of her head. "Don't start fights you can't win, Shrimp."

Why was it that, even in this kind of situation, Levy felt safe in his arms? What was it about him that made every inch of her feel so completely, undeniably comfortable. He felt like home. In their moment of silence, a smile crept its way onto his face. His cheeks dimpled, a sight that made her entire body tingle.

"You're smiling," she said. "That's the first time you've smiled since we met in the lobby."

Gajeel corrected her with a quick and effortless scowl. "You're really something, you know that?"

Despite their situation, despite the painful news, Levy couldn't help feeling flustered by their position. She clenched a fist over her pounding heart and allowed herself a moment to search the weight of emotion in his eyes.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Gajeel. I really am. When you feel up to it, I'd really like to hear all about him, okay?"

Gajeel rolled his eyes. "You're a troublemaker, Miss McGarden. Ever since you moved in next door my life has been one mess after another."

Levy bit her lip. Her cheeks were on fire. "I'm sorry."

"Don't you have a key to find?"

Levy struggled to sit upright in a flush of panic, banging her forehead against his in the process. He shuffled back on his knees, giving her the opportunity to climb to her feet. Rubbing her forehead, Levy cast a quick glance at the doorway.

"Damn it, Shrimp. You're a pain in my ass, you know that?"

"What are friends for?" she teased.

"I wouldn't know," he scoffed. "I don't have any."

Inflating her cheeks, Levy brushed off her skirt and started a futile search through her bag for the key she'd never find.

"I don't care what you think of me," she said, "but know that I consider you my friend, Gajeel."

"You're never going to find that key," Gajeel chortled, deftly avoiding the subject. "Give it up."

"But I need to get in my apartment."

"You could always squeeze through the hole in the wall," he goaded. "I bet you'd fit with a good shove."

Levy smacked his shoulder. "Gajeel! It's not funny! Without my key I have nowhere to go. I can't sleep out in the lobby, it's too-"

"Stay here, then."

Levy's bag fell out of her hands and hit the ground with a thud that startled Lily from his place on the couch. "What?"

"You deaf?" he grunted. "I said you can stay here tonight."

* * *

 _Updates will be pretty sporadic still. I'm hoping to update more frequently in the future, but I can't pinpoint exact days due to my increased shifts at work. This chapter is a sort of bridge that we'll cross into the main story. Next chapter will have a lot of bonding, so look forward to that, too. I wanted this story to be a little bit more than just a modern roommates au, but the "gang" incident will not take away from the initial dynamic of two people finding their place in the world, either._

 _I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I've been exhausted lately, so it might not read that well. But I really wanted to give you guys another update anyway. :)_


	6. Monochrome

A/N: A lot of you were hoping for smut this chapter. I'm sorry to say that won't be happening for a while, hahaha. Until then, though, enjoy some sexual tension and sad fluff~

* * *

 **Chapter Six: Monochrome**

* * *

 _All my walls stood tall, painted blue.  
But I'll take 'em down, take 'em down,  
and open up the door for you.  
And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies;  
the beautiful kind, making up for lost time._

* * *

Sitting cross-legged on Gajeel's bed, Levy surveyed the room with eyes open to new perspectives. She wondered what kind of man he really was. Did he brush his teeth before or after he ate his breakfast? How often did he change his sheets? Did he separate his colours when doing laundry? Little questions fluttered through her mind, each one teetering ever closer to the question she most wanted to ask.

Was he really a member of Phantom Lord?

Casting such thoughts aside, Levy draped an arm across her thigh and took a swig from the half-empty bottle sitting on the bedpost. Not only was his mattress way softer than hers, even his blankets smelled better. And then, to top it off, the big, scary man she'd been so afraid of was now sitting on the ground at her feet, drink in hand, playing with his feline companion. It was, to say the least, a sight to behold and memorise for future reference. The smile on his face made her heart lift. For a minute there, she'd thought he might start to cry.

"Careful!" she scolded, catching the neck of his bottle when he leaned over to ruffle Lily's fur. "You'll spill it on the floor."

"It'll dry," he said, taking one final swig of beer before setting it on the ground with the five empty bottles behind him.

Bouncing her crossed legs, Levy watched as Gajeel proceeded to sit and snuggle Lily tight against his chest. It pained and delighted her to see him being so affectionate with his pet. Delighted her in a way that made her skin tingle and pained her in a way that made her, for just a millisecond, wish she was in Lily's place. She pulled at the ends of her shirt, the shirt he'd loaned her when dinner turned to drinks and drinks turned to conversation, and allowed herself a moment to rub the sleep from her eyes. Though time had slipped out of their grasp, Levy was almost certain they'd trespassed into the early hours of the morning. Despite the fog of splattered rain on the windows, Levy thought the moon looked quite beautiful where it sat behind a veil of thin clouds.

The sound of rain falling reminded her of something he'd said before. Something that slipped out during one of their spontaneous conversations about bathroom etiquette.

"Wait, wait, wait," she gasped, waving her half-empty bottle through the air for added effect, "so, wait-"

"You said that already," he quipped.

"Wait, wait, wait," she said again, "you're telling me, honestly, truthfully, no lie, that you sing in the shower? _You_?"

"Where the hell did that come from?"

"You!" she yelled. " _You_ sing in the shower?"

"What's wrong with that?" he scoffed. "You do it all the time."

"What?" she barked, nearly dropping her bottle in the process. "I do _not_ sing in the shower! I don't even own a shower!"

"The bath, then."

"I do not!" she insisted.

"You sing the same verse over an' over. I can hear you through the walls, ya know. They're pretty thin."

Levy's face heated. "I do not sing in the bath!"

"That's not all I hear, either," he said, flashing her a grin that made her shudder.

"W-what does that even mean?"

His grin widened. "You know _exactly_ what it means."

Levy's mind wandered to places she wished it hadn't. "I don't do things like that! I'm a virgin!"

Gajeel fell onto his back, howling with a sudden fit of laughter that made the room seem to tremble. "Too easy!"

Levy's heart was pounding in her ears. "You're such a jerk!"

The way he scowled seemed less frightening than it would have been when they'd first met. In fact, for a moment, Levy was transfixed by the movement of his piercings whenever his brows furrowed. They looked almost like stars. He glared at her from the floor, relaying her insult over and over in eyes open to scrutiny like doors stood ajar in a foreign hallway. She didn't know which room to enter first, or where she'd end up, but Levy knew she wanted to open each and every one of them. She wanted to see into Gajeel Redfox's mind.

"Say, Gajeel," she started, leaning down to where he sat on the floor, "what are, wait, wait, I mean, _where_ are your eyebrows?"

Gajeel's eyes widened. "You pickin' a fight, Pipsqueak?!"

Levy broke into a fit of laughter, nearly dropping her bottle a second time. "Oh my gosh! Your face is so funny! What's up with all those piercings anyway?"

Suddenly, Gajeel's expression turned serious. A hint of soberness crept into his red eyes, but not enough to erase the hint of a smile on his lips.

"What is it?" Levy asked, setting her bottle on the ground at his feet. "Is everything okay?"

"My old man got his first piercing," Gajeel started, pausing to point out the central piercing on his nose, "right here when I was a kid. It started out as some stupid plot to get his attention. First, I just wanted to, I dunno, be cool. Like him. Then I started doin' stuff that would get me into trouble, like coverin' my face in piercings and refusing to take them out in class."

Levy couldn't hope to ascertain the sudden darkness in his eyes, but she thought, for a moment, she understood him quite well. His father was away and Gajeel was fighting for a reason to bring him home. In a single resounding heartbeat, Levy had come to see that Gajeel's world was painted black.

"He worked overseas, right? Your father?"

"Yeah," Gajeel shrugged. "I rarely saw him."

"So, then, your mother-"

"Never met her."

"Didn't you have any grandparents? Someone to take care of you?"

"I did have someone..." Gajeel's face twisted in pain. "But she's been dead for two years now."

All at once her conversation with Lucy came crashing to the front of her mind.

 _One of the worst (rumours) came when the group disappeared two years ago._

"I'm... I'm sorry to hear that," she whispered.

 _The rumour that they disbanded because one of their members killed someone and ran away._

"Aren't you supposed to be cheerin' me up, Little Girl? You're doin' a terrible job."

Levy frowned. "It's not easy to comfort someone you know so little about."

Spreading his legs out before him, Gajeel stole a moment in time to fuss over Lily as he climbed across his knees. For someone with such high walls around himself, he sure didn't hesitate to give out his affection when it came to Pantherlily's needs. Levy was relieved to see that.

"What do you wanna know?" he asked, when Lily no longer required fussing.

 _If you're part of Phantom Lord_ , she thought, but didn't say for fear she'd send him spiralling into a pit of despair. "Do you like to sing, then?"

Gajeel laughed at that. "I play guitar. It's not really a hobby, just somethin' to pass the time."

Levy's eyes lit up. "Really?! Will you play for me?"

"What about you?" he asked, deflecting the topic. "What do you do when you aren't readin' or peeping through the hole in your wall?"

"I do not peep through the-" she paused, took a breath, and then finally considered his question. "Actually, I like to study language."

"Ain't that the same thing as readin'?"

"Yes and no," she said with a shrug. "I want to be able to speak as many languages as possible. I want to be able to communicate with people all over Earthland. And, you know, read books from all over Earthland and maybe other places, too."

"Nerd," he teased.

"Shut up," she laughed, risking a glance at the aforementioned hole. "It doesn't matter anyway. No amount of languages or books are going to help me figure out this whole, well, life thing. Growing up is hard. I know that Lucy would have me in a heartbeat, but, I don't want to give up. I don't want to rely on someone else."

When she looked back at Gajeel he was staring at her with a blank expression. There was a sense of understanding in his eyes, but not enough to elicit a response, apparently. Pressing the soles of her feet together, Levy grabbed her toes with both hands and proceeded to bounce her knees on the bed.

"Thank you for letting me stay here," she said, hoping to break the silence with something that inspired a new atmosphere. "I know it's not easy to give up your personal space."

Gajeel laughed at that. "You could say that I'm used to it. My personal space was invaded a lot as a kid. Juvia's the kinda person who latches onto something she doesn't understand with the hopes of figuring it out. She couldn't figure me out an' told herself that we were friends long before I even knew her name. In the end, I think she was just lonely."

"I suppose Gray has his work cut out for him then," she responded. "I envy people like her, though. She's the kind of person who sees the end of the tunnel before she arrives. I feel like I've been wandering in the dark my whole life and I'm still far away from the exit. It doesn't help that I'm afraid of the dark, either."

"Maybe you need to find a new tunnel," Gajeel said, his face illuminated by a sudden fork of lightning in the distance. "With, ya know, lights."

"A new tunnel, huh? I never thought about it that way."

"Someone once told me that there's no shame in working your way back to the beginning if you want to change," Gajeel said.

Levy's heart fluttered with the resounding echo of such powerful words. "You don't think turning back shows weakness?"

Gajeel snorted but offered no opinion on the subject. A second flash of lightning sent Lily scampering to the opposite end of the room, where he buried his face in a pile of cushions.

"Pink," Gajeel said.

"Huh?" Levy's eyes ticked back to his face. "Pink?"

"Your underwear," Gajeel snickered. "I can see it when you sit like that."

"Stupid Gajeel!" she screamed, tossing a pillow at his face.

He snorted a laugh. "Yer the one sittin' with your legs open."

"Jerk! Idiot! Stupid!"

Climbing to his feet, Gajeel leapt onto the bed to sit beside her. She crossed her legs once again and pinned the massive shirt over her thighs. His weight alone was enough to tilt her towards him, albeit unintentionally. When their shoulders touched, it was as though the air itself crackled between them. The world seemed less monochrome as she sat there, his warmth seeping into her. Even Lily seemed to settle down on his mountain of cushions, where he curled up in preparation to sleep through the night's storm.

"No fair," she gasped, turning her attention on Gajeel's feet, which were planted flat on the ground. "They touch the ground so perfectly!"

Gajeel snorted a laugh. "That's because you're too damn short."

Scowling, Levy nudged his shoulder and threw her legs over the edge of the bed to swing beside his. "I'm not _that_ short."

"Right."

"I'm not!" she protested, silently willing herself to grow another few inches for the sake of defending her argument. "I mean, I'm only as big as I feel."

"Who told you that crap?" he asked.

"Lucy," she confessed, scratching at her warm cheeks. "And it's _not_ crap. If I had to pick a role model, well, it would be her. She's so strong and beautiful and smart. Even though she's all of those things and more, Lucy has never given up on me. She loves me for who I am and I will never forget those feelings as long as I live. I owe her so much. That's why, if Lucy says I'm only as big as I feel, then I'm only as big as I feel!"

Gajeel placed a hand on her head. "I didn't think anyone could be smarter than you."

Tilting her head back, Levy stared up at him through the gaps between his fingers. "What?"

"I've heard you readin'," he said. "An' when you talk you use words I've never even heard of. You're pretty incredible yourself, ya know? Don't sell yourself short." He stopped to laugh at his appropriate word choice. "We're all our own people, ain't that right? There's only one you, Shrimp."

"You're a lot nicer when you're drunk," she noted.

"What's with that?" he chortled. "I'm always nice."

"Yeah, right," she laughed, knocking his hand away. "You're a jerk. The biggest jerk that ever lived."

His hand fell to her shoulder, where he proceeded to squeeze her in a way that made her whole body shrink in on itself. "Says you, Shrimp. You've got a pretty vicious bite yourself, ya know."

Levy squealed when he brought his second hand to her other shoulder, making her whole body shudder under the weight of his imposing touch. "It tickles! Stop it!"

He laughed. "Jeez. You have no idea, do you?" His hands fell from her shoulders. "Agreeing to stay the night in some guy's apartment. You have no self awareness at all."

"Right, because my sex appeal is through the roof," she laughed. "I bet you just _can't wait_ to take a peek at _me_ while I'm undressing. I don't know why I even bothered to cover that stupid hole; it's not like you see me as a woman or anything, so there's no harm in leaving it open." Levy clapped a hand over her mouth. "I don't know why I said that. Forget it."

Gajeel seemed to stare at her for an eternity. Her poor attempt at sarcasm appeared to have soured the mood. The bed felt suddenly higher than before, as though it had reached an altitude that left her dangling in the sheer magnitude of his presence. She choked on that presence.

"Is that what you think?" he said, flashing her a grin that made her shiver. "That you're safe in this room, alone, with me? You _are_ a woman, aren't you?"

"We're not alone," she whispered. "Lily is here."

"Yeah, I'm not so sure he'll come to your rescue."

"Of course he will." Levy grinned. "I'm his favourite."

Leaning in closer, Gajeel narrowed his eyes. "Say that again. I dare you."

"I'm. Lily's. Favourite."

A single heartbeat seemed to snuff out the existence of time. Their surroundings melted into one, leaving only him in her focus. It was the way he looked at her that made time seem to stop. Neither of them seemed to know how to deal with the sudden reduction in space between them. In fact, if she didn't know any better, Levy would have thought he'd started leaning in closer. She found herself tumbling into his fierce eyes, into the darkest corners of his mind. She felt cold there, but oddly safe. And then his eyes steeled over with something new, a pigment of colour she hadn't seen before. He continued to lean forward, closing the distance between them at a rate that left her open to thoughts she wished she wasn't having.

Her apprehension waged war on the tingling desire for him to lessen the distance further, leaving her with mere seconds to put up any form of defence. She was trapped in a web of confusion, one hand fisted in preparation to counter, the other laid flat with desire to submit.

There's no way, she thought, still tangled in that web of denial. There wasn't a chance in Earthland that Gajeel Redfox was going to kiss her. This had to be some kind of trick.

"Gajeel..." He was so close now that she could taste the warmth of his breath on her lips. "What are-"

 _Clink._ "Crap."

Levy peered down to where Gajeel had knocked over her bottle, the liquid spilling out all over the carpet. The two of them reached down in a panic to retrieve the bottle, but Levy was the first to retreat when their faces touched.

"I-I'll clean it up," she stammered.

"Just leave it." He shrugged, placing the bottle with the group of empty ones. "It'll dry."

"But it-"

"Levy, seriously, it's okay."

 _Levy_. The sound of her name on his lips made her shudder. Rising to her feet, Levy brushed down the ends of the shirt she'd borrowed and proceeded to stare at the damp spot on the carpet. "But I.."

"Say, Shrimp?"

Levy kept her eyes on the damp spot. "Yes?"

"Will you keep an eye on things here tomorrow?"

"Huh?" Levy glanced up at him. "Take care of things?"

"I'm going back home," he told her, "to figure things out. I've been dancin' around the topic of his funeral and..."

"Gajeel, you only received the news today. You don't have to over-face yourself."

"He has nobody else," Gajeel insisted. "Tomorrow, I'll go back to Oak Town and organise his funeral. So, for tomorrow, can I leave Lily with you? I'll leave you my key, just in case you need it."

"You'd trust me with your key?"

"You're right," he said, raising a brow, "you don't even know where yours is, so why would I give you-"

The sound of Levy's phone ringing startled both of them into a temporary silence.

"Aren't you going to get that?" he asked, when the song reached its second chorus.

"Oh, sure, right. Excuse me." Pulling her phone from her bag, Levy answered without so much as checking the ID. "Hello?"

 _Where are you?! You left your key at the bar!_

She could feel Gajeel staring at the side of her face. "Lucy?!"

 _I was really worried! I tried calling you but your phone was turned off._

"My phone was turned off? Oh! It must have been the storm! Service is really bad out here when the rain pours. Sorry, Lu. I didn't mean to worry you. Where are you now?"

 _I'm outside your apartment building._

Levy's eyes widened. "You're _what_? Outside? But it's so late! Hold on a second, I'll come and-"

Gajeel stared Levy up and down as if to remind her, in his own subtle way, that she was wearing his shirt.

"Actually, you know what, I'm staying with a friend, and-"

 _You're with him, aren't you? Your neighbour?_

Levy choked in an attempt at catching her breath. "No. No, I'm-"

 _Well, don't let me interrupt. I'll leave your key in the mailbox. Lucky for you they put your room number on the keys. Be careful, Levy. And have fun~_

Levy didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. Letting out a sigh, she stared at the screen of her phone for a good minute before diverting her attention to Gajeel once again. "It was Lucy."

"You don't say," he grunted.

"She has my key. She's leaving it in the mailbox."

"That's good, ain't it? You can go home."

Levy's body sagged with a strange amalgam of disappointment and relief as she turned to leave. "Right. I can go home now. Sorry about the bottle and, you know, for burdening you. I'll be next door if you need-"

"You're going outside like that?" he asked.

"Oh, crap," she gasped, glancing around the room for her clothes.

"What're you so afraid of?"

"What?" she asked, glancing over her shoulder to where he still sat on the bed. " Why would you ask that?"

"You asked me," he reminded her.

"I'm not afraid of anything."

He rolled his eyes. "You're a terrible liar."

"So are you," she reminded him. "I guess that's one thing we have in common."

"I can think of other things," he said. "But I won't list them today."

"Will you be okay?"

"O'course. My old man passed away. People die all the time. It's just one of those things."

Levy didn't believe him, but she didn't press the matter. "I'm next door if you need anything."

"I know," he told her. "Hurry up and leave before you make another mess."

* * *

Back in her apartment, Levy couldn't help but the feel an overwhelming sense of loneliness. She couldn't tell if she wanted to cry or just collapse on her bed. Both sounded good. The fit of her own pyjamas seemed less comfortable than they had before. In fact, her apartment itself seemed different. Smaller. Like she'd been boxed in by herself.

Her mind flickered back to their almost kiss, if she could call it that. She was rigid with disappointment. Looking back on it, she realised that she would have accepted his kiss willingly. And that thought in itself was terrifying. She didn't know Gajeel. She didn't know anything about him, really. Romance didn't work like this in the novels. They shared secrets and stories and built a life together. They were friends and lovers and-

Levy screamed when her graduation photo fell with a clatter to the ground. The newly exposed hole seemed to be mocking her as she stared at it.

"Stupid building!" she groaned. "Stupid, stupid storm."

To her surprise, Gajeel didn't have anything to say in response to her scream. In fact, he didn't have anything to say at all. Tiptoeing her way to the hole, Levy slid down the wall to sit beside it. Drawing her knees to her chest, she tipped her head back and listened for signs of movement. Sure enough she could hear him shuffling through the room, his footsteps heavy as he dragged his way across the floor. He must've been locking the door just now.

The springs creaked and moaned under his weight as he crawled back into bed. Then there was silence. Eerie, unwelcome silence that made her shiver with the cold. She wasn't sure how long she'd been sitting there, but something inside Levy had told her to stay put. She couldn't help but notice how quiet their neighbours were. It was as though the apartment building itself had fallen into a state of slumber.

It wasn't until she felt tears trickling down her own cheeks that Levy realised she hadn't been sitting in silence for some time. He was audibly sobbing in the next room. There was no mistaking the sound, no matter how quiet. A string of soft, muffled whimpers left her lips when the sound of his anguish finally struck her in the heart. It was easy to forget that Gajeel was also vulnerable to human emotion. Hearing him like this, recognising his pain, it made her realise that he, too, was human. The flush of colour she'd seen during their night of drinking seemed to slink back into a dull, lifeless monochrome.

"Stupid Gajeel," she whispered, wiping tears from her eyes. "Why won't you let me in?"

* * *

The next morning, when she finally awoke, Levy was still sitting by the wall. Her neck ached and her skin had prickled with gooseflesh during the chill of night. Gajeel was already gone and his key, along with a note of instructions, had been pushed through the hole onto the ground beside her. With those things in hand she left for work, reminding herself to smile for the people she loved.

Reminding herself to be strong.

The store was as quiet as always, save the occasional tourist passing through to browse the historical collection. Levy was relieved to be left alone with her thoughts, though. She couldn't concentrate on transactions when her mind continued to ghost the memory of Gajeel's heartache. The sound of him crying still haunted her. She wanted to erase the noise but no amount of focus or distractions could change what she felt. Even the incessant pang of a lingering hangover didn't help to take her mind off of Gajeel's suffering.

She was reminded of the day Lucy's father had passed away. The sound of her pain, the constant flow of tears, all of it rushed back to her at once. Holding her breath, Levy braced herself for the remainder of the day.

Long after finishing her shift, Levy wandered the streets of Magnolia, aimlessly searching for a reason to return home. The street lamps made the dark tolerable, but the shadows were still as frightening as ever. The familiarity of her surroundings faded as she strolled into the night, but the stars made it all worthwhile. Once or twice she found herself wishing he'd emerge from the darkness to walk her home.

Those feelings went on in vain.

The return home was long and tiring.

Levy was overcome by guilt - and panic - when she remembered her duty to Lily. Dumping a bag of groceries on her kitchen counters, Levy raced over to Gajeel's apartment in order to feed her forgotten friend.

"I'm so sorry," she began to fret, stroking his fur when he'd finished eating. "I'm such a bad house-sitter, aren't I?"

Lily didn't seem to mind.

Collapsing on Gajeel's couch, Levy snuggled Lily against her stomach and thought back to her long day. She'd been so busy feeling sorry for herself - and for Gajeel - that she'd neglected to come home for Pantherlily. She never wanted to lose herself like that again.

"You'd save me from that big meanie, wouldn't you?" she asked, recalling the night before while scratching behind his ears. "You'd never let me down, huh, Lily? Not like I let you down."

Sometimes, Levy thought he looked like he wanted to answer her.

"You're tired too, huh?" she realised, allowing herself time to relax when he curled up on her thighs. "Maybe I'll just rest here for a bit, okay?"

Tilting her head, Levy stared at Gajeel's bed for some time, recalling the sounds he'd made as he cried himself to sleep. It wasn't as though she'd never heard someone cry before. In fact, the sound was as familiar to her as breathing. But hearing _him_ cry, the recollection of it, was like being cut with a knife that bled her dry of emotion. She was numb.

"You'll take good care of him, won't you?" she whispered. "As long as he has you, Lily, he won't be alone, will he?"

Closing her eyes, Levy continued to pet Lily's fur in gentle motions that soothed him to gradual slumber. Not even the nagging pull of hunger could stir her from the couch. It was her desire to shut off her mind that eventually lulled her to sleep in Gajeel's apartment.

But not even sleep offered a chance at peace - Levy's dreams were just as tragic.

* * *

 _The next chapter will be in Gajeel's point of view! I'm looking forward to delving a little deeper into Gajeel's past and into his association with Phantom Lord. Chapter seven is actually already in the works, so it should be posted soon enough! There will be quite a bit of bonding for these two as we go through the events of his father's funeral and explore their relationship outside the apartment. And don't worry, the sad times will be compensated with a lot of fluff. Thank you so much for sticking with me this far!_


	7. I'll Make You Big

**Chapter Seven: I'll Make You Big**

* * *

 _All his life he's been told he'll be nothing when he's old.  
All the kicks and all the blows, he won't ever let it show.  
'Cause he's stronger than you know, a heart of steel starts to grow.  
When you've been fighting for it all your life,  
you've been struggling to make things right:  
that's how a superhero learns to fly._

* * *

Though travelling without any luggage, Gajeel still slouched under the crushing weight of emotional baggage. He was relieved to see the face of his apartment door when he arrived on the building's third floor. The dull grey walls and the dim artificial lighting seemed a little less lacklustre than before, though that could be the fatigue of his journey finally setting in. It was the early hours in the morning and he was more than ready to sleep the day away. He'd taken the earliest train back, eager to return to Magnolia Town - so much so that he'd avoided sleep entirely. He'd sworn to himself that Oak Town would become a memory buried in the back of his mind. He knew better than to make those kinds of promises, especially to himself.

What was it about the past that just couldn't leave him alone? Even now, after all this time, his old man found a way to hurt him. Intentional or not, Gajeel had had enough.

He'd done his best to avoid trouble while visiting home. As it turned out, Gajeel's old man had made his own arrangements, leaving him with the opportunity to escape earlier than he'd expected. All that was needed was his son's permission. Seemed a waste of a trip and, yet, the fresh air had done him some good.

The train ride - not so much.

Holding his stomach, Gajeel let the festering reminder of motion sickness ride through him as he lingered in the lobby. He couldn't return home just yet, he had to get his key from Levy. It was the perfect opportunity - and excuse - to loiter a little while longer. Truth be told, he didn't want to show up at Levy's doorstop looking frail and, well, not at all like himself. He'd gotten used to her treating him like a bomb waiting to explode. He didn't want to change that yet. People didn't get close to bombs, after all.

Not unless they wanted to get hurt.

Sometimes Levy didn't sleep at all, choosing to spend the night buried in one of those books of hers. He'd heard her laughing through the walls once or twice before, giggling to herself as she turned pages that led her deep into the morning. Maybe, if he was lucky, tonight would be one of those nights. Well, if she did happen to be asleep, Gajeel was ready to receive her wrath.

With a sigh, and the nagging gargle of his upset stomach, Gajeel decided it would be better to just get on with it. Tapping his knuckles on her door, he listened for any signs of movement inside Levy's apartment. Nothing. He tapped again, this time a little harder. Hard enough, apparently, to spring the door wide open.

She hadn't locked it.

Peering inside, Gajeel searched the room for signs of his tiny neighbour. A bag of groceries sat untouched on the counter, feeding concern into his sense of confusion. When he didn't find her sleeping, he shuffled into the centre of the room and took a quick peek through the hole in the wall.

There she was, sound asleep on his couch.

With a groan, Gajeel marched his way back to his apartment, where he proceeded to knock on the door. It wasn't long before she opened it, one hand clasping the door handle, the other tangled in the mess of blue hair on her head. She looked perplexed to find him standing there, more-so when he offered a "good morning" that rattled like gravel in his frustration.

"You're home," she yawned. "I didn't think you'd be back today."

"Are you an idiot?!" he asked, unintentionally raising his voice.

"W-what?"

"What're you doing sleeping in my apartment like this? You didn't even lock your damn door. It's too dangerous to-"

"How do you know that I didn't lock my apartment door?" she asked.

"Never mind that," he snapped, folding his arms across his chest. "What the hell were you thinking?"

She shrugged - she _actually_ shrugged - and then banished the tension with the sweep of one arm. "I didn't mean to. Lily and I were hanging out and, um, I guess we fell asleep."

"There are a lot of creeps in this building," he went on.

"Yes," she said, growing irritable as he continued to glower over her, "I know. You're one of them."

"Damn it, Woman." Pushing her aside, Gajeel closed the door behind himself. "You know how to test my patience."

She seemed a little startled, but not enough to fear approaching him again. "What's wrong with you?"

Gajeel's skin warmed when he turned to face her. The blood flourished in his cheeks, gathering heat that disarmed his temper and left him weak in the knees. The strap of her pyjama top had fallen in her sleep, leaving her collar bone and a semblance of cleavage exposed. For someone with such small assets, she certainly knew how to push the right buttons - even if she wasn't aware of it. Swallowing the lump in his throat, exhausted and terribly frustrated, Gajeel reached out to adjust the strap of her top without even considering the consequences.

"Stupid Gajeel!" she screamed, taking a step back to hold her shoulder as though he'd just stabbed her in the arm. "Stupid, stupid, Gajeel!"

"Yer the one lying around my house with yer damn clothes hanging off," he growled.

"I can't believe you just did..." She stopped to take a breath and cast her gaze downwards. "What am I doing?" she asked, bringing her voice back down. "I should be asking him how he's feeling."

"Fine," he said, in response to the question she never really asked. "Funeral's next week."

"Next _week_?" she asked. "So soon?"

"My old man had everything arranged."

"I see."

Scratching the back of his head, Gajeel glanced at Lily, who was sound asleep on the end of his bed. "Anyway, I'm here now. You can head home and-" The sound of her stomach growling reminded him that he, too, was famished. "Breakfast it is, then."

"No, no," she insisted. "I'll go home and eat."

"You're already here, might as well stay for breakfast. Consider it a thank you for looking after Lily."

"But I-"

"Shut up already," he interrupted. "You like bacon?"

"Mhm."

"Bacon it is, then."

"Do you want me to help?" she asked.

"No. Just sit down and wait."

Gajeel found himself glancing over his shoulder to watch her as he fried bacon on the stove. The sound of fat sizzling and popping could be heard over the thick silence hanging over them. Levy hadn't said a word since she'd sat on the couch. She checked the straps of her top once or twice, giving Gajeel a reason to laugh as he cooked, but nothing that warranted conversation.

"Is everything okay?" he asked her, flipping strips of bacon over with a fork. "You're quiet today."

"Just tired," she whispered. He knew she was lying. She had a way of exposing her emotions without so much as looking at him. The air pressing in all around her was enough to give her away.

"You removed the bandage," he said, gesturing with his eyes to her injured hand. He'd noticed it back when he'd found her kneeling in the lobby fumbling for her key, but neglected to say anything about it out of respect for the situation.

"Oh, you noticed that?" she asked, rubbing the back of her head. "I cut myself on a little glass. I wanted to give the wound some air so I took the bandage off when I finished work. I never got around to re-bandaging it. It's okay, though. It's just a little cut."

"You should be careful," he told her. "Little cuts are big cuts on a Shrimp like you."

She rolled her eyes and leaned back against the couch. "Whatever you say."

"My old man didn't have a lot of friends," he said, turning away from her gaze when she looked at him again, "so his funeral will be pretty empty."

Levy frowned. "I'm sorry. I think he'd be happy to know that you were there, though. Friends aren't everything, right?"

Gajeel smiled at that. "Do you want to come with me?"

Sinking into the back of the couch, Levy pulled a cushion over her chest and stared at him without blinking. He couldn't tell if she was contemplating an answer or paralysed with shock.

"Gajeel... I..."

"You don't have to respond right now. I know it's weird, goin' to the funeral of some guy you never even-"

"Why are you asking _me_?"

"Huh? Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, we're not exactly... I was just wondering."

"We're friends, ain't we?" he asked. Wasn't she the one always badgering on at him for being a, what was the word she liked to use when they argued? Recluse? Jerk? Idiot? He'd lost track at this point.

"Oh, so we're friends now? What, because you say so?" she argued, apparently still hurt by his refusal to be her friend before. "Well, whatever the reason, this is a cause for celebration, right? Gajeel Redfox finally admits to having friends. We should take a photo to-"

"On second thought, maybe I'll ask someone else to go with me."

"No! No! I'll go!" she panicked. "Of course I'll go. I'd be honoured to go."

"I was planning on sticking around for a few days when the funeral is over."

"Really?" she asked. "You're going to stay in Oak Town?"

"Yeah," he told her. "I was thinkin', ya know, if you're free, you could do some sight seeing while I figure out what to do with my old man's things. A second pair of hands ain't a bad idea, even if yours are small. Oak Town's a historical place so you'll have plenty to..."

Her smile was so sincere it almost winded him. "I'd love to. I'll ask Mirajane if she can spare me for a few days."

"Lily's coming too," he told her. "Wendy wants to meet him."

Levy laughed at that. "The little girl who sent you cat food?"

"Yeah." He frowned at the memory of Juvia's visit. " _She'll_ be there, too."

Levy didn't have to ask who he meant. He knew just by looking that she'd caught on to his meaning. "I look forward to seeing Juvia again. I have some things to ask her."

Gajeel didn't like the sounds of that, but knew better than to revoke his invitation. Besides, she was his best chance at fulfilling a promise he'd made to someone important. The recollection of such a promise made his skin crawl in trepidation of what may come to pass.

Though still coated in a thick languid haze, he found peace in the light of Levy's brown eyes.

What was it about Levy's face that always filled him with a sense of inner peace? Even with her hair dishevelled and her eyes lidded with fatigue, she was a picture of radiance. Sure, she wasn't like the women he'd seen in magazines. Hell, she wasn't like any woman he'd ever met before. But, then, he hadn't always kept the best company. She was a picture of innocence; her desire, her drive, everything about her made him want to be a better man.

Somehow, just looking at her felt like a sin.

"Gajeel! The bacon!"

Lifting the pan off the stove, Gajeel set it down on a towel beside the sink in a panic. The bacon itself wasn't ruined, but the fat had sizzled itself out of existence. "I hope you like your bacon well done, Shrimp."

Her laughter put him at ease. "I do."

* * *

It was the first time since spring began that Magnolia had been graced with a constant flow of good weather. Three days after Levy agreed to visit his home town had brought nothing but sunshine and a cool but comforting wind. His walks home had been quiet and long, but he'd learned not to ask what she was doing whenever their plans were postponed. It was strange to think he could go to a store, purchase groceries, and then walk home like this without trouble.

Back home, Gajeel couldn't make it ten paces from his doorstep without someone calling his name. Back home, Gajeel wouldn't have been buying groceries in the first place.

 _I can't tell you how to live your life._

"Stubborn Old Witch," he muttered as the voices, _her_ voice, began to shimmer through his mind. It was a whispered echo of what he remembered of the past, a voice that would come and go whenever he found himself feeling the bitter sting of loneliness. Her voice had faded since he left that place and it would continue to do so as time ticked on. Though she'd been a harsh old woman, Gajeel still clung to the guttural rasp of her voice and the expressions she made while scolding him.

 _But please, Gajeel, live a life of meaning._

He could see the apartment complex rising into view, materialising as if summoned by his need to escape the voices. If Levy was trapped in a tunnel of darkness, empty with no means of escape, then he was trapped in a crowded room filled with all the people he'd hurt, their voices filling the darkness with an echo of disapproval and anguish. His tunnel didn't have an end. Gajeel could only walk in circles.

 _You owe yourself that much._

"I owe myself nothing," he growled, willing the voices away.

He stopped dead when he saw a woman standing a little farther ahead of him, face buried in her open hands. Her exposed shoulders trembled as she stood sobbing in the middle of the street. Gajeel recognised the familiar sweep of blue hair pinned up atop her head.

The voice in his mind vanished as quickly as it came, eradicated by his growing sense of apprehension. The bag in his hand hit the ground and then he was gone, racing up the street as though propelled by a force he could not see. He didn't need to look at her face to know it was her. He'd recognise her tiny frame anywhere.

And he knew she was in pain.

Grabbing her shoulder, Gajeel spun her around to face him, surprised by the flush of colour in her cheeks and the shimmer of tears in her bloodshot eyes. She wiped her nose with one hand, the other raised in preparation to defend herself. He caught her fist in midair and with it all the pain she felt came pouring into him.

"I thought you were going to be home late," he said, trying to restrain the incredulous tone in his voice. "Did something happen at work?"

"No." She shook her head. "No, it's nothing like that."

"Levy, what the hell is going on?"

"It's stupid," she whined. "Please, just forget about it."

Gajeel placed a hand on her cheek, his thumb swiping away her tears. Leaning in, he shook his head as if it scold her for even suggesting that her problems were menial. Levy was Levy. She didn't know the meaning of stupid.

"You idiot," he scolded. "What have you been bottling up now? Aren't you the one always goin' on about how it's important to share yer feelings and all that mushy crap?"

"You're going to think I'm so pathetic," she cried. "I can't. I can't tell you. I won't. You've gone through enough. You don't need my problems. Please, Gajeel, stop asking. Just stop it."

"You stubborn girl." He sighed. "Tell me or I'll crack another hole in the wall."

She laughed at that. Leaning her face into his palm, Levy closed her eyes and allowed herself a moment to calm down. "It's just another rejection letter."

"A what?"

"I applied for some jobs. Just, you know, small editing jobs. So why don't..."

"You didn't get a job?" he asked, feeling a little guilty for the waves of relief undulating through him, calming his bloodstream and settling his nerves. "That's it? That's what you're so upset about?"

"That's _it_?" she hiccuped. "See, this is why I didn't want to tell you! You're always like this!"

Gajeel dropped his hand to her chin and forced her to look at him. "Can't you just apply for another one?"

"Stupid Gajeel," she squeaked. "You're so stupid. So, so stupid."

He didn't need her to tell him that.

"Why doesn't anybody want me?" she cried. "Why am I never the first choice? Why am I so useless? Nobody will ever hire me like this. I'm going to be stuck in that apartment for the rest of my life. Lucy is going to be a best selling author and I'm going to be stuck here with nothing. Why doesn't anybody want me, Gajeel? Why? Why am I-"

With a hand on the back of her head, Gajeel pulled her against his chest where she proceeded to sob uncontrollably. She grabbed at his shirt with both hands, her body shaking with the sudden onslaught of tears.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

He knew now why she always had such a serious expression on her face. Levy McGarden was her own worst enemy. She didn't see her own worth. She didn't see how she impacted the lives of others.

How she affected him.

"You listen to me," he implored, cupping her face in his hands, "an' listen well, Little Girl. I don't intend to repeat myself."

She nodded as best she could in the vice-like grip of his hands.

"You're small and you're annoying and you're stubborn and you hold everything in until you cry like this in the street. You're a terrible liar and you stammer a lot when you're excited. You're an absolute pain in my ass. I'm only going to tell you this once, so you'd sure as hell better pay close attention. You're not allowed to stand there an' feel sorry for yourself. You had a pleasant upbringing. You went to school. You have all those books and those friends and those memories. I've never been wanted. And I've never had friends. So you'll excuse me if I don't feel sorry for you, Levy. Standin' here crying ain't going to make you a successful editor and it sure as hell ain't going to bring your parents back."

"Stop it," she whimpered. "I hate you, Stupid Gajeel."

"Good!" he barked. "Go ahead and hate me if you want. Become another notch in my belt, I don't care. It just means that what I'm saying is actually reaching you. Nobody likes to hear the truth but I'd rather be honest and brash than blindly loyal to a lie for the sake of someone else's happiness."

The honesty in his words seemed to cut through her at every angle. She was shaking uncontrollably in his hands, but there was something in her eyes that told him he'd done the right thing. She'd been coddled all her life. Treated like a snowflake in summer. Fragile and dainty and vulnerable. She didn't know her own strengths because she'd never had to use them. Not really. She'd always had someone else there to hold her hand and to tell her she was going to be okay.

"Gajeel, I-"

"Shut up and listen!" he yelled, shocking her into silence. "Because so help me, Levy McGarden, I _will_ make you big."

"Gajeel..." She buried her face against his chest when he finally released her.

"Belno would've liked you," he mumbled into her hair. "Stubborn girl."

"Did you say something?" she rasped.

Gajeel shook his head and held her tight against him. "No. Nothing."

* * *

"I'm really sorry about earlier. I don't know what came over me."

Gajeel took the mug from her hand and wiped it dry before setting it on the pile of dishes accumulating on the draining board. Levy took a second mug and dunked it into the sink, refusing to look at him as she washed it thoroughly with the cloth.

When she'd asked to do the dishes he'd been quick to take her up on the offer, if only to make her feel useful for the evening. She'd had enough rejection for one day. Hell, even Gajeel knew when to call it quits on the teasing.

"You feelin' better now?" he asked.

"Mhm," she said with a nod. "Much better. Thank you. I forget how much of a brat I can be sometimes. I'm sorry."

"If you apologise one more time I'm going to dunk you in the sink with that mug," he admonished.

She withdrew her hands from the sink and very quickly, very accurately, slapped a handful of bubbles across his face. Gajeel sneezed out the scent of washing up liquid before cupping a handful of water and countering her attack. She let out a laugh and set off running through his apartment, Lily galloping at her side in an attempt at joining in on their game.

"Get back here you little runt!" he yelled, chasing her around the couch until, suddenly, she was face planting the carpet and he was on his back beside her rolling and howling with laughter. Fighting to catch his breath, Gajeel rolled onto his stomach in an attempt at stifling his laughter.

"Damn it, Shrimp," he snorted. "That was impressive! So even you can make that much racket when you fall over."

"Don't laugh at me," she groaned.

"I can't help it," he howled.

For a moment, the only laughter Gajeel could hear was his own.

The faint sound of distant strumming sucked the amusement right out of his body. She wasn't laughing anymore because she was already on the move.

Climbing to his feet, Gajeel snatched the guitar from her hands before she could even blink.

"No fair!" she gasped. "Finders keepers!"

Gajeel rolled his eyes. "Keep yer hands off, Shrimp. Where did you even find this, anyway?"

"I saw it when we were running around the couch," she admitted. Levy eased back on her heels, fingers laced together on the small of her back. She looked suspiciously calm. "Play for me."

"What?"

"Play something," she implored. "Please."

"Hell no!" He was about to slip the guitar behind the couch when she grabbed a fistful of his shirt. Fixing his gaze on hers, Gajeel wondered if she knew just what kind of trouble she was getting herself into. One wrong move and he'd have her begging for mercy.

"Okay," she started, batting her eyelashes at him in a way that made his blood run cold. "Well, since you don't want to play a song for me, I guess we can always just talk about what you said on the street."

The lump in his throat swelled to the size of a fist. "Huh?"

"'I'll make you big'," she said in a voice still too sweet to be masculine, but deep enough that it made him shiver, "'Levy McGarden'."

"All right, all right! Shut up! I'll play you a damn song!"

She seemed pleased with herself. Too pleased. "I'm so glad!"

Sitting on the arm of the couch, Gajeel waited as she took a seat on the ground, Lily curling up in her lap when he sensed a change in the atmosphere. It was from this height that Gajeel found the opportunity to get a better look at her. She'd changed her hair, he noticed, as he readied the guitar in his hands. It was unusual for her to wear it up like that. She looked a little older than usual with it pinned up in such a manner on top of her head. She wasn't wearing a dress today, either. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her wear shorts, if at all. Had her legs always been so slender?

"Gajeel?" she asked, prompting him to strum a panicked note.

"You can't rush genius, Shrimp," he said, barely able to form a sentence as he freed his gaze from hers. Stupid little Shrimp with her soft looking skin and stupid shiny hair. "You ready?"

She nodded but didn't say anything as he started to strum. Her expression remained serious the entire time, giving him no room to gauge her thoughts. He wondered if she could sense how nervous he was. Not even Gajeel could remember the last time his heart had pounded in such a way. To say he enjoyed playing the guitar would be an understatement. Playing it for her, however, sent him soaring to new heights of adrenaline and joy.

When he finally found the strength to look at her again, Gajeel's fingers froze in place. "Shit, why're you crying?"

"I don't know," she confessed, wiping a tear from her cheek. "You're so bad at this that I was moved to tears by your efforts."

Gajeel flinched. "What did you just say?!"

Levy broke into a fit of laughter. "I'm joking! I'm joking!"

"That does it, Brat." Laying the guitar on the couch, Gajeel sprang into action. She didn't wait around for him to attack, instead clambering to her feet, Lily sprinting on ahead of her, and racing to dive on his bed. He skidded to a halt when he reached her, if only because she looked so damn little curled up on his bed like that.

"That's the last time I play music for you," he huffed, folding his arms over his chest.

Levy rolled onto her back and let the upper half of her body dangle off the end of the bed towards the ground. She stared up at him from her peculiar position, giving him a smile that looked even more menacing upside down.

"I'm sorry," she said. "Please play me another song."

"What's with that? Like hell I'm going to play you another song."

"Then," she started, rolling onto her stomach to finish her sentence, "teach me how to play?"

"What?"

"Please."

"Hell no!"

"Pleaaaasssseeeeee."

"Listen here, Shrimp, I don't owe you a damn-"

"What if learning to play the guitar will help 'make me big'?" she interrupted. "Hey, what does that even mean, anyway?"

Gajeel snarled. "You're the vocabulary addict. You figure it out."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she sang, climbing off the bed to approach him. "I won't tease you about it again, I swear. Actually, I'm really grateful for everything you..."

"Five minutes," he acquiesced. "That's all."

Her eyes lit up when she smiled. "Really?"

"Four minutes and fifty-nine seconds."

"Okay! Okay!"

"Sit down and pay attention. I'm only explaining things once."

"I got it," she said, rushing to take a place on the couch. "Take me away, Teacher. I'm all yours."

Gajeel shuddered. "Keep yappin' and I'll revoke a minute from your schedule."

"Sorry, sorry," she yielded. "Go ahead. I'm all ears."

Those measly five minutes seemed to last him a lifetime.

* * *

 _If you're interested in character back stories and events that are brushed over but not described then check out No Peeking!: Anamnesis, a new title of oneshots that all fall into the No Peeking! verse and timeline. One story has been posted already detailing Levy's first experience grocery shopping with Gajeel. The stories will feature different characters and experiences, all rated individually. So keep an eye on that for updates. You can also suggest side stories should something in the main story arouse your interest. :)_

 _Also surprise - this isn't the only chapter I uploaded today! Be sure to check out Chapter 8, which was posted mere moments after this one. :D_


	8. Adjudication

A/N: Surprise! This week is a double update! You get _two_ chapters this week! I wanted to do something to say thank you for all the encouragement and the follows and, well, everything else. You're all amazing. Thank you so much. ^^

* * *

 **Chapter Eight: Adjudication**

* * *

 _Would you call me a Saint or a Sinner? Would you love me a loser or a winner?  
When I see my face in the mirror, we look so alike that it makes me shiver.  
I still look for your face in the crowd; oh if you could see me now.  
Would you stand in disgrace or take a bow? Oh, if you could see me now._

* * *

"I still think you should've brought it," Levy admonished, flicking one leg over the other as she leaned back in her seat. "I've gotten used to hearing you play at night. What if I can't sleep without it?"

Gajeel would have offered some form of scathing remark were it not for the nausea broiling away in the pit of his stomach. He leaned against the empty seat in front, swallowing his need to vomit as the train rattled its way towards yet another destination that wasn't his. The torture of pulling into station after station was enough to keep his head down and his eyes on Levy's feet, which were a much prettier sight than his dull grey sneakers. He'd have commented on the size difference were he feeling up to it.

"Is your motion sickness really that bad?" she asked, caressing his back in an attempt at easing the problem. "I would've never guessed."

"Shrimp," he groaned, trying to keep his annoyance in check, "you haven't stopped talking since we boarded this damn train. I wish I _had_ brought my guitar just so I could _hit_ you with it."

"Sorry," she said, withdrawing her hand. "I just, well, I'm nervous."

"About _what_? It ain't like my old man is going to leap out of his coffin to greet you," he said. "I'm the one who should be nervous. He's probably waitin' to rub his ghostly hands all over me. I'll be haunted for the rest of my life with the smell of burnt pizza and the constant rattle of change in his pockets."

Levy huffed her disapproval. "You're the one who asked me to come along, you know."

"I know." He sighed. "I didn't know you were going to be so damn annoying, though."

Gajeel found temporary relief when the train stopped to let a number of passengers on and off. It was during this time that he found the strength to sit back in his seat and gaze off into the carriage. Passengers in the row of paired seats to his right were sitting in the opposite direction. He couldn't imagine riding the train backwards. Forwards was bad enough.

He'd chosen to sit closest to the aisle, leaving her the view from the window to his left. He couldn't stand the blur of colour and buildings and landscape as the train rushed on by. It was a constant reminder that the ground was moving beneath him and that he was no closer to making it stop.

"You know, I've been meaning to ask-"

"What is it now?" he interrupted, pressing a hand over his upset stomach. "Just spit it out."

"It's just, earlier, you said _we_ will book into a hotel before the funeral."

"Yeah, so?"

"Well, I mean, what about your house?"

"My house?"

"Yeah, you know, where you used to live. Why aren't you staying there?"

Gajeel snorted. "That ain't my house any more. I have my reasons."

Levy placed a hand on his arm. "If there's anything you want to talk about, I'm here."

"I know you're here," he said. "Everyone on the damn train knows you're here."

"I'm sorry for being such a nuisance," she snapped. "I'll just-"

The train lurched forward, the wheels screeching under the weight of the carriage. Nausea sluiced through his stomach and rippled up into his throat. The burning taste of acid made him heave for a breath that wouldn't come.

Vomiting on the train wouldn't have been so bad: You know, if he hadn't done it on her shoes.

* * *

"I can't believe you threw up on my shoes," Levy said, for about the tenth time since arriving in Oak Town. "My ankles are killing me already."

"Quit complaining," he snapped, hoisting their bags higher above his head. The stairwell in the hotel reminded him a little too much of their apartment building back in Magnolia Town. "You had another pair of shoes in your bag, didn't you? What's the problem?"

"I can't travel around Oak Town in a pair of heels, Gajeel," she said, pointing adamantly at her trembling ankles.

"Then I'll just have to carry you," he muttered, offering very little sympathy as they arrived at the designated floor. "Hurry up and open the door. Your bag's heavy enough to hold a thousand pairs of shoes."

"I'm still not sure about this," Levy said, avoiding his comment about her shoes. "I mean, is it really okay to share a room?"

"You wanna fork out another hundred jewels for a second one?"

"No sir," she conceded, unlocking the door and swinging it open.

Dropping their bags near the entrance, Gajeel turned to find an ashen Levy standing quietly in the doorway. Her eyes were trained on the queen sized bed across the room. Gajeel noted the lack of chocolate on the pillows before realising the problem, which in turn sent a shimmer of dread tingling up his spine.

"Gajeel!" Levy gasped. "There's only one bed!"

"Look, it doesn't matter," he said, gesturing to the small couch in front of the window. "I can sleep over there."

"But I'd feel bad about that," she commented.

"You'd rather I sleep in the bed with you?" he remarked, dabbing his tongue against the corner of his mouth. "I didn't know you were like that, Shrimp."

"Shut. Up." she protested, kicking off her heels. "You have no right to tease me after you threw up all over my shoes."

He couldn't help but laugh as he watched her struggle through her bags, unload the ruined shoes she'd stuffed inside an old gym bag, and then disappear into the bathroom. Part of him hoped she couldn't get her shoes clean. He rather liked Levy in heels. Or, rather, he liked her _legs_. Levy in heels was like a bomb waiting to explode. He could only imagine what she'd be like if they were bigger. He caught himself thinking about her legs one last time before the suspense of their trip began to seep in. He wasn't here to tease Levy about her heels - or to admire her soft, slender legs.

His father hadn't given a guest list for the funeral - no invites, no rejections: Nothing. It was unsettling to know that just anyone could waltz into the building. Gajeel knew he had no right to turn people away, though; even if those people hated him. He could handle a scuffle here and there. Hell, he could handle an all out brawl if it came down to it. But not with Levy sitting right next to him, wishing peace for a man she'd never met. Gajeel didn't want her to see him like that - to see the ugly truth festering deep inside him.

Levy's voice pulled him back to reality. "It's no use. They're ruined."

"Good," he snickered. "It'll serve you right for talkin' the whole way here."

" _Excuse me_ for trying to save you from your thoughts," she said, fists on her hips. "Would you rather we sit in silence?"

"I don't need saving from my thoughts," he complained. "I need saving from you."

Inflating her cheeks, Levy took a quick scan of the room before striding over to prod his chest with her fingertip. "I'm going to let you off just this once, Gajeel Redfox."

"What an honour," he said, the sarcasm dripping wet in his voice. "I'm so grateful that I could cry."

"Don't cry so much that you vomit again," she goaded.

Gajeel seized her wrist in his arm and held it high above her head, high enough that she was forced up onto her tiptoes. "Careful what you say, Little Girl. No one can hear you scream all the way out here."

Levy shivered. "I got it. I got it. I'll behave. How long do we have until the funeral starts? Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No." He shrugged. "We just have to show up an hour in advance, as planned."

"Really? That's it?"

He knew why she was confused. Lucy Heartfilia's parents must've had a grand old send off with all their money and treasures and friends. "Yeah, that's it."

"Um, Gajeel, I'm sorry about-"

"I know," he whispered, placing a comforting hand on her head. "Thanks for being here, Shrimp."

"Right..."

When they arrived at the venue - the remains of a castle erected high in the woodlands of Oak Town - Wendy was the first person to greet them. She and Levy hit it off immediately, the two of them getting lost in a conversation about Wendy's favourite books. Gajeel felt like Levy could engage anyone in a conversation about books - even his old man, who scarcely ever picked up a piece of fiction. Though, knowing her, she'd amassed enough knowledge of foreign places to lure even Metalicana into an hour long tangent.

An assortment of chairs stood on either side of him, a short but fair distance from the empty coffin at the front of the room. Empty, because his father's body had never actually been found. It was as though he'd simply disappeared, just like always did. A fitting demise, he thought, for a man who liked to vanish without a word. That in mind, Gajeel thought the concept of a funeral was actually quite stupid.

He'd said goodbye a long, long time ago.

With greetings out of the way, Wendy turned her attention on Gajeel. "Where is he, then?"

Gajeel flicked a pleading glance in Levy's direction. "Who?"

"Pantherlily," Wendy pressed. "You said you'd bring him."

"Yeah, about that, we decided to leave him with Levy's friend."

" _We_?" Levy asked. "Don't let him fool you, Wendy. It was all his idea. He said he wouldn't be able to concentrate if he was worrying about Lily the whole time."

"It's okay," she said, glancing between them with a smile that made Gajeel's stomach relive their morning train journey. "I understand."

"I-it's not like that," Levy stammered.

"Where's Grandeeney, anyway?" Gajeel asked, deflecting the subject to avoid any unnecessary problems. "I was looking forward to seein' the Old Hag."

Wendy frowned. "She's not going to make it. There was an incident at the hospital and-"

"Hospital?" Levy asked.

"Wendy's training to be a nurse," Gajeel explained, squeezing Wendy's shoulder with a tingling sense of pride.

"Not exactly," Wendy insisted, a flush of warmth tinting her cheeks. "I just help out. For now, anyway."

"And this woman is your mother?" Levy asked.

"Yep!" Wendy beamed. "Grandeeney has been my guardian for as long as I can remember."

"I wouldn't be smiling if she was my mother," Gajeel scoffed. Of course, Grandeeney wasn't Wendy's biological mother, but that didn't change how close they'd become. As far as Wendy was concerned, she and Grandeeney had always been together. Gajeel wondered how that felt - to feel close to someone in that way. To feel protected.

"Gajeel!" A pair of arms wrapped around his waist from behind, reminding him to be on guard during the service. "Juvia was so worried when you wouldn't answer her calls. I'm so sorry about-"

"It's fine," he said, prying her arms from his waist. "How have you been, Juvia?"

"I've been well. Actually, I..." Juvia paused when she saw Levy for the first time. "Gajeel! Did you and your cute neighbour finally start a rel-"

Gajeel smacked a hand over her mouth. "A funeral ain't no time for you to start spoutin' nonsense!"

"Speaking of nonsense," Levy chimed in, placing a hand on Juvia's arm, "I see you didn't bring Gray with you. How are things going with him?"

"Gray and Juvia are going on our Honeymoon soon," she chirped.

"Honeymoon?!" Levy gasped.

Gajeel snorted.

"Actually," Wendy started, taking a seat near the aisle, "Gray has gone to visit his family, so Juvia has been staying at my house for a while."

Juvia inflated her cheeks at the desecration of her fantasy. "He left Juvia all alone."

"He'll be back soon," Levy promised. "Gray is just like that. He would skip classes sometimes to check in on things at home. He's very family-orientated."

"Love rival!" Juvia yelled, a new kind of energy dancing in her eyes.

"I am _not_!" Levy insisted. "I don't like Gray like that!"

"She's right," Wendy agreed, cheeks tinted pink as she glanced between the group. "Levy likes boys with long hair and piercings."

"When did you start acting so damn bold?" Gajeel chided, mussing Wendy's hair with one hand. "You used to be quiet. What happened?"

Wendy grinned. "Chelia has been helping me overcome my fears."

"It's nice to have a friend who helps you overcome your worries," Levy said in agreement. "Like, for example, the other day, Gajeel went out of his way to-"

Gajeel forced Levy into a nearby seat and silenced her with the palm of his hand. "You should rest your damn mouth once in a while, Shrimp. Don't wanna lose your voice, do you?"

"Do you think anyone else will come to the ceremony?" Wendy asked, leaning against the arm of her seat. Gajeel noticed for the first time that her hair had gotten longer, and the shade of blue was much deeper than Levy's.

"I'm sure they will," Juvia said, taking the seat beside her. "It would be nice if Papa Metalicana could get a proper send off."

Gajeel grit his teeth. "Yeah. Right."

When the service finally commenced, Gajeel barely heard a word that was said. A few stragglers walked into the building during the opening speech. His father's drinking buddies were among them, some of them drunk before arriving, others sneaking a gulp from a flask when they thought he wasn't looking. He didn't care what they did, so long as they kept their filthy habits to themselves. Everyone had a right to grieve in their own way, even Gajeel could respect that.

Levy's hand reached out for his across the arm of Gajeel's seat. She used the other to wipe a stream of tears from her cheeks, which blazed red in the afternoon light. He'd never felt so fragile in his entire life. The mere sound of her mourning was enough to bring him on the verge of tears. He made an attempt to swallow the lump in his throat - and all of his sorrows with it. The extent of loss pierced through him like shadows in a poorly lit hallway. Whatever attempt he'd been making at keeping it together was suddenly cast aside with that light.

Metalicana was gone.

Gajeel was never going to see his old man again. All those years he'd spent sitting by the window had gone to waste; all those years of waiting and wondering and fighting. He realised now that he'd been in denial for the past week. He'd gotten so used to Metalicana postponing his journey home, so used to hearing apologies and goodbyes, that Gajeel had yet to realise the finality of this one. His father wasn't coming back. Gajeel wouldn't get the chance to yell at him. He wouldn't get the chance to blame him for all the shit he'd been through.

He'd never get to admit just how much he loved him.

Gajeel stiffened when tears finally spilled onto his cheeks. There wasn't much he could do to stop them, so he made no attempts to do so. Levy's warmth dulled the ache, but not enough to end the stabbing pain in his heart. Gajeel couldn't bring himself to face the coffin at the front of the room. He'd told himself that, without a body, the service would be easy. He realised now that that was a mistake. Nothing could change Metalicana's fate.

He was gone. Forever.

* * *

"I'm gonna go get some air," Gajeel said, leaving Levy to hear many more of Juvia's stories. At least, he'd _thought_ he was leaving her behind. Her heels clattered against the stone floor as she followed him out into the open woods.

The air tasted like poison.

"Gajeel..."

"What is it?" he asked. "Sick of hearing stories already?"

"Not at all," Levy insisted, offering him a reassuring smile. "Your father was a very interesting man."

"He was." Gajeel shrugged. "Doesn't mean much to me, though."

"I wish I could've met him."

"He would've liked you," Gajeel told her. "He had a thing for small women."

Levy smacked his arm. "Don't be facetious."

"Fa- _what_?"

"Sarcastic," she explained. "You're being rude."

"Why didn't you just say that?" he asked.

"Ugh, never mind," she groaned, barely able to retain a scowl under the weight of his lingering gaze. "Oak Town is a really beautiful place. I can't wait to do some exploring of my own tomorrow, if these shoes will let me."

"It used to be beautiful," he corrected. "A long time ago."

"Used to be? But it's still really-"

"I told you the funeral was today," a voice said through the wall of surrounding trees. "The rumours were true after all."

Gajeel took a defensive step towards Levy and ushered her back towards the building.

"How could you leave us, Gajeel?" a second voice cried. "Such a sorrowful departure without a single word of goodbye!"

"What do you want, Aria?" Gajeel asked, reaching a protective arm across Levy's front.

"Master Jose said we should offer our condolences," the first voice said.

"Go back inside, Levy," Gajeel said, watching for movement in the trees. "I won't be long."

"What? Why?" she asked, trying to see who lie in wait beyond the trees.

"Just do as I say!"

"Is that any way to talk to your girlfriend?" a third voice asked. "Do you have no honour, Black Steel?"

"She ain't my girlfriend," Gajeel hissed. "What do you want?"

Levy gasped when three figures emerged from the woodlands. The largest of the three bowed his head in greeting, tears streaming down his cheeks. "It has been too long, Gajeel."

" _Salut_ , old friend," the second added in a thick accent, sweeping green hair back from his face as he approached.

"We're not friends, Sol," Gajeel growled.

"Come now," the third started, fingering the folds of his robe with one hand. "Is that any way to talk to your old friends?"

"We were never friends, Totomaru. I worked alone."

"How could you, Gajeel?" Aria sobbed. "How could you leave us?"

"And take Mademoiselle Juvia with you, no less," Sol added.

"I didn't take Juvia anywhere," Gajeel snapped. "She does whatever she wants to. Ain't my fault she lost interest in you morons."

"Maybe we should take your girlfriend as consolation," Totomaru threatened. "We have the advantage." He made the effort of showing the hilt of his knife for effect. "Weapons always beat fists."

"Touch her and the last thing you'll see is my fist," Gajeel spat.

"How rude," Sol remarked. "And after we made the effort of coming out here to console you. I'm hurt."

"Quit bein' facetious!" Gajeel snapped.

"Facetious?" Totomaru chortled. "That's an awfully big word for you, Gajeel."

"Funerals are so sad!" Aria bawled, wiping an arm over his face. The big brute had been a crybaby for as long as Gajeel could remember, often mourning the victims of fights he, himself, had started. Some things would never change, apparently.

"I'm surprised you came," Totomaru said, blowing strands of dark hair off his face. "You didn't even say goodbye to Belno after you so callously ended her life. I expected the same of your father. It _is_ your fault, isn't it? You're the one who kept demanding he come home."

"It's not his fault!" Levy screamed.

Like a bullet emerging from the barrel of a gun, Gajeel soared the distance between them in an instant. The sensation of his fist connecting with Totomaru's face ignited his thirst for vengeance. All his hatred, all his anger, came bubbling to the surface in the momentum of his fist. Levy's screams drowned in his aching need to silence the voices in his head. If he couldn't erase the past, he would erase the threat.

The high-pitched ringing in his ears stopped when a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. He could hear Levy screaming, but her voice felt so far away. So empty. He lurched back to throw her off him, but the sound of her crying dragged him from the depths of his anarchy, if only for a moment. He held his fist above Totomaru's bloodied face.

"Stop it!" she screamed, reaching for him once again. "You're better than this, Gajeel!"

Anger gripped him tight in its fist, squeezing the breath from his lungs. Gajeel threw his elbow back against her face, inadvertently knocking Levy to the ground. Losing Levy's voice to his anger, he froze when Totomaru pressed the hilt of his knife against Gajeel's chest.

"You're lucky it's not my blade," he goaded, "or you'd be dead right now."

"Stop it! Please!" The strain in Levy's voice connected with Gajeel's heart when she reached out for him a second time. He went limp in her arms and allowed himself to be dragged onto the ground beside her. She pulled his head onto her lap, where he gazed up at the treetops with tears in his eyes. The empty sky seemed to mock him through the canopy of leaves overhead.

"You're Phantom Lord, aren't you?" Levy asked the three of them. "What do you want from Gajeel?"

"She's too smart for you, Gajeel," Totomaru spluttered, spitting blood when he found the strength to stand. "Actually, we came to say goodbye."

Gajeel craned his neck and caught a glimpse of Aria's face in the distance. "You call this a goodbye?"

"Master Jose passed away," Aria sobbed. "You were supposed to become leader. It was his dying wish."

Jose was nothing but a bully. Gajeel would rather spit on his grave than answer to his dying wish. "Get someone else to do it, I qu-"

"No, no, no," Sol interjected. "There is nothing for you to quit: We chose to disband. If we cannot fulfil our master's wishes then we would rather do nothing than dishonour him."

The sensation of Levy's hands combing through his hair reminded Gajeel that she was there, listening, observing - judging.

"Gajeel! Levy!" Juvia's voice echoed in the shadow of her approaching footsteps. "What are you three doing?! You promised to let him be!"

"Juvia," Aria sobbed, "we just came to say goodbye."

Gajeel could see Juvia standing over him with fists clenched at her sides. "Phantom Lord ends with Jose," she said. "Please, let Gajeel live on with the people he loves. It's not his fault. We're not children any more. Juvia is tired of always standing in the rain waiting for someone to help her. That's why this has to stop. Hate only breeds more hate."

"It's true, then," Levy whispered, her tears catching his cheeks as they fell to the ground. "You really are a member of Phantom Lord. Both of you."

"Levy." Juvia bent to grab Levy's shoulders. "Please, let Juvia explain."

"I don't want an explanation," she snapped. "There's nothing you can say to change the facts."

"Stubborn girl," Gajeel muttered.

"You think you can just disband a horrible group like Phantom Lord because your leader dies? That everything you've done will just go away with his death? You think you can ruin people's lives and then just take it all back?!" Levy made an effort to hold each of them in her gaze for a painful, fleeting moment. "Phantom Lord will always exist because you made it so! I don't want to hear an explanation or excuses! I don't want to know why you did it. What happened in the past can't be changed. It's what you do now that shapes who you are!"

Gajeel was paralysed by the resounding promise in her words. The promise of hope. The promise that, with acceptance, with love, even _he_ was free of adjudication. He could wear the burdens of his past, he could atone, as long as he didn't forget. As long as he made the effort to change.

"It's your punishment to live on with those memories and to grieve for what you did." Levy gasped a sob. "I don't care why any of you joined Phantom Lord. I don't care who's to blame for orchestrating all the terrible things that happened. I'm not even interested in what those things were. But when you come here to someone's funeral and pick a fight, you insult everyone who came here to mourn."

"Levy..." Juvia was at a loss for words. At least she could find her voice long enough to forget them. Gajeel could only lay there like an abandoned lump of steel.

"It's not our place to explain things to you, nor did we ever intend to," Totomaru said. "Gajeel Redfox has two faces. You'd better learn to tell them apart, if you ever want the answers you seek."

"We will move forward with our guilt," Aria said. "Juvia leaving the group reminded us that we're not trapped in one place, like we thought. Even rocks that plummet into a deep, dark ocean have the opportunity to be washed ashore again."

"Though it looks like escape for you is futile after all," Totomaru coaxed, wiping the blood from his face. "You'll always be Black Steel Gajeel, the man who thinks with his iron fist."

"I don't care what you think," Gajeel barked.

"Then why didn't you invite us to the funeral?" Totomaru asked. "The sooner you accept your past, the sooner you can move on with your life. It seems you're the only one stuck in the ways of the past, clawing at the possibility of turmoil. You'll never find peace because you'll never accept yourself. That's what I came here to say. Consider it a parting gift, along with the end of our friendship."

"We were never friends," Gajeel said, again. "An' I didn't ask you to say anything. Get lost."

Aria stifled a laugh through his tears. "Take care, Gajeel."

He couldn't tell if his reunion with those three had been underwhelming, or if he was just dizzy from the stress of his day. Either way, Gajeel couldn't muster so much as a goodbye. He knew it wasn't the end. It never was. Even if they never physically approached him again, memories of them would. He was haunted by this thing they called friendship. By all the terrible things they had done.

"Stupid Gajeel," Levy hiccuped.

"Gajeel," Wendy's voice was like a gentle wind sweeping in through the treetops, "just hold on, I'm going to check your injuries. Mother is on her way, too."

"What's up with that?" Gajeel laughed. "I don't even have any injuries."

"No," Juvia gasped, turning to look at Levy, " _you_ don't."

Gajeel's heart sank when he saw the rivulet of blood dripping from the end of Levy's nose.

* * *

"Are you just going to ignore me for the rest of the night?" she asked from the end of the queen sized bed. "You haven't said a word since your fight."

Gajeel drew his heels back against the couch and buried his head in his palms. He couldn't even stomach the sight of her anymore, couldn't stand to see her face after what he'd done.

"It's really not that bad," she insisted. "It only hurts a little bit. And Grandeeny said it isn't broken, so there's really nothing to get so upset about."

Gajeel glanced up from his hands to get a second look at her face. His stomach churned with the remains of guilt left to fester in his silence. Her face was bruised from the impact of his elbow. Her knees, too, had the remnants of scrapes from her fall.

"Why are you still here?" he asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You heard what was said, didn't you?"

Levy's smile softened. "Today is about mourning your father. Tomorrow, we can mourn Black Steel. Together."

Gajeel winced at the sound of his nickname on her lips. "And how are we going to do that?"

"Tomorrow," she said, leaping off the bed to approach him, "you're going to tell me _everything_ ,starting with how you joined Phantom Lord and ending with the woman you supposedly killed."

Gajeel lowered his head. "It's true, you know. I killed her."

Levy crouched to sit on the ground at his feet. "See, I don't think that's true."

"You don't get to decide if it's true or not," he hissed.

"I can always tell when you're lying," she reminded him. "You didn't kill that woman. Not in a literal sense, at least. I think you blame yourself for whatever happened to her and it's that guilt that drove you away."

Gajeel's eyes widened.

"You sure took your rebellious phase to a whole new level, Gajeel. Whatever happened to just dying your hair or sneaking out after curfew?"

"I'll tell you about Black Steel Gajeel," he promised. "Tomorrow, when today is just another memory."

"I'm not going to apologise for stopping your fight - or for saying what I did," Levy told him. "So, don't apologise for the way you reacted. It was an accident. Let's just pretend that tonight never even happened."

"Are you afraid?" he asked, stupefied by the weight of sincerity, of honesty, that emerged in her deep brown eyes.

She considered her answer for some time, giving him a moment to revel in the quiet thump of blood pulsing through his body. It was a reminder that he was still breathing. That he was alive. It was the sound of a new beginning, emanating sorrowfully through the rhythmic beating of his own heart. He knew she couldn't hear it, but the sound of it made him feel truly exposed for the first time.

"No," she confessed. "I'm not scared at all."


	9. The Truth Is

**A/N:** This chapter was planned to be really sad and emotional and in the end Levy kinda dragged me where she wanted to go. Hahaha.

* * *

 **Chapter Nine: The Truth Is**

* * *

 _I'm trying to look behind your eyes, I've been trying to read between unspoken lines.  
We keep dancing 'round and we don't know what's real.  
Can't let the music end before we can find a way to say the things we feel.  
The truth is that I love you..._

* * *

Levy woke to a thick haze of sleep pressing in all around her like a ghost striving for possession. She'd have let it win, were it not for the distant streamers of sunlight peering in through the half-drawn curtains. The glimmer of morning reminded her that there was something she needed to do. Something important.

Levy couldn't recall ever feeling so heavy, like her body weighed more than her soul could manage. Her feet still throbbed from the day before. Stretching her arms above her head, Levy yawned as she rolled towards the middle of the bed. Though she couldn't remember falling asleep, Levy recalled embracing the comfort of the large mattress and the soft texture of the blankets. It had been easy to fall asleep without the constant echo of neighbours yelling out into the dead of night.

"Morning, Shorty."

Levy's eyes snapped open to find Gajeel staring at her from the next pillow. "What are you doing?!"

"Can you keep it down?" he growled, pulling the blankets over his face.

Levy squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, hoping to erase the man laying beside her. When rubbing her eyes didn't work, she took to more practical matters. Groping her hand across the bed between them, she rolled the backs of her fingers over the mattress until they reached something beneath the blankets. Gajeel let out an audible groan when she laid her hands on something firm under the sheets. It didn't feel like muscle, nor did it feel like bone. Trailing a finger over the length of it, Levy scrunched up her face in confusion.

And then it twitched.

Letting out a scream, Levy threw herself back and out of the bed, barely able to catch her breath as she tumbled onto the ground. Drawing her knees to her chest, she shuffled back until she hit a set of drawers beside the bed. Her back hurt from the impact, but it was better than staying in bed. Anything was better than staying in bed after what she'd just done.

"Well, I'm definitely awake now," he grumbled, sitting up in the bed to rub his eyes. "You always fondle men first thing in a morning?"

Levy could feel the blood pounding away in her cheeks, radiating heat in waves that made her eyes sting with tears. Gajeel glanced away to mask his own embarrassment, which tinted his face a very noticeable red. The silence between them was deafening, but neither seemed ready to mention the topic again. Of all the places to grab, why did it have to be something so intimate?

"What were you doing in the bed?!" she cried.

"You invited me," he said, raising a brow as if to question her sanity. "You don't remember?"

No, she didn't. "Impossible. There's no way I invited you."

Levy couldn't help but stare as he flexed his arms over his head. They were so big and perfect, tanned skin wrapped around muscles that were probably bigger than her face. She'd never had a "type" before, but if she had to choose, it would probably be someone like him. Even the piercings had a certain something about them, something that made her stomach tingle with butterflies all beating their wings out of time.

Everything about Gajeel was big, apparently.

 _Wait, what was she thinking?_

"It was the middle of the night," he said, interrupting Levy's inappropriate train of thought. "You said you were cold."

"I... I did?" _Oh no_. She must've been sleep-talking. Lucy had always been the one to snuggle up to Levy in the night. She'd never expected Gajeel to fall victim to her sleeping woes. "S-stupid Gajeel! Learn to tell when a woman is awake or not! You should have refused!"

Gajeel threw his head back to laugh. "Don't worry."

"How can I not worry?! I don't even remember-"

"Nothing happened. Why would I wanna take advantage of someone with such a small chest? Maybe in a few years if you grow a few inches."

Levy wrapped her arms around her chest. "You jerk!"

"Be careful," he warned. "You don't want to strain your injuries."

"Ah, that's right..." Glancing down at her legs, Levy's mind rushed back to the incident after the funeral. The cuts and bruises were going to be a pain. "Oh! There's no time to waste!"

Gajeel raised a brow suspiciously. "What're you yappin' on about?"

Climbing to her feet, Levy snatched his shirt from the arm of the couch and slung it at him as she raced by. "Hurry! Hurry! We have to get ready!"

"What the hell are you so excited about?"

Pausing in the bathroom doorway, Levy swung against the door frame to get one final look at him. "We're going on a date, aren't we?"

"Like hell we are," he snapped. "Why would I go on a date with someone who gropes people first thing in the morning?"

"You promised you'd tell me everything!" she reminded him, ignoring his comment and slamming the door closed behind herself.

"You don't have to act so happy about it," he said in quiet admission. "Stupid girl."

Levy turned to face her reflection in the mirror. Her hair stood out in a multitude of directions, adding further to the embarrassment of the morning.

This was it - the moment she'd been waiting for. Gajeel's past. Gajeel's future. Time itself was about to intertwine. She was about to learn the truth.

"I'm not afraid," she told herself. "I'm not afraid at all."

* * *

"Awwwwwwww! You look so good with short hair, Gajeel," Levy teased, admiring the collection of photographs still hanging on the living room wall.

She stood in Gajeel's forsaken home - though much emptier than it was in the past - where all of his memories came to unite. There were a surprising amount of books spread out on the coffee table, two of which he'd given her on the way in. She'd taken them happily, stuffing them into her bag with the rest of her things. A gift from Gajeel was a rare thing, after all. And she wanted to remember this moment for as long as she lived.

She would never in her wildest dreams have imagined that she'd be standing in Gajeel's home one day, sifting through photographs and revisiting old memories. Certainly not when she'd first met him. Black Steel was starting to lose his edge. Trailing a fingertip over the frame of a nearby photograph, Levy found herself looking deep into six year old Gajeel's eyes. His smile was an unexpected but pleasant surprise.

"Would ya quit groping everything with those filthy hands of yours, Shrimp?"

Levy's cheeks warmed as her mind flickered back to their embarrassing morning. "Idiot."

Stuffing her hands into her pockets, Levy bent to get a look at the other photographs. Most of them were of Gajeel and Juvia. It looked like some of them were missing. Levy wagered that Juvia had something to do with that.

"So, do I get to see Gajeel's bedroom?" Levy asked, licking her lips in an almost suggestive manner. "Baby Gajeel's tiny bed and his tiny clothes?"

"I was never tiny," he scoffed. "Go ahead, Pervert."

Squealing her victory, if she could call it that, Levy raced up the adjacent flight of stairs and emerged in a narrow hallway. Gajeel's room stood out from a mile away. The entrance was at the very end of the hallway, a big DO NOT DISTURB sign hanging from a hook wedged in the face of the door. She laughed to herself. Some things hadn't changed much, it seemed.

Twisting the handle, Levy nudged the door open and peeked inside. It was fairly clean, though the desk under the window could use a fair bit of dusting. Sneaking inside, as though she hadn't been given prior permission, Levy came to a halt in the centre of the room. There was a bed in the far corner, pushed up beneath a partially torn poster of a band she didn't recognise. At the end of his bed was a set of drawers. The top drawer had been pulled out, evidence of his last visit.

Circling the room, Levy bent to lift objects from shelves and inspect the dust on their surfaces. When she reached the desk, curiosity turned to sadness. A photograph had been laid face-down in the dust. Levy blew the dust away, stifled a sneeze, and turned it over.

It was an elderly woman. Gajeel was sitting beside her, grinning a grin she couldn't ever imagine seeing on his face. He couldn't have been very old, seven or eight at the most. He was holding a guitar in his hand.

Levy's mind wandered back to their drunken night in his apartment, to the time she'd begged him to play the guitar for her. She'd unintentionally hurt him with her request. That guitar was a reminder of the woman he'd lost - and Levy had turned it into a bargaining chip.

She stood frozen with the photo in her hand, unable to contain the swell of anguish rising within her chest. She could feel herself beginning to tremble. The heels she wore seemed suddenly tighter. Her feet, sore with blisters, threatened to give way beneath her.

She'd pressured him into playing the guitar without even knowing the emotional value of the instrument in his hands. There were so many things she didn't know about him, so many ways she could've hurt him, so many things she could've said. Regret seeped through her.

Wiping a tear from her cheek, Levy let out a scream when a hand touched her shoulder. Gajeel snatched the photo from her hand and let out a grunt. "Damn woman sure did insist on taking a lot of photos."

"You look happy," Levy commented, catching a tear from the end of her chin. "Isn't that the woman-"

"The woman I killed? Yeah, that's-"

"No!" Levy interrupted. "No, that's not what I was going to say."

"It's true though, ain't it?"

"No." Levy shook her head. "But, that's what today is all about. You should take the photo with you, you know. She obviously meant a lot to you."

"I looked like her son," he said. "That's what she used to tell me, anyway. The last thing I said before she died was that I would never be her son. That I hated living as his replacement..." Gajeel lost himself to the past for a moment. "And that I hated her."

Levy bit her lip. "Gajeel... I'm sure she knew that you didn't..."

"Doesn't matter what she thought or what she knew," Gajeel said with a shrug.

"So, are you going to tell me the story, then?" Levy asked.

"Nah. There's somewhere I want to take you, first."

Levy offered a nod of understanding. She didn't want to test the waters just yet. They didn't need another storm. "Do you think Phantom Lord will make another appearance?"

"Not if they know what's good for them," Gajeel scoffed, setting the photo down on his desk where she'd found it.

"Are you going to tell me about that, too?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Shorty."

On her way out of his bedroom, Levy slipped the photo in her bag.

* * *

"Are we almost there yet?" she whined, struggling her way up the hill. Every step was like walking on a floor of knives. The trail was covered in dirt and rubble, making the journey even more unsteady. If she removed her heels, Levy would likely standing on something sharper.

"Quit complainin'. We're almost there."

"I have every right to complain," she panted, barely able to keep up with his long strides. "You lost the right to scold me when you threw up on my shoes."

Gajeel laughed to himself. "Just leavin' my mark, Shrimp."

Why did that thought have to make her blush? "So, where are we going, anyway?"

"Stop asking questions. You'll find out soon enough."

"It distracts me from the pain," she confessed.

They'd been walking for what felt like an eternity. She'd seen the remains of a curtain wall erected in the middle of the woods, the crumbling remains of a tower used to fend off attackers, and even an old well drained dry in the passing years. They'd left civilisation behind. Levy couldn't see anything beyond the surrounding wall of trees or the veil of leaves overhead.

Though the repetition of trees was a bore, Levy was pleased to be out in the fresh air. So much so that she occasionally stopped to memorise her surroundings. She'd need the memories when she returned to her crummy old apartment.

"Damn it," Gajeel huffed. "Get on."

Levy stopped walking to discover that Gajeel had crouched to offer his back to her. She was torn between pridefully declining and climbing on in silent amazement. She neglected to do either.

"I, um..."

"Get. On."

With a squeak of submission Levy was on his back and they were walking up the hillside once again. His hands were warm and gentle on her thighs, yet firm enough that she knew without a doubt that he wouldn't drop her. At least, she hoped he wouldn't drop her. Or would he? No, she was being silly: Gajeel definitely wouldn't do that to her.

On second thought, he'd probably drop her on purpose.

Leaning against his back, Levy watched the dusty trail turn to grass and the grass turn to pavement. And then they were leaving the woods behind to approach a vast open space settled on the hilltops. Sunlight bathed the land in an almost ethereal glow.

"We're here," he said, crouching to let her off his back.

Levy wasn't sure what to think. "Where is 'here', exactly?"

"Look at your feet," he told her.

Levy stood at the foot of gravestone buried in the grass at her feet. Flowers of all kinds grew in the nearby vicinity, giving the stone a colourful frame to contrast with its dull grey appearance. There were other stones lined up behind this one, some erected above ground, others buried like this one.

"Go ahead," he said. "Read it."

"Belno," she read aloud.

"I've no doubt she'd want to meet you. The old witch never could stay out of my business."

Levy was starting to realise that Gajeel talked poorly about the people he cared about most. It was a defence mechanism of sorts, a means of shielding himself from his true feelings. He didn't have a malicious bone in his body. Not really.

"It's an honour to meet you," she said. "I'm Gajeel's neigh-friend, Levy McGarden."

"My old man wanted cremating so you'll have to make do with a visit to Belno for today." Gajeel paused to shrug. "I gave my old man's urn to Juvia."

"You don't know what to do with it, huh?"

"I don't want him sittin' there glaring at me," Gajeel confessed. "The thought gives me chills."

"Gajeel Redfox is afraid of something after all," Levy teased.

"We all have fears. Even me."

Levy smiled at that. "That's true. So, about Belno..."

"She died of a heart attack," Gajeel explained. "Two years ago, before I moved to Magnolia. Phantom Lord was starting to take a turn for the worst and she was determined to 'save my soul', as she put it. The stress of waiting up for me every night, wondering where I was, who I might hurt next, eventually killed her. It was my fault. She loved me and I drove her to an early grave."

Levy placed a comforting hand on his arm. "I don't think she'd see it that way. What she did for you had an obvious effect, Gajeel. Because of Belno, because of her love, you moved to Magnolia Town and tried to make things right."

"She didn't have to die for that to happen," Gajeel whispered. She could hear the pain in his voice. It slithered out like poison dripping off the end of his tongue. "No one should have to die for my sake."

"Phantom Lord was a mistake, Gajeel. We all make mistakes. You're _allowed_ to make mistakes."

She couldn't explain the warm feeling swelling up inside her. All at once she felt alive and at home. She wanted to protect him, to care for him and to be beside him. The desire to make him smile was as prominent as her need to breathe.

Glancing up at the side of his face, Levy traced the assortment of piercings on his brows and nose with her gaze, allowing herself time to count the glints of sunlight reflected in the silver studs.

They were fire and rain. Skin and steel. They were polar opposites and yet, somewhere in the middle of all that, they were the same. Two entities driven by a need to change. Two people who'd lost something precious.

"Sorry I never visit," Gajeel laughed, wiping a tear from his cheek as he bent to inspect Belno's grave. "I guess I'll have to change that now, huh? Don't want you risin' from the dead to kick my ass."

Levy surprised herself with a bubbling laugh.

"I don't know if you get the news up there, Granny, but things are gettin' better for me. There's this annoying neighbour of mine who keeps forcing me to do things I don't like, but it makes for an interesting time."

Levy's heart fluttered in her chest. "Gajeel..."

She knew then what that feeling was. Powerful and mystical, like a touch of magic coursing through her veins. Her body tingled with the need to expose those feelings, to scream them from the hilltop and let them echo across Gajeel's home town.

Folding her arms across her chest, Levy watched him brush dirt from the face of the gravestone. It was a small but quaint stone; it was easy to tell that it contained all of his feelings. He'd probably bought it himself, she realised. An apology for what he'd done.

An apology for running away.

"Look after my old man up there, ya hear? I don't want him coming back to complain, either," Gajeel went on.

Levy felt honoured and privileged to be witnessing Gajeel's attempt at closure. Her heart was frantic with the amalgam of sorrow and joy she felt in that one single moment.

"Anyway, I brought Levy here to meet you, so I should let her do the rest of the talkin', right?"

Levy studied the curve of his back and the way his hair shimmered in the sunlight. How could someone so cold make her feel so warm?

"Anything to add, Shrimp?"

No, she was wrong. He'd always been warm. " _I love you_."


	10. Closer

**A/N: This chapter started out one way and finished up another omg. Oh boy, oh boy. I need a minute. xD**

* * *

 **Chapter Ten: Closer**

* * *

 _My words roll off my tongue right onto your lips, oh.  
I'm keeping cool while you keep smiling, saying all the things I'm thinking.  
Oh man, oh man, I am like you so I want proof I'm what you're feeling.  
'Cause if I want you, and I want you, babe. Ain't going backwards, won't ask for space.  
_ _'Cause space is just a word made up by someone who's afraid to get too close._

* * *

 _I love you._

The words reverberated through her mind like double-edged knives, leaving no inch of flesh, no inch of thought, untouched by their blades. The words themselves left her immobilised, tingling in a delightful twist of realisation and anguish. She stood on the precipice of wanting to turn and run but, when the thought finally reached her legs, Levy had all but forgotten how to use them. It didn't matter how badly she wanted to escape, Levy was glued to the spot either way.

She couldn't bring herself to look at him again, not with such powerful words hanging in the air between them. The cemetery had fallen quiet all around them, save the distant rustling of leaves and the dull, steady throb of her own heartbeat. Even the headstones seemed to mock her with their silent reminder that all things must come to an end.

"I mean... That's what you should..." No, she couldn't lie her way out of this one. Levy wasn't sure she even wanted to. "Gajeel, I-"

"Let's go," he interrupted, deflecting the topic with a steady flick of his wrist. "You have work tomorrow, right?"

"What? No, I took a few days off to-"

"Well, change of plan."

"But-"

"Let's just go already."

Levy couldn't pursue him even after he'd turned and set off in a brisk pace through the cemetery. No matter how much she wanted to chase his back, there was no ignoring the aches and pains in her feet. She was sure at this point that even her blisters were starting to form blisters.

Gritting her teeth, Levy took a bold step forward. It was no use. She fell to her knees and stifled a whimper. She couldn't cry here like this; what did she have to cry about? She's the one who packed heels hoping to stand a little taller at his side. She's the one who thought, maybe, she could get closer to his heart during this trip. In the end, Levy had been the only one getting excited by their intimate conversations.

She felt so stupid.

"What a pain." She glanced up to find Gajeel crouched on the balls of his feet before her. His shadow seemed somehow heavy as it fell over her trembling form.

"I'm sorry..."

His lopsided smile temporarily disarmed the heartache as it made its final course through her aching body. Gajeel hoisted her up into his arms with ease, holding her like a groom would surely his new bride. The way he cradled her was so gentle, not at all like the way he'd carried her on his back. She could hear his heart pounding in his chest.

"When we get back," he sighed, "I'm introducin' you to a pair of runnin' shoes."

* * *

The walk to the station had been long and tiresome; for Gajeel, at least. He carried her bag on one arm, his on the other, and a full sized Levy on his back. She grabbed the front of his jacket as they stood waiting for the train, the bite of the evening wind more than enough to make her shiver. Why did the breeze in Spring time always seem so especially hostile?

The looks they got while boarding the train seemed less daunting than they would have if bigger problems weren't currently weighing on her mind. Being rejected was far more humiliating and stung worse than any passing remark. At least, she assumed she'd been rejected. Levy didn't have the heart to ask at this point. They'd revisited his house to pick up a few items and then they'd returned to the hotel and packed in silent admission of their crumbling relationship. Bringing it up now would surely only make things worse.

Gajeel carried her through the train until they happened upon an empty carriage situated towards the rear. Rows of seats were empty on either side of them, offering him plenty of choice. Gajeel stopped at a section of group seats towards the back of the carriage. Two pairs of seats faced each other across a fairly large space that looked to have once accommodated a table of some sort between them.

Throwing their bags onto the seats facing backwards, Gajeel bent to give Levy a safe enough distance to climb off his back to sit in the seats opposite them.

"Are you going to be okay?" she asked him when he sat beside her. "With travelling, I mean."

"Wendy gave me some medication for travelling," he said. "I didn't think they'd kick in this damn fast, though. I'm feelin' a little tired."

Levy frowned. "You didn't have to carry me all the way here, I can..."

Tired was an understatement. She hadn't even finished her sentence when Gajeel fell onto her shoulder and proceeded to snore into the empty carriage. Well, at least he wouldn't be vomiting on her shoes any time soon.

 _I love you._

What the hell was she even thinking? What was he going to say to that, exactly? _Thank you_? They didn't even know each other that well. At least, not in an intimate sense. Of course he didn't know what to say. Who would? If it had been the other way around she'd probably... No, Levy couldn't deny her feelings.

She would've been happy.

Levy jumped in her seat when Gajeel's weight pulled him down onto her lap. Just the sight of him sleeping was enough to distract her from the blur of landscape rushing by. Not even the stars offered her a reason to look away from such a peaceful face.

Combing her fingers through his hair, Levy caressed the side of his face with her knuckles. She wondered if there was some way, some miracle, that he hadn't heard what she'd said. She wished she could go backwards like the seats across from her. Maybe, just maybe, if she sat in one, then the two of them would be rushed back to the morning.

In the end, she had to face the music. But, then, what was she supposed to do about it now? Could she just ignore it? Would it go away? No, this would never go away.

She didn't want it to go away.

Retrieving her phone from her left pocket, Levy leaned back in her seat, free hand still roaming through Gajeel's dark tresses. Why did his hair have to be so damn soft? Why did he have to be the one?

With a sigh, Levy opened a blank message to Lucy.

 _Change of plans.  
Be home tonight._

 _I have something to tell you._

 _Levy xx_

A response came almost instantly, nearly startling the phone out of Levy's hand. She caught it above Gajeel's face and allowed herself a quick moment to catch her breath.

 _I'll bring Lily this weekend.  
Is everything okay?_

 _Lu x_

Levy sighed. She couldn't say it like this. Not through a wall of text. What she had to say, what she had to confide in Lucy, could only be done in person.

 _I'll tell you on the weekend._

She had originally planned to leave Lily with Mira, whose sister was, to put it mildly, obsessed with animals. From what she'd heard, Lisanna wanted to pursue veterinary work in the future.

In the end, though, Lucy had offered to take him. Something about their cat, Happy, wanting a playmate. Levy couldn't help but be a little envious that the two of them were so close. Raising a kitten together. Living in the same house. Pursuing dreams together. Laughing together.

Levy wanted that too.

She'd had some of those things with Lucy; sharing responsibilities, rooms, dreams - but, this time, Levy wanted more than that. Being with Gajeel set her blood on fire. She didn't quite understand it, but the more she thought about him, the more she wanted to touch him. The space between them was suffocating.

She just wanted to be closer to him.

* * *

The next day was no different to the last, leaving Levy oppressed by invasive thoughts and stings of occasional doubt.

Closing the door behind herself, Levy looked out into the poorly lit lobby. Two residents walked by without so much as a greeting, their eyes focused on the stairs at the end of the hall. She waited until they disappeared to set off in the same direction, not entirely trusting of her other neighbours. If Gajeel was anything to go by, well, she had her reasons to be suspicious.

Stuffing her hands into her pockets, Levy shuffled on ahead without much conscious thought, numb and exhausted with the ghost of her unanswered confession following her wherever she turned. It was one thing to be rejected - at least then she could try to move on. Instead, everything had been left in the air like an invisible, tasteless smog released to poison her from the inside.

She stopped at the entrance to the stairwell, stepping aside when a figure emerged on her floor. To Levy's surprise, an exhausted Gajeel stepped into the lobby, his eyes swollen with lack of sleep. She hadn't even heard him leave his apartment. After returning home, both had said their goodbyes and retired for the night. She'd just assumed that Gajeel had gone straight to bed.

"Gajeel? Are you-"

"Oh, hey, Shrimp," he grumbled, barely able to look her in the eye as he walked by her.

"Were you out all night?" she asked.

"Was I?"

He hadn't even noticed. "What were you doing?"

"I was drinking, _Mother_ ," he snapped.

"All night?" Levy clenched a fist at her side. "Gajeel, that's..."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm going to bed. Take care, Levy."

"Gajeel, wait!" Snatching the back of his shirt, Levy forced Gajeel to a halt. He didn't bother to look back at her. She stole a breath and suppressed all of her doubts, if only temporarily.

"What is it?" he asked. "I'm tired, Levy."

She wished he'd stop using her name in such an irritable tone.

Levy hung her head. "Gajeel... I..."

Gajeel turned to pry her fingers from his shirt. "I've gotta go, Shrimp. Lily will be waitin' for me, ya know?"

Levy stared at his back until he vanished behind his apartment door. Her eyes stung with the threat of impending tears. "Nice try, Stupid Gajeel."

Lucy hadn't brought Lily back yet.

"What kind of plan is this, Lucy?"

"You'll see," Lucy grinned, waving their bag of alcoholic goodies through the air.

Levy's confession hadn't been brought up again. Or, rather, the opportunity itself had never come up again. Gajeel made himself busy for the rest of the week, returning home late in the night as to avoid running into her. Levy had heard him fumbling with the faulty handle of his door during the early hours of the morning, leaving her with thoughts of where he'd been and what he'd been doing. All she knew, right now, was that being ignored felt a thousand times worse than being rejected.

She owed him time to grieve over his father and over the past. She owed him space. But, even so, Levy thought she deserved to be acknowledged, even just a little bit.

* * *

"Seriously, Lucy, what's going on?" Levy asked, fighting to keep up with Lucy's pace. Even now, in flat shoes, Levy's remaining blisters were sore. "And where is Lily?"

"Shhhhhhh." Lucy turned to press a fingertip against Levy's lips. "I said you'll see!"

Dragging herself up the stairs, Levy found herself questioning Lucy's sanity as she swung the heavy bag back and forth, humming to herself like Cana the night of graduation. Everyone had been so drunk then. Levy smiled at the memory.

The door to Levy's apartment had been propped open by one of her empty moving boxes. Inside, Gajeel and Natsu were falling all over each other, throwing punches and yelling out when the occasional fist landed.

"I told you two not to fight!" Lucy scolded. "Natsu!"

Beyond the two squabbling men were two small cats huddled up on Levy's beanbag chair. Happy and Lily, she later realised.

"Gajeel," Levy groaned, "you're going to make a mess."

"Don't worry," he chortled, "I won't draw any blood. I just wanna give this moron a taste of his own stupidity."

"Who're you callin' stupid?!" Natsu didn't get a chance to retaliate. Lucy was dragging him off Gajeel like a blur of wind wafting through falling leaves, scattering them before they could even touch the ground.

"We're getting drunk tonight!" Lucy insisted. "So both of you have to behave. We need you fit and healthy if we're going to play a game."

"A game?" Levy asked, slipping out of her cardigan to throw it on the end of her bed. "What are you up to, Lucy?"

"Does she always ask this many questions?" Lucy asked, direction her question at no one in particular, but fixing her gaze on Gajeel all the same.

"Always," he affirmed. "You should know that, bein' you lived with her an' all."

"I was just validating that some things haven't changed," Lucy teased, opening a bottle and passing it to Levy. "Okay, everybody sit in a circle."

Levy didn't have the patience or the energy to argue. She sat cross-legged between Lucy and Gajeel, staring at Natsu with the hopes of deducing Lucy's plan. As it turned out, Natsu didn't seem to know anything, either, given the blank look he gave her when they exchanged their silent questions.

"We're going to play a game of Kings, or, Queens, depending how you look at it," Lucy explained, drawing four lollipop sticks from the pocket of her shorts. "Whoever pulls King or, you know, Queen, gets to order two of their loyal subjects around. The other three sticks are numbered one to three, meaning, if our King - or Queen - tells, say, number three to do something to number two, they _have_ to do it. Or else."

"Or else what?" Levy asked.

"Or else..." Lucy considered the answer for a moment. "Whoever forfeits the ruling has to give up an item of clothing!"

"W-what?" Levy squeaked, casting a longing glance across the room to where she'd left her cardigan.

"You're on, Blondie," Gajeel snickered, rising to the challenge like a bull seeing red. "Bring it on."

"Where did you come up with this game?!" Levy gasped. It seemed eerily familiar, but not enough for Levy to place its origin.

"Erza, of course~" Lucy confessed.

Levy's heart was suddenly in her throat.

"No way am I gonna lose to this idiot!" Natsu chimed in.

"I'm game if you are, Levy?" Lucy agreed.

Levy hung her head. "Do I even have a choice?"

Lucy smiled the answer.

* * *

One drink after another led the group through a number of embarrassing predicaments. When Natsu wasn't forcing Lucy to demonstrate ridiculous fighting moves on an unsuspecting victim, he was provoking Gajeel into trashing Levy's poor apartment. To make matters worse, when Gajeel was chosen as King, no one dared to agree to his orders, leaving Lucy and Levy in little more than their underwear and socks.

"I should've taken my socks off first," Levy realised, only now aware of how quick the alcohol had affected her judgement.

"Natsu," Lucy purred. "Stroke my hair."

"Hey, it's my turn to be King," he reminded her, waving the winning stick through the air.

"Come on~" Lucy insisted, rubbing the side of her face against his shoulder.

Levy glanced back at the cardigan spread out on her bed, longing in silence to cover her exposed skin. She felt lucky, in some ways, that Gajeel didn't see her as a woman - though he'd done a pretty good job of avoiding looking at her all the same. Maybe he did have a little decency in him after all.

Snatching the stick from Natsu's hand, Lucy pressed the tip with the poorly drawn crown against her lips. "I want to be Queen for a change!"

Natsu crossed his arms over his chest. "How come you get to cheat but when I tried to-"

"Because it's _my_ game," Lucy reminded him with a friendly wiggle of her fingertips. "Now be quiet, it's my turn to dish out the orders!"

"I thought it was Erza's game," Levy quipped.

"Shhhhhhh," Lucy giggled.

Levy rolled her chosen stick over the length of her palm. It didn't seem to matter how drunk she got, Levy couldn't shake the lingering sensation that something was about to go wrong.

"Number one and number two have to..." Lucy paused to consider her options. Her eyes settled on Gajeel's face, who in turn looked away from her. "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!"

Levy's stick fell out her hands with a gasp. A bold _two_ glared up at her from the carpet.

Gajeel tossed his stick into the middle of their circle. "I'm tired of this game. It's boring."

Levy's heart was pounding. She reached down to start removing a sock, knowing full well that Gajeel wasn't going to kiss her. Lucy's hand reached out to stop her. Levy fell into the chasm of her dark eyes, allowing herself a moment to suffocate in their depths as she tumbled on down.

And then she hit the bottom. "Lucy?"

"The penalty system has been changed," Lucy said, turning a suspicious glare on Gajeel. "Failure to perform this task requires all clothes being removed by _both_ parties."

Levy's eyes widened. "I don't want to take my clothes off, Lu! I've never even had a date before. This is too much."

"Then you'll just have to kiss him, isn't that right?"

"Drunk Lucy is so mean!" Levy gasped.

"Isn't she, though?" Natsu said with a smile that betrayed his true feelings. Levy didn't even want to know what he and _Drunk Lucy_ got up to in private.

"Fine, damn it," Gajeel acquiesced. "Come over here, Shrimp. Let's get this over with."

 _Let's get this over with_? Levy scowled. "No. I'd rather take my clothes off."

"Quit yer complaining and get over here already."

"Or, you know, you can start taking your clothes off," Lucy reminded her.

"Okay, okay," she said, shuffling across the floor in a panic. "Jeez, I'm going to remember this when your birthday rolls around, Lu."

Sitting up on her knees, Levy tried to ignore the observing eyes on her back. She turned her gaze on Gajeel's, memorising the swirl of emotion in his eyes. She wasn't even sure where to start. How did these things usually go? With both fists clenched on her thighs, Levy squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the inevitable. She felt the weight of his right hand grasping her shoulder and the gentle sweep of his left caressing her cheek. His warm breath fanned her face as he leaned in, reminding her that she, too, needed to take a breath. Her body ached with the growing need to relax, her legs throbbing and her knuckles surely turning white.

Levy's eyes snapped open when his lips touched her forehead. "Gajeel?"

"She didn't say where I had to kiss you," Gajeel explained. "An' here I thought you were the smartest one sitting in this circle."

A few sly kisses later - most of which had been exchanged by Natsu and Gajeel in a few moments of hilarity - and their game finally came to an end. Lucy was stuffing things back into her bag, preparing to leave for the night. Gajeel had taken Lily back to his apartment after exchanging a few quiet words with Lucy. Neither of them cared to share their conversation, but Lucy had come back looking a little too angry for Levy's liking.

"What did you guys talk about?" Levy asked, slipping her arms into her cardigan. She was relieved to be fully dressed again. "You don't look so good, Lucy."

"Oh, nothing much," Lucy said, twirling her phone in one hand before jamming it deep into the side pocket of her bag. "I gave him a little advice, that's all."

Levy shivered. "A little advice?"

Lucy smiled. "Don't worry about it, okay? I'm sorry for barging in on your apartment like this, Levy."

"What? You're welcome here any time, you know that. I've been pretty lonely, I guess. It was nice to see both of you."

"Don't be a stranger," Natsu said from where he leaned against a kitchen counter. "Lucy gets antsy when you don't call her."

"I do not," Lucy deflected. "I just worry a little bit."

"Hey, Luce, I'm going to head down and see if our ride is here." The two girls watched Natsu leave, each taking a moment to let out an exasperated breath. He often left them to their girl talk during the end of their playful nights.

"I'm sorry about those two," Lucy said. "Natsu has been itching for a fight ever since Gray stopped hanging out with us as much. Did you know he's officially announced that he's dating now?"

Levy grinned at that. "Yeah, kinda. Juvia's a good girl, I think she'll do him a lot of good."

"I know how tempting it is to think you can change someone, Levy. That they'll change only for you."

Levy stared at her friend in silence.

"Be careful, Levy. Some people just aren't meant to change. And some people will unintentionally hurt those who try to help them. I don't want to see you get hurt."

Levy knew without asking that Lucy was referring to her relationship with Gajeel. "I told you not to worry about me, didn't I?"

"Don't wait too long for an answer, okay?"

Levy couldn't swallow the fist-sized lump in her throat. If anything, it seemed to be growing faster and larger in the time it took her to take one breath.

A sudden bang on the wall startled the two girls, leaving them in a fit of quiet laughter that faded as quickly as it came. It was a nice distraction if nothing else.

"I'll be right back," Levy said, heading for the door before Lucy could think to stop her. "He probably has some insults left in him that he wants to get out."

Had she been alone, Gajeel would have simply yelled through the hole.

Levy hadn't finished knocking when the door to Gajeel's apartment swung open and a single arm sprang out to drag her into the room. He threw her against the door, forcing it to a close with the weight of their bodies crashing against it. She could taste the alcohol laced in his breath as it fanned her face, the mere warmth of it was intoxicating.

"Gajeel?" she breathed, her chest heaving with the shock of force he'd used. "What's going on?"

He withdrew a lollipop stick from his pocket and waved the symbol of the crown across her line of sight. "I'm King. You have to do what I say, ain't that right?"

Levy shook her head. "N-no. I mean, I didn't draw a number."

"You don't have to. In this game, the King has absolute control."

Levy's body felt weak as he pressed himself against her, one hand resting beside her head. His eyes burned bright like two flames waiting to devour her in their heat. She could already feel herself beginning to melt in their embrace.

"Y-you've been avoiding me," she scolded. "You have no right to be so arrogant."

Gajeel's smile twisted into one of amusement. "I've been busy."

"Busy doing what?" she asked.

"Working," he said, scowling his distaste at her barrage of questions. "I have something I want."

Levy raised a brow. "Finally saving up to fix that hole, huh?"

Gajeel snorted. "Not this time."

"Look, Gajeel, I have to get back. Lucy is waiting to-"

"Not yet," he interrupted. "I play to win, Levy McGarden."

He tossed the stick over his shoulder and placed his free hand against her hip. Hot sparks danced up her skin. No amount of alcohol could have prepared her for something like this. She felt disorientated by the closeness of his face alone.

"You're drunk," she whispered.

"Were you disappointed?" he asked, flicking his gaze to her forehead.

Levy's arms fell limp at her sides. "What kind of question is that? Stupid Gajeel."

"You have to answer," he reminded her. "I'm King."

"What happens if I don't answer?"

"I open the door and you go home disappointed," he snickered.

The threat of his words made Levy's skin tingle with the kindling realisation that she didn't want to leave just yet. "Why are you doing this? You know how I feel, don't you?"

Leaning in closer, Gajeel studied the weight of emotion in her eyes. "I do."

"Then, you already know the answer, don't you?" Levy didn't know if the alcohol had made her bolder or if she'd simply gotten used to dealing with his brash, unusual temperament. All she knew was that she'd had enough of being bullied by him.

" _I do_."

And just like that the fuse between them was lit. Levy threw her legs around Gajeel's waist as he hoisted her up against the door, their lips coming together like two magnets driven by a powerful force of attraction. The kiss was clumsy and passionate, their lips melting against one and other in the throbbing heat and broiling tension.

Gajeel's hands were firm against her thighs as he carried her across the room towards the couch. His lips refused to leave hers and Levy basked in the suffocating heat of it all.

Like surfacing for air moments before drowning, Levy gasped for breath when he fell back onto the couch. She found herself panting for breath on his lap, both legs spread on either side of him. Neither of them seemed to know what to say as he stared up at her.

"Listen, Shrimp. Actually, there's something I-"

"Oh my gosh!" Lucy's voice pulled their attention to the wall opposite them - and to the blonde woman waiting beyond it. Levy could physically hear the sound of Lucy clapping her hands over her mouth. " _Crap._ "

Dread shimmered through Levy's veins in a rush of cold realisation. Holding Gajeel's shoulders, Levy leaned back to gape over her shoulder at the hole in his wall, and at the face of her companion looking through it. "L-Lucy?!"

Lucy stared at them through the fist-sized hole. "M-my ride is here."

* * *

 _I'm sorry about all these cliffhangers omg. The next chapter is in Gajeel's POV!_ _I'm planning to add to the side stories in Anamnesis soon, too, detailing Lucy's implied conversation with Gajeel this chapter! So look out for that. 3_

 _Don't forget that you can request side stories for the collection, too. :)_


	11. This Is Goodbye

**A/N: There will be flashbacks to Gajeel's conversation with Lucy in this chapter, which, for reference, you can find in No Peeking! Anamnesis chapter three. I apologise for any sudden skips in the story. Line breaks are, once again, failing on me. And we slide right into Gajeel's POV in three... two... one...**

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven: This Is Goodbye**

* * *

 _The truth is I'm fallin' to pieces any time you're around.  
The trouble is the truth keeps slipping out.  
Can't seem to hide what I'm feeling, can't believe what I'm saying out loud.  
The truth is there's no turning back now.  
Well I guess I should've learned how to lie a little better._

* * *

Gajeel slammed the door closed with a heavy sigh. He was glad to see the back of Lucy's head, even if that head belonged to a woman who'd scored him quite the interesting night. He could hear Levy pacing back and forth behind him, muttering to herself and apologising as though she, alone, had tempted Lucy into looking at their graduation photo and, in turn, finding the hole behind it.

"She thinks I'm a pervert," Levy rambled on, stopping to pinch at her arm every now and then. "She thinks we peep at each other and, and, and, and I don't even know what else! I bet she thinks we meet up to do sordid things like that all the time!"

"Well, she's not completely wrong," he said, clearing his throat. "Tonight, anyway."

Levy shot a baleful glance in his direction. "Stupid Gajeel!"

"I didn't hear you complaining ten minutes ago." Why the hell did he say that?

Her lips quivered as the colour returned to her face. "You're a jerk. I hate you the most."

Gajeel stifled a laugh. He didn't dare make a remark on that front. Truth be told, he wasn't ready to open Pandora's box just yet. She was an equation without a formula and he'd be damned if he offered a solution without knowing the reason for his answer. Levy's feelings back then had rendered him speechless. His entire world, for a time, had been thrust into chaos - more so than usual at least. Her words dredged forth every bad thing he'd ever done; every fight, every theft, every insult.

Levy deserved better.

 _You don't get to decide what's best for Levy._

Gajeel swallowed the lump in his throat. Lucy had been right. In the end, the only person who suffered from all this indecisiveness was Levy. He brandished sorrow well, knew how to bear the weight of it in battle. But Levy, Levy was delicate - though she'd never admit it aloud. She wore ideals and fantasies on her sleeve and let them guide her forward. She had her head in the clouds, or, more accurately, in the books she liked to read. Reality was skewed for her.

"Well, at least she won't say anything about it," Levy sighed. "Lucy would never do that to me. Thank you for talking to her, anyway."

"Maybe we should fix the hole after all," Gajeel wondered, staring at it now as though it could hear everything they were saying. "It might be for the best."

"Can I ask you something?"

Gajeel stepped away from the door and strode into the room, arms folded across his chest. The way she watched him reminded him of the time they'd first met, the way she'd stared at him and passed judgements that were half-truths deflected with ill humour and passive remarks. "Ask away."

"It's just, well, if Lucy hadn't interrupted..."

Truth be told, Gajeel couldn't remember the exact words he'd wanted to say. He'd been intoxicated and driven by the sudden invasion of heat. In that moment, he'd wanted her and nothing else. Maybe that's what he wanted to tell her. Now, sober and exhausted, Gajeel didn't have the strength needed to tell her how he felt.

 _Reject her now and get it over with_.

Rejecting Levy had been his first intention when he'd opened the door to his apartment. But there she'd stood in all her drunken glory, full lips and flushed skin practically beckoning for a kiss. He'd never felt that way about anyone before. He'd certainly never wanted someone the way he'd wanted her prior to Lucy's interruption. The sensation was almost violent - a burning need that could very well drive him mad. What was he even trying to do? Levy would no doubt be confused and need an explanation. Gajeel didn't have one.

Sorrow he wore well, guilt not so much.

"We should really get some sleep," he said. "It's my turn to cook tomorrow."

Pain flickered and faded in her eyes like stars burning out to leave only darkness behind. "Tomorrow, then."

He watched her leave, head down, arms limp at her sides. He hadn't noticed until now that her cardigan was inside out, the tag poking out at the back of her neck. She'd been so desperate to cover herself up that she hadn't paid attention to detail. How unlike her.

His mind flickered back to their game, to Levy sitting in her unexpectedly cute underwear with its pink frills and stupid pink bows. Gritting his teeth, Gajeel locked the door behind her and shuffled back into the room. Collapsing on the couch, he let Lily scamper up onto his lap, where he proceeded to stroke his long black fur. "You're gettin' heavy, Cat. What did Blondie feed you while we were gone?"

Lily mewled an almost needy response before leaping to the ground and clawing at the opposing wall. He saw Levy wander by the gap and listened for the inevitable sound of her sitting beside it. He could hear the faint rustle of her fingertips leafing through the pages of a book.

"You're not going to bed?" he asked.

He heard her laugh. "After that wake up call? No. I still have to read Lucy's novel, so, I thought I'd make a head-start. I have nothing planned tomorrow, after all."

"Don't forget about dinner. If you're late... I'll leave your food to burn."

"Do you regret it?" she asked, deflecting the topic of food and winding him in the process.

"No. I don't." He was met with silence. "You fall asleep, Shrimp?"

"Sorry... I wasn't expecting such an honest answer."

"Maybe I'm still drunk," he mused.

"Yeah, maybe. Is that why you kissed me?"

"I don't know."

She waved a hand across the hole. "Did you ever make up a future in your head? Like, you're married with kids and you work a great job and your house is spotless and everything just seems so perfect?"

"I could never imagine a happy ending," Gajeel said, "let alone a perfect one."

"So you never imagined it, then?"

"I never used to," he confessed.

Though the spark of hope was small for Gajeel, it existed all the same. A rekindling of dreams wrest from a pit of shame somewhere in the darkest crevices of his mind. It was thanks to her that he could think about the future at all. About what he wanted to do and how he wanted to make up for lost time.

"Lucy means well, you know. I don't know what the two of you talked about, but, I just wanted you to know that."

"I know. Blondie's got her heart in the right place. You just can't see it under those two floatation devices on her ch-"

"Gajeel" Levy snapped. "Honestly, what's wrong with you?"

Gajeel snorted a laugh. "I am a man, you know."

He could practically hear the sound of her lips turning down into a frown. "Right. Of course you are."

"I think I like small better," he mumbled, welcoming Lily back onto his lap with a gentle pat on the head.

"What did you say?" she asked, flipping the page of her book. "I couldn't hear you."

Gajeel smiled to himself. "Just thinking about how damn small you are."

Levy huffed. "Stupid."

So beautifully, adorably, perfectly small.

* * *

"Oi, put the pen down. We have to enjoy the sun while it's out you know," Gajeel scolded, stealing her pen and slapping her hand away from the growing pile of paperwork on the counter. "Your shift ended over an hour ago."

Levy stared up at him in apparent shock, her hand still poised as though she held a pen between her fingertips. "It's my turn to cook, isn't it? I can't believe I forgot. I'm sorry."

While it _was_ her turn to cook, Gajeel having fulfilled his duties as chef the day before, that _wasn't_ his motive for walking out to meet her. "What're you even doing, anyway?"

"Oh, I was tweaking my resumé," she explained, stuffing the papers into a folder which she later forced into her bag. "I'm applying to some more publishing agencies. I can't give up, right?"

He remembered seeing her cry that day - the day she'd been passed over for the job of her dreams. He was starting to realise that Levy McGarden, strong as she claimed to be, had a difficult time handling rejection. That thought made his stomach twist.

Fingering the paper sticking out of his back pocket, Gajeel hesitated before stuffing it deeper into his jeans. "I thought we could eat out today."

"Eat out?"

"I came into some money," he said. "My old man's money, actually."

And he'd finally been paid for the odd jobs he'd been doing for old man Makarov. Not that she needed to know that.

"Okay," she agreed, fastening the clasp of her bag with an audible click. "But only if you let me pay for the meal. It's still my turn to cook."

"What kind of man would I be if I let my date pay for her meal?"

"A man who's up to date with modern-day equality," she quipped, only to pale when she realised what he'd said. "Wait, what date?"

"You said you'd never been on a date before. Isn't this basically the same thing?"

"No, no it's not! Dates are supposed to be between two people who-"

"Quit complaining. Let's go already; I'm starving."

With a quick goodbye to Mirajane, he and Levy were soon making their way to the chain of stores across town. He'd never actually taken the time to sample any of the menus in Magnolia, so he'd leave the decision on food up to her. Food was food after all.

"This weather is gorgeous," she sighed blissfully, tilting her head back to let more of the sunlight caress her skin. A sheen of gloss sparkled on her red lips.

Gajeel swallowed the lump in his throat. "Actually, there's somewhere I wanna go before we eat."

"Oh?" Levy asked, glancing around the quiet streets. "Is it close by?"

"Not far," he told her, fixing his gaze on the jagged line of buildings in the distance. They wandered past an assortment of different stores, ranging from tourist destinations to humble little clothing boutiques and even the occasional hardware store. Gajeel slowed Levy to a stop when they arrived at a small building wedged between a salon and what looked like an old antique shop. Rows of shoes stared up at him from the window.

"What are you looking at, Gajeel? Oh, a shoe shop?" she asked, leaning down to look at a pair of heels in the window. "Wow, those are expensive."

"Come on," he said.

"Wait, we're going in? This is where you wanted to go?"

Welcomed by the jingle of a tiny bell hanging from the door frame, Gajeel took Levy's hand and helped her up the few narrow steps leading into the store. He pulled her towards a particular shelf in the back with multiple pairs of flat shoes. One pair in particular had pink bows laced through them, reminding him, despite his will to suppress the memory, of the sight of Levy in her cute, pink underwear.

"These are so pretty," she said, pulling a pair of black ballerina-flats from the end of the shelf. She played with the white spotted bows as she not-so-discreetly flipped them over to check the size (and the price).

"Those're your size," he commented, recalling the number in the soles of her ruined shoes. "Though, I never expected you to go for black."

"They reminded me of your..."

Taking the shoes from her hands, Gajeel waved them at the attendant behind the counter. "Can she try these on?"

A simple nod later and Gajeel was forcing Levy into a seat in the middle of the room. Try as she might, Levy couldn't seem to suppress the smile on her face as she slipped her feet into her chosen shoes. It was a perfect fit.

"Can she wear them out?" he asked, gesturing to the shoes on her feet.

"Of course," the young woman agreed.

"Then I'll take them," he said, digging through a side pocket for his wallet.

"Wait, what?" Levy asked, jumping out of her seat in an attempt at stopping him. "Gajeel, you don't have to..."

"They match your belt," he said, letting his eyes take in the shape of her figure in the blue halter-neck dress she wore. The black belt she wore around her waist defined her hips in such a way it made him dizzy.

Levy frowned. "But, I mean, you shouldn't spend-"

"There are a lot of things in my life that I can't make up for," he said. "Don't let ruinin' your damn shoes be one of them."

Levy gave a reluctant nod. "Okay. Thank you."

* * *

The entire time they were walking, Levy never once took her eyes off her feet - or her new shoes. Gajeel had had to steady her once or twice when they crossed streets, even guiding her away from street lamps as they neared the restaurant.

Sitting in Levy's chosen destination now was a relief, though it didn't stop her from staring at her new shoes all the same. They sat in the back of a small café with fictional quotes scrawled across walls and piles of decorative books stacked in the corners. It even smelled like an old book store, except the occasional scent of hot food that wafted in and out of the kitchen. He thought the choice suited her well, though he'd never admit it, instead occupying his mind with the choice of food on the menu.

Matters of her confession had been held in abeyance since their kiss. He wondered if the topic would evaporate like boiling water should they let it, or if, instead, it would continue to fester and thrash in her mind until it burst free of its container.

"Did you ever sit like this with your father? Or with Belno?" she asked suddenly, focusing her gaze on his instead of her brand new shoes.

"I used to eat burgers with Belno on Saturdays," he mumbled. "She hated the grease and would complain non-stop but said it was nice to see me smiling. Weird lady. Real weird."

Levy laughed at that. "That's so sweet."

"I guess," he said with a shrug. "I mean, if that's how you wanna see it. For me it was a nuisance. There were times when I'd be out causing trouble and still, every Saturday, she'd pester me to meet her. Whether my clothes were bloodied or my bag was filled with stolen goods, Belno would always buy me a burger."

"Then, that's what we'll eat today. It isn't Saturday, but I think the moment still counts for something, right?"

Gajeel's cheeks warmed. "Sure. Whatever."

He thought the way she smiled at him with a strand of hair wrapped around her finger had an almost coquettish charm to it. He'd become more aware of Levy as a woman lately and this awareness was starting to get the better of him. What she lacked in one area she more than made up for in another. And now, to top it off, he was discovering a subtle attraction to her intelligence. Or, rather, whenever she corrected him he had the nail-biting urge to silence her.

With his lips.

He let Levy take care of their orders as he slipped out of any reasonable coherency, unable to take his eyes off her lips as they moved to form words. What was it about her that captivated him so damn much? He hated these urges the most. Hated himself in such a way he wanted to melt right into his chair.

"I ordered you a milkshake," she said, her voice cutting through his thoughts. "I hope you don't mind."

"No, it's fine," he mumbled.

"You were really zoning out there. Did I make you uncomfortable with my question?"

"No, it's fine," he said again.

"Listen, Gajeel, I'm really sorry about..."

"Don't apologise," he said. "There's no need, you got that?"

She had no need to speak to him with such a contrite tone of voice. He should've been the one apologising. He should've been the one expressing remorse for all the things he'd done and the pain he was about to cause her.

"So, I've been thinking about it," she started, hooking strands of hair behind her ear. "About my confession."

 _Shit._

"It's just, I think, I mean, I'm not about to take it back and tell you it was a lie. Rather, I think, when I told you that I love you, I was telling you that I want to be here for you. There are all different kinds of love and I just, you know, maybe ours is supposed to be like this. Two friends who are moving on with their lives together."

 _Shit. Shit. Shit._

"Levy." Gajeel reached across the table for her hand. "Shrimp, don't say anything else. Not here."

He noticed that surrounding customers were watching them. The conversation could easily be heard in such a small space. His chest felt tight.

"You're right. I'm sorry," she said.

With their burgers eaten and paid for, Gajeel was quick to escape the suffocating atmosphere and the heated, imposing glances of fellow customers. He'd never cared what people thought about him until he started walking by Levy's side. They wandered into the park in an attempt at walking off their meals, thoughts of Levy struggling to bite into her oversized burger forcing him to crack a smile every now and then.

"Hey, Gajeel," Levy said, tugging the end of his shirt to stop him in his tracks.

"What is it, Shrimp?" He glanced down to find her rummaging through her bag.

"I could never find the right time to give this to you but, well, I think now is that time."

Gajeel stared at the photograph as she held it out to him. It was the one from his desk, the one of him and Belno. "Levy..."

"I'm sorry. I know I'm meddling again. It's just, you know, I wish I had photos of my parents that I could look at when I'm feeling lonely. I don't want you to feel that way, too."

"Let's take a picture," he said, shoving the photo in his back pocket alongside the piece of paper.

"Huh?"

"A photo. You deaf?"

"I-I'm sorry. Okay. Here, we can use my phone."

After six attempts at taking a picture with both their faces in it, Levy finally settled on one she liked. Dropping her phone into her bag, she let herself take in her surroundings for the first time, dark eyes glowing under the invasive power of afternoon sunlight.

"What you said in the café before, is it true?" he asked, referring to what she'd said about her confession.

Her face lit up, inflicting a mild case of second-hand embarrassment on Gajeel as he waited for her response. "I did. I meant it."

"You love me like a friend?" he asked.

"Yeah." She wasn't lying and yet, somehow, there was a flicker of hurt in her eyes. She loved him like a friend but, in the end, Gajeel knew there was more to it than that. He'd felt it when they kissed.

"Lots of friends kiss by accident when they're drunk," she said. "Lucy kisses me all the time."

Gajeel's fingertips flexed with a growing swirl of anger. "It was my first, you know."

Levy's cheeks were ravished by a growing swell of heat. "M-mine too."

Every inch of him ached as the resounding echo of her words rattled through him. He forced her back against the tree behind them, the tree where he'd first come to realise just how vulnerable she was. The tree where she'd stopped to rest after searching tirelessly for a cat that wasn't hers.

"What are you doing? Stupid Gajeel."

"You're the one who's stupid," he snapped. "You spend so much time reading those damn books you can't even see what's in front of you any more. Your reality is messed up."

"Then what is my reality?" she gasped, biting back with words that roused whatever he'd been hiding in the very core of his being. "If you're so smart then why don't you tell me?!"

He was allowed this one selfish moment, wasn't he?

"Your reality," he barked, tilting her head back with his thumb, "is that you're in love with me and you don't know what to do about it."

There were tears in her eyes. "That's because you don't make any sense to me any more. One minute you're blowing me off and the next you're throwing me against a door and kissing me. What am I supposed to be say to that? What am I supposed to think, Gajeel?! And now, today, you invite me on a date and you buy me new shoes and you take pictures with me." Levy paused to catch her breath. "You know what, I'm worth more than this."

"You finally get it," he laughed. Levy needed to understand her worth. She needed to know that she deserved better.

"Get what?" she sighed. "I don't understand this any more. What do you want from me, Gajeel? Tell me."

"I want you to shut up," he said, leaning in until their noses touched, "and kiss me."

"Another honest answer," she noticed, standing on her toes to snake her arms around his neck. Their second kiss was less passionate than their first, slow enough that Gajeel found himself able to memorise the soft shape of her lips but warm enough to rekindle the spark of that night.

"I'm leaving, Levy," he whispered, pulling back to retrieve the paper in his back pocket. "The man I've been working for pulled some strings and got me into the Police Academy where his Grandson works. I leave for Oshibana in a few days."

"How long..."

"I was told I'll be gone for a minimum of nineteen weeks," he said, placing the acceptance letter in her hand.

"What about your apartment? Are you..."

"Old man Makarov said he'll pay my share of the rent while I'm gone. I've been doin' jobs for him over the past two years that he never paid for," Gajeel mumbled, recalling how Makarov had helped him get back on his feet and how he'd refused to take money, or charity, as he'd called it back then, from him. "He insisted. I'll need you to take care of Lily until then."

"Of course," she sobbed, touching the corner of her trembling lips.

"Oi, Shrimp, don't you start crying on me. Meeting you helped me make this decision. I wanna do for people what you did for me. That's why I won't ask you to sit around and wait for me. Live your life while I'm gone." Gajeel's heart was in his throat. "You deserve to meet someone who isn't an unreliable gang member with an insatiable appetite for trouble."

"Insatiable," she laughed, wiping a tear from her cheek. "You've been listening to me read again, haven't you?"

"A little bit," he confessed.

"I'm really proud of you, Gajeel."

He wondered why fate had such a funny way of trying to tear them apart. He knew if he chose to stay, chose to be beside her, that she'd accept him with her whole heart. But he didn't deserve her in this state. Maybe he never would. That's why he'd go to Oshibana Town and make something of himself. become someone she could be proud of. And then, maybe, he'd get a job saving lives and changing troubled kids just like him. Maybe he could finally make up for all the rotten things he had done. Even if she couldn't wait for him, even if she fell in love with someone else, what she'd done for him would always remain true.

"Belno would be laughin'," he smiled.

"She'd be so proud of you, Gajeel."

"Yeah. Yeah, she would," he agreed, albeit bashfully.

Falling against him, Levy clutched his shirt and buried her face against his chest. He let her stay there, silently willing her tears away as she fought to suppress her sobs. He wondered if she'd meet somebody else while he was gone. Someone who wouldn't make her cry like this. Who wouldn't torment her like he did. He knew he'd snagged a victory in some ways - her first kiss. Her first love. But part of him wasn't satisfied with that. Part of him wanted her to wait.

"Thank you for my shoes. I was really happy," she whispered.

"I know," was all he said.

"I've never been on a date before."

"I know," he said again.

"I love you, Gajeel."

Those words were nearly enough to cripple him. He wanted to explain the gnawing ache in his chest. Wanted to tell her that he'd probably loved her since the day she'd cried at his father's funeral. Maybe even before then. That the things she hated about herself made it possible for him to laugh when the vengeful reminder of his past threatened to choke him to death. He wanted to fall to his knees and beg her, with every selfish bone in his body, to wait for him. To love him until her last breath.

Instead, Gajeel placed a comforting hand on her head and said, "I know."

* * *

 _Oh I do love to make things hard for my children. Hahaha. Their separation actually serves a greater purpose that will bring about the eventual conclusion of this fic: Levy's growth as an individual. I have a little surprise set up for the NaLu fans, too, so watch out for that in future chapters. I have some steamy moments lined up and a lot of fluff, so I hope that'll make up for all the interruptions I keep putting you guys through. Hahaha. ~_


	12. Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

**A/N: I do love me some serious pining. xD**

* * *

 **Chapter Twelve: Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder**

* * *

 _ _ _If I could change the world overnight -  
there'd be no such thing as goodbye.  
You'd be standing right where you were  
and we'd get the chance we deserve.___

* * *

Levy's squeal echoed through the lobby long after it was over - long after she realised, while pounding on Gajeel's door, that no one was going to answer. The remnants of her excitement washed away with the sound, ghosting through her mind to leave a temporary stain on her heart. How many times had she found herself talking to his empty apartment now? Just like the amount of insults he'd used on her in the past, Levy had lost count.

"Right," she whispered, lowering her gaze to the folded letter in her hand. "He's not here."

Retreating to her apartment, embarrassed and ashamed of herself for losing her composure, Levy spread the letter out on the counter and weighed it down with her half-empty mug. Lily scampered up onto the counter to get a look at the paper, mewling his approval when she leaned over to scratch under his chin.

"We got an interview, Lily," she said, the excitement returning in little bubbles that popped and spluttered their way through her body. "You and me, we're finally going to make it big."

Lily seemed content with her words and more-so when she moved to scratch behind his ears. It had been a lonely two weeks without Gajeel but, after grieving for a good fourteen days, Levy was finally ready to face the future without him. Besides, it wasn't as though she'd never see him again. Not only did he have to return for Lily, well, he'd promised her that they'd reunite again someday.

"I wonder if Gajeel is working hard," she hummed, lifting Lily off the counter so she could clean the plates from breakfast. "Do you think he's made any new friends, Lily?"

Lily hissed in a way that reminded Levy of quiet laughter.

"You're right," she laughed. "He's probably brooding too much for that. He seemed determined to make it, though. I hope he's okay."

That's right, while she was sitting around feeling sorry for herself, wishing she'd begged him to stay, Gajeel was off making a name for himself. He was fighting to make the people he loved proud. She should do the same.

"I wonder if Lucy has something I can wear to an interview," she mused, digging through drawers for clothes that looked even remotely sensible. Though her interview wasn't for another three days, Levy wanted desperately to be prepared. "I should definitely ask her when I see her tomorrow, right Lily?"

Lily scampered up onto the end of her bed and nodded his agreement. She knew he was probably tired. Levy had kept the light on through the night while reading to the end of Lucy's novel. The emotional journey had brought her to tears and Lily, being his sentimental, protective self, had woken to snuggle at her side.

Fairy Tail had proven to be everything she'd thought it would to be. Levy imagined it would do really well in sales if Lucy ever got around to publishing it. It was the kind of fantasy story every dreamer wanted to read. Heartache, magic, adventures, love, sacrifice. It had everything woven through its pages. Everything.

She wondered if it would be all right to text Gajeel with news of her interview. When they'd said goodbye at the station he'd insisted she only contact him for emergency reasons. It was his way of coping with their situation, she assumed. Or maybe he just hated talking on the phone. She wished she'd said she loved him one more time.

She'd decided that, should her feelings remain uncompromised, Levy would give it her all when they're reunited again. She wouldn't let him ghost by their conversations any more. She wouldn't let him play around with her feelings. This time, for sure, Gajeel would fall head over heels in love with her. That didn't mean she wouldn't adhere to his words, though. Levy would allow herself a chance at new love should it present itself, even if she didn't want it.

"Stupid Gajeel," she muttered. No matter how hard she tried, Levy couldn't shake him from her mind. Whether she stood in a busy line for groceries or sat in the comfort of her bath tub, Levy's thoughts always drifted back to him.

Tracing the width of her bottom lip, Levy allowed herself one last journey into the past. She should have taken the initiative and kissed him goodbye at the station. Maybe then he'd be the first to cave in and call her.

For the sake of restoring her sanity, Levy decided it would be best to contact Lucy about interview apparel before their date tomorrow. It would spare them some time in the long run and, well, it would give Levy's mind something else to focus on.

Or so she thought.

The second she unlocked her screen everything went to Hell. The photo she'd taken with Gajeel stared up at her in an almost obnoxious manner. Even photo-Gajeel had a crooked smile that rendered her immobile while simultaneously making her want to punch him.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" she yelled, causing Lily to jump up in surprise. "This has to stop. I have to say goodbye to Gajeel Redfox for good."

Swiping through her phone, Levy took a temporary photo of Lily curled up on her bed and set it as her new wallpaper. It would do for now, she figured. Maybe she'd get Lucy to take a new picture with her when she arrived. Before closing the photo gallery, Levy took one final look at the picture commemorating their first date, if she was allowed to call it that. Why did she have to be so damn smitten? Did absence really make the heart grow fonder or had Gajeel succeeded at driving her insane?

"Okay," she sighed. "Maybe not for good."

* * *

"Did you like it?! Really?!"

Levy banged her fist on the bar. "I love it, Lucy! It was incredible!"

"I'm so glad! You're my first reader and I really, _really_ , wanted you to like it."

Cana flashed a grin from the opposite side of the bar. "Hey, try not to break my bar with your celebrating."

Lucy laughed at that. "Sorry, Cana! We'll behave!"

"You two ready to order now?" Cana asked, gesturing to the empty bar in front of them. They'd been so occupied with Lucy's novel that they'd forgotten to order drinks in the first place, which is generally how things go when a person walks into a bar.

"Sure," Levy said, dipping into her cardigan pocket for loose change.

"Oh, Levy, I'm sorry - we didn't even get around to talking about your interview! I brought some clothes like you asked me to. I'll show them to you when we get back to your place."

"It's okay, really. I'm just glad to see you."

"Are you eating okay?" Lucy asked.

"Of course. I don't need Gajeel to cook for me, you know."

"I know that. I just, I also know how hard it is when someone you love says goodbye."

"Lucy, really, I'm..."

"So what'll it be, ladies?" Cana asked, running a cloth through a wet glass before strategically dumping it on a shelf underneath the bar.

Levy considered her options before leaning back on her stool and saying, "I think I'll have some of that red berry stuff from last time. It was _so_ good."

Cana laughed at that. "'Red berry stuff' for Levy, and, for you, Lucy?"

Lucy scratched her cheek before leaning in close to make her order. "Lemonade, please. No ice."

"You're not drinking tonight?" Levy asked. "I thought we were going to 'party like we're college students avoiding a term paper'. Your exact words."

"I forgot how incredible your memory is." Lucy shook her head and smiled. "But, sorry, I can't drink alcohol tonight."

It wasn't until Cana returned with her drinks that realisation sank through Levy like an anchor wedged into the ocean floor, dragging her deeper and deeper until she had no choice but to surrender to the violent pull of it. "You're pregnant!"

Lucy's eyes widened. "You got that from me drinking lemonade?!"

Levy slammed a hand on the bar. "You're not denying it!"

" _Bar_ ," Cana reminded her.

Lucy's cheeks flushed. "Shhhhh. I haven't even told Natsu yet."

"What?! Why not?"

"Well, I'm planning to surprise him. He's away for work right now. It's been killing me keeping this a secret! I wanted to tell you as soon as I saw you but I didn't want to make this night about me. You're the one who deserves to be celebrating. You've finally got your big chance."

"Don't be silly! You're having a baby! I got an interview, it's not like I got the job," Levy insisted. "So, how far along _are_ you?"

"Nine days. I went to the doctor for a more accurate test yesterday, that's why it took me a while to answer your text." Lucy paused to sip at her lemonade. "I mean, nine days, you know, what is it? Post-ovulation? I knew something was wrong when two weeks went by and didn't get my... Well, you know. They're estimating that fertilisation likely happened nine days ago and so I should expect to start feel exhausted and crampy and all that other fun stuff."

"Lucy... I'm so happy for you. Really. I can't believe it."

"I was worried that I might be a little too young to be a mother," she said. "But then I realised, after thinking about my parents, that mothering doesn't come with age. You don't suddenly grow up and know how to be a parent. When I finally put those feelings aside I realised just how lucky I am."

"Twenty-three isn't _that_ young," Levy insisted. "Besides, it's your birthday soon. You'll be twenty-four. And, regardless of that, you'll be a great mother. You took care of me, didn't you?"

Lucy giggled into her fist. "I guess you're right about that."

"I can't believe you're having a baby," Levy sighed. "Where is the time going? Everyone's so grown up and I'm stuck in a crappy apartment pining for a guy who won't even respond to my texts."

"That's because you have to text him to get a response," Lucy teased. "Just send him a message. I'm sure he won't complain. And if he does, who cares? You can hang up or, you know, ignore his texts."

"I can't do that. I told him I'd only contact him in an emergency. We're both trying to be adults about this."

"Levy, when two people like each other they generally want to talk to each other. I'm pretty sure he's sitting there staring at his phone just as much as you are. Hopefully not while they're doing practice drills, but, even then, what I've said stands true."

Levy sighed. "I don't want to be the one who caves in first."

"Levy, love isn't a game. There are no winners or losers when it comes to a relationship. Natsu and I would never get anywhere if we spent all our time dwelling on who was the victor in our relationship. You have just as much right to text him as you have to miss him, okay?"

"Lemonade," Cana interrupted, sliding the glass over to Lucy. "And for you, Levy, a special glass of 'red berry stuff'."

Levy's cheeks warmed. "Thanks, Cana."

"Don't get too rowdy tonight," Cana teased. "Pregnant women shouldn't do any heavy lifting."

"I-I'm not heavy!" Levy gasped.

Cana's laughter trailed through the room as she left the bar to go collect glasses from empty tables. Levy trailed her fingertip across the rim of her glass as she watched the red liquid bubble and pop in a futile attempt at escaping its cage.

"I don't want my life to revolve around Gajeel's feelings for me," Levy admitted, watching as a bubble freed itself from her drink and floated dangerously close to the top of her glass before exploding against her fingertip. "If I can become more independent then I won't be a burden to him. I don't want to spend the rest of my life second-guessing myself."

Lucy wiped a tear from her cheek, startling Levy in the process.

"Lucy?! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to-"

"You're already so grown up," Lucy said, fanning her cheeks with her hands in an exaggerated manner. "One day, I know you'll see yourself how I see you."

"Lucy," Levy cried, snaking her arms around the blonde's shoulders. "I love you so much!"

Cana snaked an arm around the two of them on her way back to the bar. "Jeez, share some of that love with me, too."

The three of them shared a moment of laughter before Cana returned to her usual place behind the bar. Even Cana, Levy realised, was making something of herself. She'd found the courage to find her real father and now, against all odds, she worked in his bar. All of her friends had shown so much courage.

Levy wanted to be brave, too.

"And now we'll share that love with Gajeel," Lucy said, snatching Levy's phone from her pocket and racing across the bar with it.

"Hey! Lucy! Be careful! A pregnant woman shouldn't run around like that!" Levy laughed, leaping off her stool to pursue her meddling friend. "Please! Lucy! Come back with my phone!"

"Make me!" she called, waving the phone above her head.

If Levy wasn't traumatised she might've laughed a little louder.

* * *

After spending the majority of the evening scolding Lucy for her antics and trying on her friend's clothes, Levy had settled for sulking indefinitely and wearing a typical blouse and skirt to her interview. Now, in the silence of her own company, Levy had one last job to take care of: the shoes.

She wasn't exactly spoiled for choice, but the emotional attachment she had to the only pair of shoes that seemed to match her outfit made it all the more difficult to make a decision. She wasn't sober enough for reason and wasn't drunk enough to approach things lightly. Would it be wrong to take a little of Gajeel with her? If she were to be hired in these shoes, would she always associate her success with Gajeel?

"Why am I thinking so deeply about this?" Levy groaned. "They're just shoes."

Pulling them out of the drawer and setting them beside Lucy's clothes, Levy shrank to her knees and took a quick glance around the room. Gajeel would normally be home around this time of night, she realised. She'd sometimes smell his cooking through the wall and find herself absently drifting towards the hole to taste the scent on her tongue. One time he'd actually shoved a wrap through the hole for her to eat. It seemed like, no matter what she did, Gajeel was always one step ahead of her.

Her eyes settled on the window he'd fixed, making it impossible for Lily to escape any more. She remembered how much he'd complained that day. He was the sort of person who didn't like to watch others relax while he worked.

 _Why couldn't she stop thinking about him?_

Lily was curled up on one of her beanbags, sound asleep in the silence of Levy's apartment. It was the first time in weeks that her neighbours across the hall hadn't been yelling at each other. It was certainly a nice change of pace. If Gajeel were home he'd likely make a joke about one of them being dead and Levy would pick a fight with him about how distasteful it was.

"'Live your life while I'm gone'," she said in a deep voice. "Who are you kidding, jerk?"

It felt like he'd said those words on purpose, knowing, with his whole heart, that Levy's life revolved around his existence. Everything had started with that stupid hole and so it would no doubt end. If only she could figure out where to go from here. Well, the interview would likely help.

Collapsing onto her back, Levy thought about their lives up until this point. Gajeel had always been alone in his own mind, he'd never understood the compassion of those around him. She wondered if he would continue to run away from the people who loved him, or if he'd finally accept the support of the people around him. She wanted him to make friends. Lots of friends, even. She wanted him to laugh with them and share secrets with them. Of course, part of her wanted Gajeel all to herself, but the part that loved him, that wanted him to be happy, would give up her feelings for him in a heartbeat if it meant guiding him towards a brighter future.

A sudden vibration in her pocket dropped Levy from Gajeel's future and slammed her right back into the present.

1 New Message.

"Oh, maybe she figured out how to tell Natsu about the baby," Levy said with a grin, holding her phone in the air and opening the message with the hopes of seeing a plan in action.

She didn't - and it wasn't Lucy.

 _Knock 'em dead, Shrimp._

Levy's heart began to pound erratically in her ears. She could almost hear his voice through the screen, hear the snide remark that would no doubt follow it and the quick attempt at putting out the fuse he'd just lit. Having deleted the sent message, Lucy had brushed off Levy's panic by saying she couldn't possibly have typed out a message in the time it had taken Levy to seize her arms behind her back. She'd lied.

What was she supposed to do now? She couldn't possibly respond to him, could she?

As if to end her mental dilemma, the phone vibrated in her hands a second time. Levy swiped her screen to reveal a photo of Gajeel and a mixed group of men and women she didn't recognise, all dressed in uniform. They must've been his fellow trainees, she realised, a pang of jealousy slowing her heartbeat when she noticed how beautiful the other women were. That effect didn't last long, however, when she noticed how handsome he looked in his uniform. Her entire body flushed at the sight of him.

 _If you don't get the job I'll come and arrest you._

Levy shivered in response to his threat. The phone fell out of her hands and hit her face with a painful, decisive thwack.

"You win," she groaned, swatting the phone to the ground. "I surrender."

* * *

 _I really wanted to cover Levy's time apart from Gajeel and her desire to grow as a person in this chapter. I have no real intention of dragging out their separation since this story revolves a great deal around their growth as friends and, of course, as lovers. So you'll be seeing a number of time skips next chapter. If you want to see chapters of their time apart you're more than welcome to request them for Anamnesis. :)_

 _Also, quick note: there is a reason Lucy discovered (or, rather, assumed) she was accidentally pregnant early on and I intend to show that in Anamnesis for the NaLu fans. I didn't deem it necessary to the main story since the only information I wanted to pass over was that she was pregnant and Natsu didn't know about it yet, so Levy was the first to be told._


	13. A Time Of Giving

**A/N: I'm so, so sorry for the delay with this update! I've been fluctuating between illness and work and, honestly, I just haven't had the time or energy until now. I hope this was at least worth a semblance of the wait.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirteen: A Time Of Giving**

* * *

 _ _ _If I close my eyes and imagine you are here,  
it'll last for a while before you disappear.  
So I close my eyes 'cause the only thing I fear  
is waking up one day forgetting you were ever here.___

* * *

Levy's bag thumped to the ground as she balanced four cups of coffee, two bagels and an assortment of packaged goods on her free arm. Relieved of its burden, her left hand cleared the edge of Evergreen's desk to make room for the variety of treats she'd been asked to retrieve. Setting them on the cleared surface, Levy took a moment to catch her breath. There were at least twice the amount of stairs in this building than there were in her apartment complex, and each was narrower and more deadly than she cared to admit. Levy had lost count of how many times she'd climbed each of them today alone.

Truth be told, Levy's interview hadn't landed her the job of her dreams - but meeting Evergreen _had_ opened the door for opportunity. Being offered a paid Internship made the four years spent in University seem like a blow to the face, but, as Lucy had put it over the phone, all flowers start from the beginning of the cycle. Levy was a seed beginning to sprout. If she worked hard enough maybe she'd blossom into something beautiful as well.

Or maybe she'd whither and die before she ever got the chance.

Evergreen's office overflowed with plants and intricate little statues of fairies that consumed the majority of shelves. Levy thought the flowers were beautiful to look at, especially in the thick of the Winter season. She could hardly believe that six months ago she'd been interviewing for a job at Magnolia's publishing corporation and now, in the launch of December, she was finally here. As an Intern, sure. But she'd made it. It had taken some time for them to clear an opening but, with Mirajane's help, Levy had landed a slot. It just so happened that Mira's brother, Elfman, was in the midst of dating Evergreen, who watched over the company in her boss' absence.

Levy could barely fathom how small the world seemed of late.

Many of the smaller statues had been used as bookends for the books the company had successfully published and, as a result, sold millions of copies. It was for that reason that Levy loitered in Evergreen's office long after she should have vanished to attend to her many other menial tasks.

Approximately fifteen minutes later Evergreen wandered into her office, books in one arm, papers in the other. She dumped the stack onto her desk and, deliberately ignoring Levy for the time being, swiped a cup of coffee off the table and collapsed in the seat at her desk. She let out a long sigh as she swigged desperately from the cardboard cup.

"We need to fix the elevator soon," she sighed. "These shoes were not made for climbing stairs."

Levy laughed at that. She was reminded of the time she'd worn heels to Oak Town. Gajeel had had to carry her in the end. She was beginning to think that heels of any kind were made specifically for disaster.

"Oh, Levy," Evergreen said, as though just now laying eyes on her four week old Intern. "About that book you asked me to read..."

Levy rose up on her toes in anticipation.

"I haven't gotten around to it yet," she said, waving a hand over the many piles of books on her desk, "but I thought of a way to compromise."

Levy leaned forward with intrigue. "What is it?"

"Freed is looking for help in the editorial department," Evergreen went on, nudging the books closer to Levy. "Why don't you take these and offer him some assistance. That's your field of expertise according to your resume, isn't it?" Evergreen paused to adjust the bridge of her glasses. "With some free time on my hands I may be able to look at your friend's book. And you, in the meantime, will get the experience you've been wanting."

Levy's heart sped into a frantic burst of excited beating. "Really?!"

With the approach of December, Levy had spent the majority of November begging Lucy to re-lend her the book she'd written. Convinced that Levy wanted to read Fairy Tail a second time due to loneliness, Lucy had surrendered it in the end. Levy had written the book proposal herself and, with a great deal of stressing and effort and performing tasks that weren't her own, had convinced Bickslow to hand the book to Evergreen. Now, in December, Evergreen was finally going to look it over.

It was to be Levy's gift to Lucy this year for all the wonderful things she had done.

"I expect you to complete your other tasks as well," Evergreen said.

"I will. I definitely will."

"We break for the holidays on the twenty third," she went on. "I'll have my answer by then."

If Levy wasn't a little bit terrified of Evergreen she would've hugged the incredible woman. "Thank you so much."

"Here, take one of these to Freed," she said, handing a cup of coffee to Levy. "He's been up all night fretting over one of the latest submissions. See if you can soothe him."

Levy nodded and, with a chant of _thank you so much_ , was rushing out of the office. Suddenly, the many flights of stairs didn't seem so daunting.

* * *

"Evergreen is a woman of her word," Freed explained, glancing up from the open book on his desk to appraise Levy with cool reassurance.

"I hope so," Levy said, adjusting the height of her seat beside him to reach for one of the books on the massive pile. "Lucy has done so much for me. This is the only way I can think of to thank her properly."

"Did you retrieve your bag?" he asked then, raising a brow and smirking a flicker of amusement in her direction.

"Yeah..." Levy rubbed the back of her head and gestured to the bag resting against her ankle. "I was so excited about the news I left it in Evergreen's office. I've never been so exhausted. For a minute there I thought I could physically _see_ time."

Freed laughed at that. It was a majestic sound that seemed to match his elegant disposition.

"Evergreen is a sentimental person. She'll read the book so that you have the news before we leave for the holidays. The only reason she's making you work for it is because she wants to spend time with Elfman."

Levy smiled at that. "I know how she feels."

"Your boyfriend must be missing you. You're the first to arrive and the last to leave every day," Freed observed, flipping a page of his book. She'd been mesmerised for weeks with his uncanny ability to read _and_ converse at the same time. Fluent in many more languages than her, Freed had become an inspiration to Levy.

"Actually, I don't have a boyfriend," she confessed. "I mean, I love him, but Gajeel is busy working hard to complete the additional training he set on. We haven't made anything official yet. I don't know if we ever will."

"So that's why he hasn't fixed the elevator," Freed mused, mostly to himself.

"I'm sorry?"

"The person you're referring to is Gajeel Redfox, correct?"

Levy's heart fluttered. "Um, yeah. That's right."

"The man who owns this building is Makarov Dreyar, grandfather of our boss, Laxus Dreyar. He often brought Gajeel in to do tasks of a mechanical nature. Fitting light bulbs, fixing chairs, building desks and, sometimes, even tinkering with the elevator system."

So that's what he was doing in the middle of the day.

"Actually," Freed went on, "Gajeel mentioned you to us once before. That's why, when your name cropped up on our list of interviewees, I came to greet you myself. I wanted to see the kind of woman responsible for making a good man of Gajeel Redfox."

Levy was dumbfounded.

"It bothered him that one word to Makarov could get you a permanent job here. He knew you wouldn't want the help, so he left you in the dark. It was his way of helping you...grow."

Levy's eyes filled with tears. Focusing on the book in front of her, she flipped it open and stared absently at the words on the pages. "Stupid Gajeel..."

"He'll return soon enough," Freed said, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Hopefully before you leave your bag in Evergreen's office again."

Levy couldn't breathe against the fit of laughter that erupted from within her. Every inch of herself seemed to explode with the sound, tingling and shivering as a whorl of emotion poured out of her body.

"Let's finish up and head to lunch," Freed said, returning his attention to the book on his desk. "I'll see what I can do about encouraging Evergreen to hurry along the process of reading your friend's book."

Levy wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Thank you so much."

* * *

It was the evening of December fourteenth that Evergreen marched into a bustling editorial department and dropped a thick stack of papers on Levy's desk. Freed stared up at his childhood friend with a pleasant smile, the kind of smile that told Levy she should remain quiet.

Harsh wind rattled the windows of the large room, casting silence to the shadows as faces turned to get a look at Evergreen's placid expression. She didn't look angry, nor did she look pleased, though she wore apathy as beautifully as she wore anything else.

Levy sank deep into her seat.

"This is your next project. I expect you to read it thoroughly and work on a marketing strategy. I want this released in time for the holidays," Evergreen instructed.

"But Ever, we can't possibly..." Freed started, trailing off when he laid eyes on the project on Levy's side of the desk.

"And you, Miss McGarden, will be joining us on the editorial team next year. We've gotten twice the work done this past week than in previous months." Evergreen smiled and nudged her glasses higher up the bridge of her nose. "Welcome to the team."

Levy's eyes widened in disbelief as Evergreen, seemingly pleased with herself, stalked away. The room fell into a quiet chatter, people turning to ask their neighbours if any of them had heard what Evergreen had said.

"What... What just happened?" she stammered.

"Take a look at the papers in front of you," Freed told her.

Levy's gaze dropped to the manuscript on her desk. She peeled back the assortment of letters on top to find the title page.

Fairy Tail.

"She..."

"She loved it," Freed said. "Evergreen never pushes a project like this unless she's certain it will make a profit."

"She's... She's going to publish Lucy's novel?"

Freed nodded with a smile. "Congratulations. I'll photocopy the confirmation letters so you can gift them to your friend when you see her. You should bring her in next time she's here."

Levy, with a hand over her mouth and a fist clenched in her lap, stared in disbelief at the papers on her desk. She'd done it. She'd gotten Lucy's novel published.

And she'd gotten a promotion in the process.

"I can't..."

"Believe it?" Freed laughed. "I can tell. Your face is beat red."

"I have to tell Gajeel," she gasped, rising from her seat.

She wan't sure which part of her thought it best to tell Gajeel first, but she knew deep down that she wanted to, and today she was going to heed Lucy's advice. Love isn't a game. Affection, attention, it isn't meant to be passed back and forth like a tennis ball being tossed over a net. The ball wasn't in his court one second and in hers the next. They both carried the means of making things work.

"You should call him," Freed said.

"Is that okay?"

"Yes, I'll look over Evergreen's instructions while you make the call."

Levy's whole body tingled with excitement. She snatched her phone from the depths of her bag and raced out into the hallway. This time there would be no hesitation. She would call him. No walls of text. No late night pictures. This time, Levy would hear his voice.

Too bad Gajeel didn't answer in the end.

* * *

Lucy, overcome by tears, stared at the papers with hypnotic disbelief. It had only been two days since Levy had received the news - and Gajeel had missed and ignored seven of her calls - but the weekend had circled around and Levy had insisted on seeing Lucy before the holidays commenced.

"Levy... I don't know what to say."

"You're a writer; you always know what to say," Levy teased.

"I haven't been this happy since the women at my birthing group expressed their insane jealousy over my small baby bump."

Levy stifled a laugh. "You make pregnancy look beautiful, Lucy."

"I felt bad for using my father's reputation to fuel my paranoia and get that test done so early," Lucy admitted, "but I'm glad I did. I couldn't have waited much longer to find out for sure. It would've killed me off."

"Did you decide on a name yet?" Levy asked, forgetting the novel for a moment to talk about Lucy's miracle.

"I'm thinking of calling him Nysa," Lucy said. "I had already chosen Fay for a girl but, when we found out we're having a boy, I had to return to my list of ideas."

"Nysa..." Levy smiled.

"As far as I know it means 'the goal'," Lucy explained. "But I actually read it in one of Jellal's books when he visited with Erza. Nysa is the name of a group of asteroids in the Main Belt. I thought it was perfect. Nysa Dragneel."

Levy's smile widened. "It's amazing, Lucy."

"You're amazing," she said. "I can't believe you did this, Levy."

Cana leaned over the bar to rub Lucy's belly in an overly exaggerated manner. "You sure you're having a baby, Lu? You haven't been eating too much?"

Lucy's face heated. " _Cana_."

"My old man really wants to meet him, you know," Cana went on with a laugh. "Natsu was always like a son to him. That's why Gildarts said he'd come home when the baby is born."

Lucy's eyes widened. "Today is the day that just keeps on giving, huh? And being pregnant makes me want to cry even more than usual."

Cana rolled her eyes. "Sure. That's it."

Levy's smile made her cheeks hurt. It was easy to forget the missed calls and the apparent disappearance of the man she loved when so many good things were happening. She wouldn't burden anyone with her concerns just yet.

He was probably busy.

The walk home that night was painful. Snow hung on Levy's clothes and, not entirely sobered up after their celebratory drinks - or, rather, _her_ celebratory drinks - the walk up to her apartment had been thoroughly exhausting and complicated. Her entire body was numb with the cold.

Fumbling with the lock on her door, Levy swung it open to reveal a dark room and a very lethargic cat sprawled out on the ground. Lily rolled over at the sound of her coming into the room and quickly scampered up to her feet.

"Good evening," she purred, hunkering down to stroke his head. "Did you eat the food I left for you?"

Lily mewled confirmation that he had.

"Can you believe I got an editorial job, Lily? I wanted to tell Stupid Gajeel but Stupid Gajeel didn't answer his Stupid Phone."

Lily looked to the wall where Levy had placed a hook to hang Gajeel's gifted photo frame. The hook was empty - and the hole, which she'd covered up with the photo that now lay on the carpet, _was gone_. Levy's bag slid from her shoulder, hit the ground with a thud, and startled Lily into a sprint across the room.

Groping for the key Gajeel had left her, Levy climbed to her feet, gathered her senses, raced out into the lobby and worked to unlock Gajeel's door. She swung it open to find empty darkness lurking inside. Empty, because Gajeel's clutter, save an empty bed frame and the worn couch, was gone. She swung open cupboard doors to find them devoid of cutlery, of pans, and of food he'd left behind.

Everything was gone.

Not quite ready to collapse to her knees, Levy staggered out of Gajeel's apartment and gripped the door frame until her knuckles turned white. She hadn't made it three steps into the lobby when a shadow fell over the ground and stretched out to meet her feet.

"Trespassing is an arrestable offence," a voice said to her left.

Levy kept her eyes on the floor. "Ah, no, I was just checking something for a friend. He left me his key and..." Before the first tears could fall, Levy glanced up at the figure standing in front of her.

Gajeel met her gaze with a fierce kind of welcome that made her blood boil with a mixture of anger and relief. He was wearing the uniform of Magnolia's police. She recognised the emblem on his chest pocket.

"Gajeel..."

"Miss me, Levy?"

"Not even a little!" she yelled, much to her surprise.

"Huh?! Is that any way to-"

Overcome with emotion, Levy stomped past him into her apartment and slammed the door behind her. Pressed up against it, she let out a few heavy breaths and considered her options. If she punched him - the pain would likely be worse on her end. She didn't exactly have the kind of knuckles that could withstand the bite of steel. He wore too many piercings to fall victim to a dainty little fist like hers.

Gajeel knocked on the door.

Closing her eyes, Levy turned the handle and spun around to face the lobby. She met his gaze once again, a swirl of affection melting in her blood. She couldn't decide what she wanted more - him or his explanation.

"Look, Levy, I wanted to-"

Levy took a bold step forward, seized his collar in her hands, and leaned up on her toes to kiss him. She savoured the flavour of his lips and the shock that kept him so limp, so still, she thought he'd fallen asleep standing up.

With the kiss ended he measured the weight of emotion in her eyes and, with a deep breath, walked her back into her apartment. Slamming the door closed behind himself, Gajeel spun them around, pushed her back against the door, and planted his lips on hers once again. The way his mouth crashed against hers was clumsy and filled with such fervency she thought her skin would light on fire.

"I missed you," she gasped into their kiss, sliding her fingers up into his hair as he embraced her in his oppressive arms. "I missed you every day."

"Thank God," he breathed, hiking her legs up around his waist to carry her back towards her bed.

"Stupid Gajeel," she moaned when his lips found her neck and began kissing their way along her shoulder.

He dropped her on the bed with a force that nearly jolted her off the mattress, but failed to do so when he climbed over her. With their lips coming together for another passionate kiss, Levy snaked her arms around his neck and lost herself to whatever part of her recognised the moment as real. She'd dreamt of things like this before - with him - since he'd been gone. Dreamt of holding him in her arms, of kissing him, and of loving him.

"You're under arrest for trespassing," he snickered, pressing his tongue flat against her collar bone.

"Gajeel..." she breathed, forgetting the empty apartment and the missed calls and every second she'd spent pining over his absence.

He kissed up her shoulder towards her ear, where he grazed her earlobe with his teeth. "I love you, Levy McGarden."

Levy's eyes filled with tears. " _I know._ "

* * *

 _I fly to the USA on the 30th of May so I intend to update this fic while I'm there. My Fiance will be at work all week so I'll have plenty of time to write! Thank you for being so patient, I really do have the best readers._


	14. A Day Of Firsts

A/N: So toxineena insisted I write their first time in detail (I had intended to skip it over). Hahaha. All graphic sexual content is _sectioned_ by [x-x-x] as to be avoided if necessary. :)

* * *

 **Chapter Fourteen: A Day Of Firsts**

* * *

 _ _ _So baby come light me up and maybe I'll let you on it.  
___ _ _ _A little bit dangerous, but baby that's how I want it.  
A little less conversation and a little more touch my body.  
'Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you.___

* * *

Gajeel came to sit against the bathroom door, which stood ajar to allow a single shaft of light deep inside the room. Levy could see strands of his long black hair from where she sat in the middle of the bath. The whisper of a candle flame she'd placed on the edge of the tub danced dangerously close to being extinguished, hot wax dripping down the remaining nub where it eventually gathered inside a red-spotted dish. The spots reminded her of Gajeel's eyes. Even though she knew he wouldn't peek inside, Levy drew her knees to her chest and dipped her hands into the lukewarm water in order to avoid his gaze.

"I'm sorry," came his mumbled apology from the doorway.

Levy sank deeper into the water. Their intimate moment had been cut short when the questions swimming through her mind had unintentionally spilled from her lips. She couldn't proceed with such an act until she knew exactly what was going on. Her mind was too clouded. Her head was spinning.

 _Where was he going? Why didn't he tell her?_

Even so, no matter how she looked at it, no matter how upset she felt, or how much she wanted to ask him, a big part of her - the part that was winning - just wanted to reach for his hand and walk him back to the bed. Either way, Levy couldn't spend the rest of their night sulking in cold bathwater.

"You can stay here," she said, quiet enough that Gajeel had to turn his head in order to listen to what she had to say. Levy took a moment to stare in awe at the side of his face, which looked so much more handsome than she remembered. "I mean, until your new apartment is ready."

Gajeel turned a little more but caught himself before he could make the mistake of peering into the bathroom. "It's only a couple of days. I was just going to stay with old man Makarov until they're finished with the place."

"Then, just for tonight," she whispered, barely able to get the words out as embarrassment consumed her. "I mean, if you want to."

She just couldn't stand the thought of letting their reunion slip through her grasp before she'd finally had a chance to confront her feelings head on. This was her chance. She couldn't waste it.

Gajeel laughed in the doorway. "What? And borrow one of _your_ shirts?"

Levy stifled a laugh, yanked the plug out of the tub and hoisted herself up and out of the bath. Gajeel stayed perfectly still as she reached across the room to snatch a towel from the rail and quickly wrap it around herself. Wiping her feet on the mat, Levy then grabbed her clothes in one arm and, with the other, pushed Gajeel to one side in order to pass him by. She could feel his eyes on her back as she moved through the room towards a pile of clothes she'd been keeping under her bed.

His clothes.

"Your hair is longer," he said, temporarily disarming her train of thought as she groped under her bed for her secret stash.

"What?"

"Your hair." He met her gaze when she stole a quick glance over her shoulder. "It's longer."

Levy unconsciously raked a set of fingers through her damp hair and turned her attention to the floor where droplets of water exploded on the carpet.

"Ya know, that position is pretty good," Gajeel chortled, reminding her that she was still on her hands and knees on the bedroom floor.

Yanking the clothes out from under the bed, Levy tossed the pile of shirts she'd borrowed from him over the months in his direction and used the confusion as an excuse to grab her pyjamas from the pillow, where she'd left them folded that morning. Her heart was aching as she tried to calm herself down.

Opening a set of drawers behind her beanbags, Levy pulled out a pair of pants and quickly tossed them over her head to where he'd started taking off his uniform. She couldn't help but stare at his newly exposed back as he knelt to pluck them from the ground where they'd landed at his feet.

"Are you hoarding my clothes, Levy?"

 _Levy_. He hadn't called her Shrimp in a while. She wondered if it was a sign of his growing respect for her, or if he was doing it on purpose to prove some kind of point. Whatever he was doing - it was working.

"Of course not! Stupid Gajeel! They were in the bottom of the bag you left me, along with Lily's things."

Lily, upon hearing his name, scrambled to Levy's feet as though taking her side in the dispute. Gajeel noticed and offered a baleful scowl in Lily's general direction.

"Turn around," she insisted. "You change over there, I'll change over here."

Gajeel's lips threatened a smile before he did as he was told and turned away from her to take off the rest of his uniform. The subtle click of his belt buckle made her knees weak. She bent to stroke Lily's fur before shedding her towel and tugging her purple nightdress over her head. If only she'd known he would be coming home so soon. She'd have bought something cuter.

Wait, what was she thinking?

While he was occupied, Levy pulled a clean pair of panties out of her drawer and quickly slipped into them while he wasn't looking. Well, at least she was matching...if nothing else.

Rubbing the towel over her wet hair, Levy walked back towards the bathroom when he was finished dressing and draped it over the rail inside. She could hear Gajeel snickering to himself outside. Her hair stood out in an assortment of directions now that it was starting to dry.

Slamming the bathroom door to a close, Levy huffed in frustration and made a hasty effort to brush the dishevelled mess atop her head. She could still hear him laughing through the doorway.

"I hate you!" she yelled.

He didn't respond, but she _did_ hear him shuffling towards the bathroom when he'd finished putting his uniform away. She readied the hair brush above her head and glared at the door as he suddenly pushed it open. The candle was finally snuffed out by the gust of wind created by his entrance. It didn't matter, though, not with the door fully open. She'd have to change the light bulb when she found the time - and the steps to do so.

"So you're part of Magnolia's police force now, huh?" Levy asked, turning to fix her gaze on her reflection in the mirror. "What's that like?"

She tried not to focus too much on her expression, or on the way her features looked so terribly plain next to him. This wasn't the time to be feeling self-conscious.

"It's fine," he said, stepping close enough now that she could feel his chest against her back. "What about you and your new job? Evergreen's a slave driver, eh?"

"It's fine. She's fine." Her shoulder tingled when he lay a hand over the strap of her dress. She fixed her eyes on his in the mirror and watched as something deep down within them changed. He didn't look quite so distant any more.

"You should be careful who you invite into your home," Gajeel said. "There are a lot of criminals out there."

Levy shuddered when he knocked the strap from her right shoulder. The exposed flush of skin looked redder than usual in the artificial light of the room outside.

"Then..." The brush fell out of her hand and hit the bathroom floor with a resounding clatter. "It's a good job I have you here, officer."

Something about what she'd said seemed to spark new life into those fierce red eyes. He leaned in to kiss her exposed shoulder and, in doing so, ignited whatever she'd been holding back. The sensations began to swim around her body in waves, undulating back and forth to the rapid beating of her heart. She tingled with anticipation, with nerves, and, most of all, with need.

"Gajeel..." Levy tipped her head back when he started to kiss the side of her neck. "How come you won't tell me where your new apartment is?"

He smiled against her neck. "How about I show you? When it's ready, o'course."

Levy's entire body trembled. "And you promise, right? No more secrets."

Gajeel ghosted his lips across her right shoulder before spinning her around to face him. "I promise, Levy. Being without you is more terrifying than anything I've ever faced before so, when the time comes, you'll be the first to see my new place. My old man would want this, too."

Gajeel had come into a large sum of money when his father passed away, money that Levy was pleased to see him spending wisely. She'd be lonely without Gajeel as her neighbour, but she was happy to see him moving forward with his life.

"That was surprisingly honest," she said, when she'd finally found her voice.

"Yeah, well, I'm part of the law now. Gotta be honest, ya know?"

She laughed at that. "I'm sorry. About before."

"Huh? About what?"

"I mean...we were..." Though she couldn't be sure, Levy thought Gajeel's face looked redder than usual. " _You know_."

"Oh. That." He looked to be gauging her expression for some kind of hidden motive, a motive he wouldn't find in the sea of confusion he'd spend hours swimming through before resurfacing empty-handed.

"Yeah," she said. " _That_."

She knew it was her fault. She'd done so much rambling that it had ruined the mood. Everything had spilled out at once. It was just all too much too fast. One minute he was ignoring her calls and the next she was practically stumbling out of his apartment and into his arms.

"It was a conversation you needed to have," Gajeel said, rubbing the back of his head. "It's fine, ain't it? There's no rush to do those things. Or. Whatever."

He was definitely embarrassed. "Well... I'm done talking now."

Gajeel blinked at her in silent wonder.

"Do I really have to say it?" she asked, covering her face in one hand. "It's embarrassing."

Gajeel snatched her hand and dragged her out into the main apartment, where they tiptoed past a sleeping Lily and made their way back towards the bed. Levy didn't say a word as he sat her on the end of it and paced the length of the bed.

Levy didn't know what to say as she watched him pacing back and forth. She wondered if she'd made a mistake in bringing up the deed they'd almost done. It's not like they needed to rush into anything, even if what they had felt more like a ten year long marriage than a brand new relationship.

"It's embarrassin' for me too, Idiot," he said, breaking the silence with a sheepish glance at the fallen strap on her right shoulder.

" _What_?"

The bed creaked when he finally stopped pacing to sit beside her. "I said-"

"I know what you said," she interrupted, twisting to get a better look at his face. She placed a comforting hand on his knee. "I just, I wasn't expecting _you_ to feel that way."

It was Gajeel's turn to be confused. " _What_?"

"Well, _I'm_ embarrassed because it's my first time and I'm not exactly-"

"Are you an idiot?" he snorted. "Levy, I spent the majority of my life sulking about my absent father and creating trouble for the people of Oak Town. Before you, I'd never expressed interest in anyone, let alone a...woman."

The blood drained from Levy's face. She'd done it again - she'd passed judgement without ever really looking for the facts. "W-wait, you've never..."

Gajeel shook his head and laughed.

"But you were so..." her words trailed off when he leaned in to kiss her, his left hand reaching up to play with the remaining strap of her dress.

"I was so _what_?" he asked, kissing the corner of her mouth as he pushed the strap from her shoulder and trailed his fingertips across her bare skin.

Levy's chest was heaving from a simple touch. Nerves tangled with her excitement, making her squirm uncomfortably on the bed.

"When you kiss me," Levy paused to bite her lip and placed an embarrassed hand over her face, "it's just so, I don't know. Perfect."

Gajeel moved her hand and leaned in for another kiss, the kind of kiss that made her head reel and relinquish all of her doubts and her thoughts and her confusion. He stole every breath she tried to take, kissing her with a fervency that almost masked their mutual embarrassment in its growing heat. Her fingers curled into a fist on his leg.

"I didn't mean to make you wait this long," he said against her mouth.

Levy snaked her free arm around his neck and hummed into their kiss. "It was worth it."

If it were up to her, Levy would never, ever stop kissing Gajeel. His lips were like her favourite books, no matter how many times she read through them, Levy would never grow tired of their stories, or of their existence in her thoughts.

"Levy," he started, shifting uncomfortably where he sat, "before we, uh, continue, I don't have anything to-"

"I do," she interrupted, knowing exactly what he was referring to.

"You _what_?"

Levy's mind raced back to one of her many dates with Lucy. One day in particular, when they'd taken their adventures out of Cana's reach into the shopping district, Lucy had given Levy a talk that she'd likely _never_ forget. That included forcing poor Levy to take home an assortment of different sized condoms Lucy had acquired during one of her pharmacy hunts.

"Don't ask," she whined. "I'm not sure I'm ready to tell that story right now. Just know that what we need is buried in a box of photographs under my bed."

Gajeel laughed and hoisted her up onto his lap, where she settled her knees on either side of his legs. With both hands on his shoulders, Levy leaned down to place an assortment of kisses on his lips, ranging from quick and breathless to long and inviting.

Levy had to wonder if she was dreaming as she kissed him, uninterrupted by the many obstacles life had thrown their way. The sensations tingling through her certainly felt surreal enough, but, then, there was no denying the warmth of his lips or the hot touch of his calloused fingers pressing against her back through the material of her dress. She crushed her chest against him as she made the most of their new position, kissing him in ways that made the gnawing ache in her stomach tense and grow with need, a need she'd never truly felt before.

Sitting back on his legs, Levy found herself being held captive in Gajeel's imposing eyes. They broke contact but once, when Gajeel pulled his shirt over his head, and even then the moment was so fleeting it was as though she'd never been without his gaze. Levy slid a hand down to his chest, where she allowed herself a moment to marvel at the rapid beating of his heart.

They were the same.

Gajeel pressed a hand against the small of her back and used the other to carefully lower her dress until it fell into a puddle of purple material around her waist. Levy reached up instinctively to cover her naked chest.

"Don't look!" she yelled, using an arm to shield herself while she placed a hand over his eyes. "It's embarrassing. And they're not..."

Gajeel pried her hand off his face and pierced her with an exasperated look that made her whole body tense uneasily.

"What?!" she gasped. "You said it yourself. You're not interested in my small, ugh, you know."

"Levy." Gajeel maintained eye contact as he lowered her arm from her breasts. "When are you going to realise that you're perfect the way you are?"

Levy was dumbfounded.

"You're so damn hard on yourself all the time," he went on. "If you say one more negative thing about my woman, I'll have to _arrest you_."

Levy's mouth hung open in surprise. "Your woman?"

Gajeel smiled a crooked smile that betrayed every sinister, wicked, despicable, conniving through he'd ever had. "You got a problem with that?"

"N-no," she stammered. "I just, I feel sorry for you; having such a plain woman and all."

"That's it. You're under arrest for slander, Levy McGarden."

 **[x-x-x]**

Levy's breath caught in her throat when he leaned in to suddenly run his tongue up and over her right nipple, which came erect the second his hot breath fanned across it. She arched her back against the flat of his hand and absent-mindedly wriggled in his lap as Gajeel went about kissing between her breasts and licking around her nipples. She'd read about this sort of thing in books but never in her wildest dreams could she have imagined that they'd be so damn sensitive to the simplest of touches. A simple flick of his tongue made her whole body shiver.

When he'd done tormenting her, Gajeel slid his free hand up to caress her right breast while he took the nipple of her left between his lips. His experimentation seemed to be working - much to her shame. A simple lap around the circumference of her nipple had her moaning in ways she wished she could suppress, but wouldn't for the simple fact that they made the pleasure seem all the more real.

She squealed in surprise when he abruptly heaved her off his lap and threw her backwards onto the bed. She didn't have time to suppress her giggles when he positioned himself between her legs and kissed her once again. She clenched a fist between her breasts as he kissed her a second time, savouring every breath that poured into her mouth and every subtle shift of his tongue as it brushed against her lips.

Levy raised her hips off the bed when he finally made the move to pull her dress down from her hips. She would've complained about how boring her panties were if he hadn't given her such a touching speech earlier. She didn't want to steal the worth from those words. They meant everything to her.

She stopped him when he reached down for her underwear. "Wait. It's not fair if you have to do everything. I mean..."

"Consider it my way of making up for those missed calls," he insisted.

Levy realised then that he was embarrassed. Not just embarrassed - _insecure._ He wanted to focus entirely on her today in order to avoid his own mental vacillation. His own struggles. Well, she certainly didn't mind. It gave her more time to research and prepare for future reference.

And, besides, embarrassed Gajeel was painfully adorable.

"Okay," she acquiesced. "I _am_ the one under arrest, after all."

Gajeel licked his bottom lip. "If you don't behave I might have to extend your sentence."

Levy's entire body shuddered at the thought. "Maybe I'll rebel a little, then."

Gajeel's smile left a permanent stain on her lips when he kissed her. She couldn't remember a time he'd ever looked so carefree and happy, like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. She hungered to see more of that, to feel that kind of joy pressed against her.

He worked himself out of his pants as he kissed his way down her stomach, leaving ticklish impressions all over her hot skin. She glanced away whenever he caught her staring at him but couldn't fight the ever-growing smile on her face. A kindling restlessness still passed through Levy on occasion, but she knew now more than ever that Gajeel was the one she wanted to give herself to. She wanted her first memory to be with him, even if, somewhere down the line, things didn't work out between them. She wanted this to be a memory that she would always cherish.

Levy squeezed her eyes shut when he hooked a finger inside her panties and slowly shimmied them down her legs. Her skin tingled where his knuckles grazed her legs. It took all her strength not to squeeze her legs shut in embarrassment.

"You better not be staring at it," Levy groaned into her palm. "It's humiliating enough."

She was answered by a single stroke of his fingertip exploring the length of her entrance. The sensation of being touched in such an intimate place roused a gasp from her lips that seemed to echo long after it was gone. Tears stung the corners of her eyes as the overwhelming realisation of what they were about to do finally struck her.

"Tch, somebody's enjoying her punishment," Gajeel chuckled, teasing her entrance with a single fingertip.

"Shut up," she gasped, stomping her feet on the bed.

Gajeel's laughter made her both nervous and excited. She'd never imagined exposing herself like this to anyone. Well, not in reality, anyway. While it was true she didn't spend every night getting acquainted with herself, she'd spent enough curious evenings to know there wouldn't be that much pain.

That thought was comforting, to say the least.

He worked his finger inside her with the kind of gentle precision that elicited quiet moans from Levy's lips and sent a scatter of pleasure exploding throughout her body. Relief poured through her as he penetrated the growing need accumulating between her legs. The dull ache gathering there faded with each gentle stroke of his finger.

Biting the ends of her fingertips, Levy quietened her voice as she allowed him the time he needed to explore and experiment with her body. She felt only mild discomfort every now and then that quickly diminished by the change in motions. When he was satisfied, Gajeel glanced up for permission to proceed.

There was nothing else for him to do that would prepare her further. Not today. They had plenty of time to experiment and play when they were more comfortable and better acquainted with each other.

She didn't notice until he climbed off her to seek the box under the bed that the room had gotten increasingly cold overtime. The nights were uncomfortable in the winter, especially in her old, shoddy apartment building. She could almost taste the frost on the tip of her tongue as she waited for him to return.

Levy caught a quick glance of his backside when he stood to remove his boxers and unwrap the protection he'd found under the bed. The mere sight was enough to invoke memories of their first meeting, and of the _other_ things she'd seen when the hole existed.

He took his position between her legs once again and, while he sat up on his knees, Levy had the perfect opportunity to steal a glance at his erection. Her heart leapt up into her throat at the sight of something so intimate being pressed against her entrance. He rubbed the length against her wet lips, spurring groans and gasps from her mouth as he readied himself for the final act.

"An' you're sure about this, Levy?" he asked.

Levy nodded, her face hot in the aftermath of what she'd just witnessed - and felt. "Of course. I love you, Gajeel."

That was all he needed to hear. Smiling to himself, Gajeel positioned the tip against her entrance and slowly, gently, teased his way inside of her. He came to lean over her as he had before, both hands planted on either side of her head as he eased the tip in and out of her entrance. Levy could hardly breathe as she gazed up into his eyes and witnessed every inch of his affection, of the fragile soul buried deep inside of him.

She threw her arms around his neck when he lowered himself down to kiss her, taking in every inch of discomfort, every inch of pleasure, as the world around her slowed to an impending stop. For now, there was only Gajeel and Levy, their limbs tangled in a dance she would likely never forget. He was so gentle and loving that every inch deeper was another inch she was more than happy to take.

When the discomfort started to subside, Levy raised her legs to rest her heels against his back. He noticed the change in position and took the initiative to rock his hips a little faster, the motion sending spirals of pleasure surging through Levy's entire body. She couldn't describe the sensations coursing through her skin, nor did she want to. It was unbelievable. Ineffable. She never wanted to label it as anything but that.

"Shit, Levy," he groaned against her mouth. "You really are small."

Levy kicked her heels against his back. "I am not!"

He buried his face against her neck in order to suppress his laughter. "I never said it was a bad thing, Shorty."

Levy laughed at that. "I hate you, Gajeel Redfox."

He took her skin between his teeth and sucked at her hot flesh, leaving his mark for everyone in the world to see. Levy grimaced at the uncomfortable sensation of being bitten, but revelled in the marvellous warmth of his lips and his tongue as they pressed against her.

"I love you too," he mocked in a gasp against her shoulder.

Levy covered her eyes with an arm and let the tears she'd been holding back finally spill onto her cheeks. Pleasure twisted its way through an overwhelming bliss she'd never experienced before. It was ethereal in a way that made her whole body feel as though it were floating.

Levy was finally at peace with herself. And her life.

 **[x-x-x]**

* * *

When Levy opened her eyes the next morning, Gajeel was curled up at the end of the bed, a mess of dark hair falling over his face. She rolled across the mattress towards him, where she quietly slipped under his arm. He stirred just a moment later.

"Mornin', Levy," he mumbled, curling a strand of her hair around his fingertip.

"Are you staying for breakfast?" she asked, silently wishing he'd stay for good but not ready to push the issue.

"I have to meet Makarov before I head into the Station," he explained, still half-asleep as he pressed his hand against her back and forced her tight against him. "Don't you have work?"

"I'm going to help Mirajane at the book store today," she explained.

"Why don't we grab breakfast on the way?" he grumbled, not entirely pleased with his own idea of getting out of bed. She'd known him as a morning person for the longest time. Maybe she'd been wrong, just like she'd been wrong about other things.

"That sounds good," she mumbled against his chest, suddenly pleased with herself for bathing - albeit sulkily - the night before. She could lay with him a little longer instead of racing around her apartment to get ready. Their first morning together as an established couple.

After a moment of revelling in his warmth, Levy let out a long sigh and reluctantly wriggled out of his embrace. She was about to sit upright when he caught her arm and pulled her back down to his level.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Getting ready for work," she said, as though the answer should've been obvious from the very beginning.

"We have time," he said, pulling her down on top of him.

Levy's face heated. "Gajeel Redfox, you should know better."

"I'm not hearing a no," he teased, sliding a hand over the back of her neck to pull her face closer.

Levy slid a hand over his mouth and turned to look at the bathroom door. "Not until you brush your teeth, Redfox."

Gajeel raised a brow. " _Really_?"

Levy nodded that she was serious.

"You're an insufferable woman, McGarden."

Levy grinned at that. "Isn't that why you love me?"

* * *

 _Next chapter will follow a holiday theme with the exchange of gifts and, of course, some more fluffy relationship growth. Look forward to that. We're nearing the end of the fic guys. I'm so, so grateful for all the time you've spent with me. I'm still learning to develop stories and to tell them in a more compelling way, so thank you for being a part of the process with me._


	15. Fairy Tail

**A/N: we're so close to the final chapter now. I'm so excited and sad to be bringing this story to an end! However - when July's NaNoWriMo event is over - I'll be working on my newest Gajevy fic _Compliments To The Chef._ I'll post the synopsis of the fic at the end of this chapter. You can also find details on my fanfiction account. :)**

* * *

 **Chapter Fifteen: Fairy Tail**

* * *

 _You set fire to ashes.  
_ _You fought through the darkness  
and brought me back to life,  
you brought me back to life.  
So even if I lose it all,  
I got so much left to give,  
I won't give up, no, no.  
My heart's on the front line,  
I'm not afraid._

* * *

"It really bothers you, doesn't it?"

Gajeel turned from the reflection of his tattoo in the mirror to glance over his shoulder at Levy. He could still see the edge of the dark frame hanging on the wall in the corner of his eye. She sat on his king-sized bed, wrapped up in a cocoon of blue sheets. The mere sight of her sitting there was enough to make him smile. He couldn't recall the first time he'd looked at her and known, with all his heart, that he wanted to stay by her side. It was just an instinct now.

Levy burned in his bloodstream.

She'd once told Gajeel that he was her favourite story. He'd told her that he never intended to let her read all of his pages, so she'd end the book sorely disappointed. If only he'd known then what he knew now. If only he'd known to arm himself against her secret charms and quick-witted personality. He scoffed at his past self. He'd rewritten the end of that story a thousand times in his head. It always ended the same. She was there, smiling. And she was his.

There wasn't a question that went unanswered. Not a taunt that went without retaliation. He'd laid his pages bare to her.

"Not particularly," he confessed. "The tattoo isn't the problem."

Levy considered his words before tossing the blankets aside and leaping off the bed. She strode through the room as though she'd lived there all her life. She looked so small and filled with childlike wonder that only seemed emphasised by the print of colourful stars on her shorts.

"You have the day off, right?" she asked, watching at a distance while he finished getting dressed.

"Just today and tomorrow, for the holidays," he commented.

"I have an idea." He could see the anticipation building as she bounced a few times on the balls of her feet. "A great idea, in fact."

Gajeel stared at her incredulously. Levy's ideas gave him every reason to be sceptical. They were never great, nor were they ever helpful. But she meant well, so he'd entertain her once again, even if it cost him a limb or two.

Her last great idea was birthed when he'd first introduced her to his new apartment. Noting the difference in size and the multiple rooms, Levy had insisted - no, demanded - that they put up a tree. She'd implored that her apartment was much too small for a tree and that she wasn't feeling at all festive in the disappointing throes of adult life. Of course, upon agreeing, the tree then had to be perfect. And there had to be lights - so many lights. And then there were the trimmings, and, well, by the end of the day the apartment looked more like the inside of a shopping arcade than a place to live.

He didn't mind the decorations so much anymore. During the nights he spent alone, Gajeel felt as though she still watched over him through the blinking lights hanging around his living room. He'd managed to spare the kitchen, at least, warning her that the decorations would be hazardous.

"Don't tell me, there's a new candle that smells like log fires and gingerbread and you absolutely _must_ add it to the pile in my bathroom cabinet."

Levy inflated her cheeks and pressed a finger to his chest. " _No_ , though that sounds incredible. This idea is something I think you'll like. Besides, we should make the most of our time together before work starts up again. And the lights hanging up in Magnolia are so pretty when the sun starts to set."

"I thought we were going to stay in bed all day and exchange gifts when the clock strikes midnight?" Honestly, Gajeel was just terrified of losing her in the growing inches of snow waiting outside his apartment.

"Then why are you getting dressed?" she asked, raising a brow as he glanced at himself in the mirror. Even his shirt seemed to mock him, all wrinkled in the centre like a smile made to scorn him.

"Fine," he acquiesced. "You'd better hurry up and get dressed, then, or we'll never make it."

Levy followed his gaze to the bed and offered him a grin that nearly blew the strength from his knees. "Too bad you already put your clothes on, huh?"

Stealing her hand in his own, Gajeel pulled her towards him and bent to lower his face close to hers. "That's all right. They're just as easy to take off as they were to put on."

* * *

"Your hands are freezing," he commented, squeezing his fingers around hers as she pulled him through Magnolia's shopping district.

Parents tugged their screaming children away from neighbouring shop windows as the wind-borne snow buffeted the otherwise empty street. Gajeel had always hated this time of year - hated the screams of children and the anticipation that the holidays were supposed to bring. He'd never been able to spend the holidays with his father, so he'd never bothered to celebrate at all.

He'd never even given old lady Belno a gift, after everything she'd done for him.

"I wonder what she'd have wanted..." he mumbled, caught off-guard when he realised he'd said the words aloud, and more-so when he found Levy staring at him, waiting for an explanation. "Uh, ya know, I never bought anyone a gift for the holidays. I just wondered what sort of thing Belno would've liked."

Levy seemed saddened by his explanation, but something in his words had touched a deeper spot inside of her. She appeared almost excited by the fact. Whatever he'd said, it no doubt had something to do with her _great_ idea.

"She'd have liked anything you gave her, Gajeel, because it came from you," Levy told him, swinging their arms between them as she gripped his hand tighter for warmth.

"You should wear your gloves," he told her, unable to miss how pale her skin had gotten or how flushed her cheeks looked in the bite of the afternoon wind.

"But then I can't feel your hand," she said, and in such a simple tone he almost felt stupid for suggesting it.

"Is that how you really feel?" he asked, returning to their former topic.

"Of course. A little cold never-"

"No, not that."

She caught onto his meaning before he could find the words to explain. "Gajeel, you could give me a dustpan of trash from your apartment and I'd probably frame it because it came from you." She paused to consider what she'd said before adding, "But please don't give me a dustpan of trash. My apartment is difficult enough to clean as it is."

Gajeel snorted a laugh. "It'd only end up at my place, anyway."

She rolled her eyes at that. "You don't want me to spend time in your apartment, then?"

Gajeel pulled her closer to his side. "I didn't say that, Shrimp."

"Shrimp, really? We were doing so well."

"Well, you're still a tiny little-"

"Here we are!" she interrupted, pulling Gajeel to a stop outside a small, narrow building with no windows at the front. It looked almost to have been squashed between the two larger, neighbouring stores.

"What is it?" he asked, a little unsettled by the way she familiarly pushed the door open and approached the staircase leading down into the building. There's no way Levy McGarden would spend time in a rundown place like this.

Right?

"You'll see, you'll see," she sang, pulling Gajeel down the steps towards an even narrower door. "He must've brought the sign inside when the snow picked up. Lucky for me."

When she nudged open the second door, Levy poked her head inside and asked, ever so quietly, if a man named Reedus was working today. She seemed to receive the answer she wanted, because a few moments later she was dragging Gajeel into a small waiting room and forcing him to sit beside a young woman with a sleeve of floral tattoos on her arm. The gloomy expression on her face was a stark contrast to Levy's, who seemed only eager to be sitting in the small room.

Having released his hand, Levy threw off her coat, relieved to be in a warm room, and sank back into the chair to his right. It wasn't until he removed his coat that Gajeel realised where they were. She wasn't pale because she was cold - she was pale because she'd never gotten a tattoo before and they were now sitting in a tattoo parlour.

She was terrified.

The curtain at the opposite end of the room fluttered against the wind they'd brought in with their entrance, exposing a young man sitting in a seat in the centre of the room. The familiar sound of buzzing and chatter filled his ears all at once.

"Wait, what're we doin' here, Levy?" he asked, leaning over the arm of the chair as to keep their conversation private in the otherwise cramped room. "You can't be serious."

"Trust me."

"You're shaking," he noticed, squeezing her thigh when her foot wouldn't stop tap, tap, tapping on the floor. "Besides, you can't just waltz in here like this. Most places require appointments."

"Reedus is an old friend. He'll make time for us, even if we have to wait," she promised, though the certainty of getting in seemed to turn her stomach rather than settle it.

"What kind of point are you trying to prove? You think getting a tattoo will lessen the burden on me? I already told you, it's not the tattoo."

"I'm not the only one getting a tattoo today," she commented. "You are, too."

Gajeel stared at her with yet another look of incredulity. "Oh yeah?"

"Yes," she said. "And I know exactly what you're going to have."

Gajeel's eyes narrowed. "So, I don't get to choose?"

Levy shook her head.

"Fine. But only if you get in the seat first. I'm not havin' you run out on me after setting this whole thing up."

Levy's smile widened, but her eyes reflected a moment of fear. "I'll go first, but you can't look."

"I'm not sure I want to," he laughed. "Levy, are you sure you don't just want to get a piercing or something? I'm all for your rebellious stage but this ain't how I pictured it."

He'd much rather she took to rebelling in his bed, but that was another topic for another time.

"No," she insisted. "Piercings come out. A tattoo is forever. Please, Gajeel, just trust me on this."

He leaned back in his seat and cast his mind to Phantom Lord's crest on his shoulder. She was right.

Tattoos - and their meanings - really did last forever.

* * *

Levy had all but crushed every bone in his hand while laying on the bench Gajeel presently occupied. For a minute there, he'd thought he might lose his hand before the tattoo was complete. He'd been more than relieved to see her finished and back on her feet.

She did well, all things considered, but the process did nothing for her drained complexion. She watched him from a second seat in the room, staring intently as her friend Reedus followed instructions to cover Gajeel's old crest. She'd been insistent that the new tattoo would cover it nicely.

The mere thought of erasing Phantom Lord's symbol was astonishing. Back then, when he'd been in the thick of it, anyone who dared to cover the tattoo was punished and ridiculed. He'd thought he would never be free of those demons - but maybe Levy was right. Maybe the problems started with the tattoo, with the reminder of his past. He would always have those memories, but he didn't need to wear his scars forever.

"Do you need me to hold your hand?" she asked from her seat.

Gajeel rolled his eyes. "So you can break it again?"

Levy's cheeks flushed at the comment, bringing her entire face to life. She glanced away from him and shuffled forward in her seat, not wanting to press her back against the chair. She'd chosen her left shoulder blade to sport their new matching tattoos. The design hadn't taken all that long to finish, but Gajeel had been instructed to stay at her front the entire time.

Reedus had copied the design from a message on Levy's phone and hidden it out of sight while he worked. If he didn't know any better, he'd think the two of them had been in cahoots for months.

"I didn't think it would itch so much," she complained, propping her chin in her hands as she balanced her elbows on her thighs. "How long until it stops itching?"

Reedus laughed at that. "It could be a few days. It varies person to person. I recommend removing the bandage after a minimum of four hours; you can wash it then. If you take good care of it, the skin will be better in no time."

"Some people take it off earlier, but they suggest four to six hours if plastic hasn't been applied," Gajeel added, surprised by the look of awe on each of their faces. "What? You know how many of these things I sat through? All of our members had one."

Levy laughed at that. "Reedus also paints, you know. I mean, on big canvases. He's so talented."

Gajeel could almost feel Reedus blushing at the compliment. "You flatter me, Levy."

"I still remember the painting of Lucy. It was so beautiful. She still has it, you know. I see it on the wall of her bedroom when she sends me selfies."

Gajeel stifled a laugh. "What does she see in your apartment, I wonder?"

"Nothing, because most of my things are at your place," she remarked, shooting him down before he could endeavour to make the comment himself.

Her quick-fire responses were part of the reason he loved her. He shouldn't have expected anything less, really.

"How long have you two been together, if you don't mind my asking?" Reedus asked.

Gajeel flinched at the question.

Levy dropped her hands into her lap and sat up straight in her seat. "Well..."

They didn't have an answer.

"It doesn't matter," Gajeel said quickly. "We don't need to count the days. That's for married people, anyway."

Levy's face was tinted red. "I-I suppose it is."

"So we'll start countin' when we're married."

Both Levy and Reedus seemed to pause in time as they looked at each other. Gajeel couldn't quite figure out what he'd said, but knew he'd sparked something bigger than he'd intended.

"So, you intend to marry my friend?" he asked.

Gajeel's heart was suddenly in his throat. Were all artists this nosy? He looked at Levy, who still seemed trapped in an anomaly of time that left her mouth open and her eyes wide. He knew she could see him, though. Her pupils always dilated when their eyes locked.

"Yeah, actually," Gajeel said. "I do."

Levy's mouth closed after an achingly long period of silence. She looked past him to Reedus, who said nothing when their eyes met.

"I didn't start this with the intention of finishing it," Gajeel went on. "O' course, if you say you don't want me, I'm gone. And, in any case, I'm stuck with her now that we have these damn tattoos."

Levy's eyes filled with tears. "I'm so mad that I can't hug you right now."

Gajeel grinned at that. "For now, let's just focus on today. Isn't that what you're always tellin' me to do? Focus on the now."

"The past doesn't define the present, it gives us experience to learn from," Levy said, recalling their many late-night conversations. "Right now, I'm in this forever."

Gajeel felt the familiar ache of wanting to take her face in his hands and kiss her. He'd felt it many times before - each time more painful than the last - but this was by far the worst.

"Then forever is what we'll be."

* * *

"It's freezing!" Levy complained. "And my back itches so much!"

"Your shoulder blade," Gajeel corrected. "An' you're the one who insisted on staying out until the lights came on."

"Shut up," she said, barely stifling her laughter as she dumped her coat and bag on the floor by the couch. "It was worth it, right? Besides, now we can take off our bandages."

Gajeel had almost forgotten about the tattoo on his left shoulder. Levy, on the other hand, was eager to begin show and tell. He wasn't sure why he'd cast his gaze to the floor when she started peeling off her shirt, but Gajeel couldn't seem to face her back after deciding to do so.

The sound of her squealing and the sudden flash of light indicated the inevitable - she'd turned on all those damned twinkly lights while the carpet occupied his gaze. He glanced up to find her standing in front of the tree, arms stretched up high towards the star sitting at the very top. She'd spent hours figuring out how to thread the lights into it so that it could glow like everything else in the room.

He'd never seen a more magnificent sight than her standing there in the glow of artificial lighting. An Angel come to forgive his sins. His Ghost of Christmas Present and Future, come to erase the phantoms of his past.

"I love you," he said, suddenly. The emotion felt like gravel in his mouth, but he'd never forget to say those words when he felt such a swell of affection rise within him. No matter how much it hurt. He'd made the mistake of keeping his feelings bottled up. He never wanted to miss the chance to tell her how he felt.

"Hey, come here and take off my bandage," she said, nudging one of the presents under the tree with her feet.

"Ya know, electricity is going to cost me a fortune this month," he admonished, taking the time to admire the curve of her spine and the shape of her hips as he approached her from behind.

"No it won't," she teased. "It's just once a year. The lights are worth it, right?"

"It's better to soak the bandage in water first," he told her, avoiding her comment about the lights.

"Then go get some," she said, refusing to move from the glow of flashing lights.

Gajeel muttered to himself as he wandered into the kitchen and scavenged for a bowl of warm water and an assortment of anti-bacterial soaps to wash the tattoo with. The cloth swished back and forth as he carried the bowl and the bottles back to the living room.

He had to wonder what sort of symbol was waiting underneath the bandaging. Even while sitting on the bench, Gajeel couldn't figure out the shape of it. Hard as he tried, and as much as he hated to admit it, he'd been left completely in the dark.

Levy stood perfectly still as he proceeded to soak the bandage. Even when water trickled down her spine - a sensation known to make her giggle relentlessly - Levy didn't move a muscle.

Only when he started to peel it off did she begin to speak. "Do you know why Lucy called her novel _Fairy Tail_?" she asked.

"No," he said, flatly. He'd never ventured to ask.

"The guild in her book, Fairy Tail, was created to give people homes. All of their members had terrible pasts, demons they wanted to avoid. They'd lost all hope." He could feel her back trembling as she paused to take a breath. "Fairies are mythical creatures. Nobody really knows if they exist or not, but it's the maybe that keeps the wonder alive."

Gajeel wanted to make a remark about her size and Levy potentially being a fairy, but remained silent for fear of ruining her mood.

"Do fairies have tails or don't they? As long as the question lingers, the members have a reason to go on believing. They can adventure out into the world in search of those answers, together. If a person can believe in something they can't see, they can believe in something as abstract as hope. Fairy Tail is their home. Their family."

The bandage flopped to the ground, leaving a "Levy" palm-sized mark in its place on her shoulder blade. It looked almost like a pink bird with an arrowhead for a tail.

"You're my home, Gajeel. You're my Fairy Tail. That's why, no matter what, I want you to know that I'll always believe in you. Even when nobody else does."

Gajeel was so touched that he could barely concentrate on cleaning her reddened skin. While his hand moved in small motions, so too did his mind begin to wander and wonder. Everything she'd said hit him so deep in his heart that he thought he might cry - but the tears wouldn't come and his mouth just wouldn't open.

"I think," she went on, "that you belong in a place like Fairy Tail. That it was always your rightful place. Phantom Lord is the past, but Fairy Tail is your present. A place where we can be safe and happy...and together."

"Levy," Gajeel placed a hand on her shoulder and turned her around to face him. She was crying, tears trickling down her hot cheeks. " _You_ are my Fairy Tail. Wherever you go, I'll go. No guild, no building, can define who we are. I'd chase hope in your shadow any day."

Before he was tempted to kiss her, Gajeel stepped past his trembling lover to reach for the pile of gifts under the tree. He picked up a small, narrow box wrapped clumsily in floral paper and held it out for her to take. It was easy to differentiate hers from his by the neat packaging and bows. But he knew she wouldn't care about his terrible wrapping skills.

It was the inside that mattered.

"It isn't midnight yet," she said. "And we have to take the bandage off your shoulder."

"That didn't stop you from giving me a gift, did it?" he reminded her, gesturing with his eyes to the bandage on the floor. "Fairy Tail can wait."

Levy wiped the tears from her cheeks. "I guess you're right."

He watched her tear at the paper, letting anticipation get the better of him while rocking back on his heels. She peeled back the lid to find a small key wedged inside a deep-set cushion and stared up at him in confusion. Her eyes brimmed with more tears as the possibilities ran through her trembling fingertips and up into her mind.

"Gajeel... I don't understand."

Gajeel shook his head. "It's yours."

"I-I know that, I just-"

"It's a key to our apartment."

"Our apartment?" Levy's eyes widened as she clutched the box closer to her stomach. "What are you talking about?"

"You already moved half your junk in here, you might as well bring the rest."

"Gajeel!" the box fell out of her hands when she lifted them to cover her mouth.

"You think I'd let you hang all these lights in here if you weren't going to contribute to the bills?"

She crashed into him with the kind of force that nearly drove the wind from his lungs, but he caught her with ease - and with the kind of caution that kept his hands well away from her brand new tattoo. She clutched onto his shirt like a woman possessed, moulding her body so tightly against his he thought he might merge right through her.

Kissing the top of her head, Gajeel leaned down to then kiss the tears from her cheeks. She was trembling so violently in his arms that he had to consider whether she was truly happy or traumatised by the offer.

Lily jumped out from behind the couch to nuzzle against Levy's leg, no doubt concerned by the abrupt onslaught of tears. Gajeel had to stop himself from smiling any wider, lest his mouth ache more than his freshly tattooed shoulder.

"I'm sorry," she gasped. "I can't seem to stop crying."

Gajeel placed a soft kiss on her neck. "Welcome to Fairy Tail, Levy."

She sobbed uncontrollably in his arms. "I'm home."

* * *

 _I'm adding the story to my Wattpad **xensorcell** for those of you interested! Feel free to keep an eye on my profile as I start transferring chapters across. _

_Also, I'll be going on a small hiatus in July so that I can work on my novel for Camp NaNoWriMo. I hope to get the two final chapters posted for you all when I return. Once again, thank you for your readership! :)_

 _Just a quick fyi; I made Levy's guild mark pink. I know it's white in the anime but I like the thought of a pretty pink guild mark, like the one Lucy has (since Lucy obviously doesn't have one in this fic and the protagonist is where she got her inspiration from!)._

 **Compliments To The Chef (summary subject to change as I finish plotting the drafts):** For runaway Levy McGarden, the phrase _"if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen"_ is about to become a reality when aspiring chef Gajeel Redfox invites her to start working in his restaurant.


	16. Phantoms

**A/N: Thank you so much for being so patient with this update. I really needed a break from writing fanfiction to catch up with school work and real life. I've been going through a lot and just didn't feel right finishing this fic if my heart wasn't in it. On that note, please enjoy the last two chapters of No Peeking! Some of you may have noticed that I've been rewriting the previous chapters, too. Haha. Anamnesis has been taken down for the moment, but I hope to put it back up with new stories at a later date. :)**

* * *

 **Chapter Sixteen: Phantoms**

* * *

 _ _No more shame, those embers they just burn to dust.  
Turning pages, bruises fade, and I made it through the deep.  
I earned by stripes from battle cries, this skin is thick.__

* * *

With her cellphone tucked between her ear and shoulder, Levy pushed her way into the room. Blue hair bounced atop her head in a messy bun as she bent to drop a stack of books and a mug of coffee onto the living room table. Gajeel couldn't help but notice the high-heeled shoes dangling from the tips of her fingers, which she eventually set down beside the couch where he sat. She'd gotten used to wearing them recently. Once or twice he'd found himself temporarily confused by her growth spurt.

She didn't look at him as she went about her routine, wandering aimlessly back and forth while talking happily on the phone. He thought the professional look suited her well - and not just because the skirt she wore accentuated her flawless hips. No, Levy was in her prime whenever she had some work to do. She was at peace with herself, and Gajeel found confident Levy sexy as all hell.

She wandered in and out of the kitchen for a moment, occasionally laughing into the phone as she tossed one item of clothing after the other onto the floor. When she'd stripped down to her underwear, Levy then wandered into the adjoining bedroom and didn't emerge until she'd found herself a pair of pyjamas to wear. Gajeel was a little disappointed, but he thought the floral print shorts suited her all the same - and he'd never get tired of looking at those legs, regardless of the clothes she wore.

Locating the boot-styled slippers he'd bought her during the holidays, Levy slipped them on with the aid of her free hand before collapsing onto the couch beside him. Gajeel's eyes flit back to the television at the front of the room, which had been playing to itself since she'd entered the room. He wasn't sure when his program had ended, but he wagered it was somewhere between Levy bending over to dump her things on the table and stripping out of her work clothes.

Lowering the phone to her chest, Levy leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek. "Nysa says hello."

"Nysa can't talk," Gajeel reminded her.

"Lucy sounds exhausted," she whispered with a hand over her phone.

Gajeel listened to them talk a while longer before the ache in his chest began to swell. Frustrated, he snatched the phone from Levy's hand and interrupted their nonsensical banter.

"Blondie, you can have my woman when she's finished greeting me," he said.

 _"She was mine first."_

Gajeel laughed at that. "Ya think I can borrow her for a bit, then? Don't you have a kid to feed?" Gajeel winced at the sound of screaming pouring out of the speaker. "I'll take that as a yes."

 _"Nysa's awake; I'd better go. Consider yourself lucky, Redfox."_

Gajeel smiled inwardly. He felt a pang of sympathy for the new mother, but the glee of having Levy to himself made that feeling dissipate as fast as it came.

"Take care, Lucy," Levy said beside him.

Lucy's laughter faded until Gajeel disconnected the call.

"This is the first time in forever that we've been home at the same time, huh?" she noticed, nestling up to his side on the couch. "Ever since I moved in here it's like we're not even in the same house."

Gajeel laughed at that. Both of their shifts had been pretty sporadic since Levy's stay in his apartment became a permanent one. Even when she wasn't in her office, Levy was up late reading manuscripts and writing notes. She'd taken a number of courses over the past few months, many of which resulted in more work and potential lack of sleep.

He gazed at the tattoo on her back, faded to a near white when the healing was over. He still remembered that day clear in his mind. The way her words had spilled out like stardust come to grant his wishes. She'd given him a home in her heart. Gajeel intended to make this residence a permanent one.

"Welcome home," he said, still delighted by the taste of those words in his mouth.

"I'm home," she said with a grin so wide it almost appeared sinister.

Threading her fingers together against the back of his neck, Levy leaned in to brush her lips against his. It was the sort of kiss that made the hairs on his body stand on end, but not enough to summon his libido. At this point, though, Gajeel couldn't differentiate between love and lust. Levy was the source of all good feeling. He didn't see a reason to separate them anymore.

"Say," she started, kissing him again and again in that jubilant way she often did, "when were you planning to tell me that you made the hole bigger on purpose?"

Gajeel's flesh erupted in goosebumps. Drawing back from her embrace, Gajeel studied her gaze for some time, trying to make sense of the words she'd strung together. "What?"

Levy's smile would make a river turn back on itself in fear. "The hole. You could've fixed it from the start."

Glancing away from her assertive brown eyes, Gajeel shuffled back on the couch and scratched the back of his head. "Er, you know what, I think the station might need me-" Levy climbed onto his lap, interrupting his train of thought entirely. Her eyes penetrated his in a way that made his soul shiver. If this were any other time, any other moment, Gajeel might've enjoyed the way she straddled him. Now, though, he just wanted to disappear. "Who told you about the hole?"

Levy settled both hands upon his shoulders. "It's amazing what you can get out of Freed when he's hyped up on coffee after a long night of reading. Plus, with Laxus back in the office, he's more than eager to stay behind and chat."

 _Freed_. He should've known. Everyone in that damned building knew about Gajeel's ability to fix just about everything. He was a tinkerer at heart, much like his father.

"You know, I thought something was fishy when I found out about you fixing the elevator in the building. I thought to myself: Wow, what a useful guy he is. And then, when I started living here, you started fixing other things: The sink, the overhead cabinets, my fairy lights, so again I thought: Hey, I wonder why such a little hole gave him _so much trouble_."

Gajeel's forehead beaded with sweat. "Levy, it's not how it sounds. I really was tryin' to-"

"I know," she interjected. "I know you were trying to fix it. I know you had good intentions. I just wanted to see you sweat a bit as punishment for making me suffer that hole for so long."

Gajeel heaved a sigh of relief. "I owe that hole a lot, you know. Without it, you wouldn't have interacted with a guy like me."

"A guy like you?" She raised a brow at the reference. "Gajeel, there are no guys like you. You're the only Gajeel Redfox that I know."

Gajeel rolled his eyes. "You better remember that when other men start swarming you in that little skirt of yours."

"So, what made you decide to leave the hole alone? Was it my cute pyjamas? Or maybe it was the towel incident? Or did you just-"

Gajeel interrupted her rambling with a kiss. His mind shimmered back to the day they'd first met, to that moment in time when the world seemed to go up in flames. She'd made his need to feel invisible, to blend into a menial routine, became obsolete. All at once he'd wanted to torment her. He'd wanted to be near her and dreaded the sensation all at once. Being away from her made him suffocate when all he wanted to do was breathe her in. He'd asphyxiated himself; convinced himself that she was nothing. Just another empty page in his story. A blank face like all the rest.

"Your thighs, probably," he commented.

Levy let out a bubbling fit of laughter that rocked her forward until she couldn't contain it any longer. Burying her face against his shoulder, Levy cried with laughter until she couldn't breathe, her chest heaving in fits against his own. Gajeel trailed an aimless finger through her hair, tugging at loose strands until she came up for air once again. She looked at him now with eyes swollen in tears.

"I don't know why you're laughing," he complained. "Have you seen your thighs?"

Levy wiped a tear from her cheek. "I'm sorry. I just didn't expect such a basic answer."

It was only part truth, of course. Gajeel had been interested in Levy for a long time, but he didn't know he loved her until he'd kissed her for the very first time. And even then his feelings had been confused, a fog of distant murmurs telling him to go in different directions. In the end, he'd followed his heart.

"So, about this weekend, I was thinking of stopping in on Lucy to see the baby along the way."

Gajeel frowned. "You mean you want me to stand in the same room as that wailing meat-sack?"

Levy rolled her eyes. "You were a baby once, you know."

"Prove it. I see no photographic evidence."

Levy scanned the wall of photographs salvaged from his childhood home. There really weren't any frames of Gajeel as a baby. The earliest photos had been taken during his father's absence. At first he'd thought the lack of photos had been due to his father's negligence. As it turned out, Metalicana had taken Gajeel's photos to Alvarez during his visits. Those photos were probably lost in the ocean somewhere, like his father had been before his body miraculously washed ashore with two others. Gajeel tried to shake the awful sight of his father's corpse from his mind. Cremating him had been for the best.

Levy's cheeks flushed. "Are you going to be this way if we have a child?"

Gajeel shrugged. "Our children aren't going to cry all the time. They'll be tough, like their father."

Levy's face heated. "Our _children_?"

"We'll have a boy an' a girl," he told her. "A girl to take after her mother and a boy to beat the shit out of her enemies."

"She'll beat up her own enemies." Levy paused for a minute. "Wait, there'll be no beating of any kind. Our children will be well-behaved."

"You're right, we'll leave the beating to me."

Levy snatched a handful of Gajeel's shirt and gave it a tug. "You think you're a tough guy, huh?"

"I know it," he teased.

Levy was about to lean in for another kiss when her body jerked upright, as though yanked away from him by an invisible string. "My coffee!"

Gajeel sat in disappointed silence as she clambered off his lap to snatch her coffee mug from the table where she'd left it. She let out a whine that sounded almost identical to Nysa's wailing over the phone. Climbing out of his seat, Gajeel shuffled towards the kitchen without a word. At this point in time he'd gotten so used to brewing Levy's coffee that he'd considered opening a damn cafe.

"I love you~" she called after him, the sound echoing long after he'd closed the kitchen door.

* * *

The cemetery was as quiet and cosy as he remembered it. The rolling hillside was the perfect place to lay his family to rest, the perfect place to scatter his father's ashes. He watched the remains of his father's physical life flutter out into the horizon, gliding through the air on a shaft of undulating light.

Memories of his childhood came fluttering to the surface like phantoms come to haunt him, to steal the light from the sky and enclose him in darkness. They didn't get that chance. In the haze of those childhood glimmers he saw festering wounds begin to close. He remembered the innocent times - the day he learned to ride a bike, the time he baked cookies at Belno's side, the day Jose complimented him before the gang turned wicked. Phantom Lord had been a place for orphaned children to go. A place for them to grow and to flourish. Only as they got older did the group begin to descend into darkness. Gajeel did what he did out of spite, out of the need to be loved and wanted. The others had their reasons, too - but it was no excuse.

There was never an excuse for hurting others. Never justice in acts of oppression. He'd lost the light in his eyes and so he'd pushed and pushed until he snuffed out the light in others. He'd wanted everyone to suffer as he did, only to realise that everything he'd wanted had been right there all along, within arms reach. He'd had someone who wanted him. Who looked out for him. He'd had a father who missed him even when he was gone. He'd had a friend in Juvia, who spent every day of her life fighting to make him smile. He'd had Belno.

Levy's hand found his in the lingering pastoral quiet. They lost themselves to the sweep of hills, the scatter of sunbeams and the whisper of cold wind gliding up and out of the woodlands behind them.

"They did a great job with the stone, huh?" Levy said, kneeling to place an assortment of flowers on his father's headstone, which had been buried in the ground beside Belno's. "It looks almost metallic in this light."

Gajeel smiled to himself. It was an ode to his father's cold and steel-like personality, and a symbol of Black Steel's demise. His past had died with his father. His wrong-doings had been absolved by the angel come to take him - by Levy. This was the first time he'd brought Levy to visit his father's grave. The first few times he'd visited had been during his time with the academy. Sting and Rogue had accompanied him once. The visit had only been brief, but each of them had said their piece. They'd given Gajeel a means of venting when he missed Levy, when he wanted to return home and give up on everything. He owed them a debt he wasn't sure he could ever repay.

There were so many people out there willing to help him. How could he have been so blind to their kindness?

"Gajeel... I have a confession to make," came a meek voice layered with the tears shed onto his father's grave.

He didn't like the sound of that. "A confession?"

When she nodded to confirm it was so, Levy's hair tumbled over her shoulders and onto her chest. She turned to meet his gaze this time, her brown eyes shifting towards him like the dark side of the moon, big and round but temporarily out of reach. She looked distant.

Her silence made him ache. "Levy? Is everything all right?"

"The other day, when I missed dinner, I wasn't actually working late. In fact, Laxus let us leave early."

Gajeel wiped a bead of sweat from his brow. He didn't like where she was going with this. She'd already found somebody else - somebody better - somebody who deserved to feel her warm breath on their neck in a morning and enjoy the sensation of her small hands running along their skin. She'd already realised she was too good for him.

"I ran into Totomaru," she said, then, the guilt ripe in her voice. "We had a drink together."

Gajeel didn't know if he should smack something or stop looking into her empty gaze just long enough to breathe. "And?"

"He apologised to me," she said. "He told me to tell you that you've inspired a change in him. I didn't want to mention him right away. I thought you'd get angry, or that it would bring up a lot of painful things for you. Seeing you here, now, I thought you could handle it."

"Wait, you had a drink and he apologised to you?" Gajeel asked, his body sagging with the relief he felt after building up so much suspenseful weight. "That's it?"

"He said he wants to become a teacher."

Gajeel held back a laugh. Totomaru? A teacher? Last Gajeel heard he didn't even like kids. But, then, a lot of the Phantom Lord persona had been a facade. Gajeel had terrorised people he liked just to put on a good show for attention. He'd stolen from people he cared about and beaten "friends" bloody to garner attention and praise from Jose and the rest of his group. He supposed Totomaru was no different.

"Hell, if I can become a cop then I'm sure Totomaru will accomplish his goals."

Levy's smile shone light in her once empty eyes. "Your outlook on life really has softened. You're gentler when you approach hard decisions. Even today, when we left Lily with Wendy, you wanted to make sure she wouldn't be burdened with him staying there for the night. And you waited until he was asleep to say goodbye."

Gajeel felt a flush of embarrassment tingle along the bumps in his spine. "Yeah, well, he's family, ya know?" A hand made its way into the left pocket of his jeans, where it sat comfortably against a small object lodged deep down out of sight. "I'm done abandoning my family."

Levy wiped a tear from her cheek. "I'm so proud of you."

"Hey, do you mind if I have a minute alone with these two old geezers?" he asked, gesturing with a sweep of his gaze to the gravestones lying at their feet. "I only need a minute."

"Take all the time you need. I'll be here if you need me," she said, walking her way past the gravestones towards the brow of the hill. He thought the sunlight looked especially pale in the light of her warm back as it marched up the hillside. She really had melted the steel in his bones and the iron wrapped around his heart. He was starting to hate himself a little bit - hate the emotional sap he'd become. But he wouldn't have it any other way.

Crouching to sit on the balls of his feet, Gajeel pulled a small black box from the confinements of his pocket. Laying it on Belno's gravestone, he let out a long, exasperated breath. "I wish you were here to help me with this, you old hag. You had the best advice an' I never cared to listen. This is my punishment, huh?"

Gajeel lingered in the quiet for a moment, half-expecting Belno to give an answer. "The truth is, I don't know a lot about relationships. I don't know when things are supposed to be done, or how I'm supposed to do 'em. I never knew my mother, or I suppose I'd ask her." Gajeel laughed at the thought of having another relative to disappoint. "Anyway, the point is, that woman over there with the attitude larger than her size ought to carry, I don't wanna lose her."

Sliding the box towards his father's newly placed grave, Gajeel turned towards the inscription on the stone. "Well, _beloved father_ ," he read, "I'm in quite a bind. I'm lucky I'm not a woman, I guess, so I don't have t'worry about who'll be giving me away. But I'd like some fatherly advice all the same, if you can spare it. If there was ever a time to want you here, it'd be now, when I'm at the brink of happiness." Letting out a long sigh, Gajeel glanced between the two graves and opened the box to reveal a small ring with a sapphire stone in the centre, chosen specifically because it reminded him of Levy's hair. "I don't want that happiness to go away."

As he sat there in the quiet once more, Gajeel thought he felt the familiar embrace of Belno's arms cradling his back in the hot flush of sunlight sweeping over the hillside. His father's hand squeezed his arm in that manly-but-affectionate gesture of his. His body trembled in the hot embrace of sunlight.

"So, hey, this is me extendin' an early invitation to this shindig. If she says yes, I'll leave two seats empty just for you. You'd better not let me down, ya hear me? Two years from now, when Levy's birthday rolls around, I'm going to make her mine. You understand?"

Shadows rippled across the gravestones as if in answer to his question. The doubt in his voice, in his thoughts, had diminished. He knew without a doubt that he wanted her to say yes - and that she would. Because even if he didn't believe it, even if he couldn't accept it, right now, in this moment, Levy McGarden was his. She loved him.

Somebody in this big, bad world wanted to be by his side.

"We should go check on Wendy," Gajeel called into the distance, stuffing the box back into his pocket.

Levy waved to him under the slice of sunlight bleeding through her hair. "And then you'll take me on a date, right?"

Gajeel snorted. "As long as that date involves food. I'm starving."

Rising to his full height, Gajeel watched the love of his life skip down the hillside towards him, the momentum guiding her into his waiting arms. Mussing her hair, Gajeel cast a quick look at her feet. The sneakers she wore suited her pretty well. They ought to, since they matched the ones on his feet.

"How are your feet?" he asked.

She raised her toes under the weight of her shoes and slipped an arm around his waist. "I should've worn my heels."

Gajeel shoved her with his hip. "Don't you dare. I ain't carrying you again."

She screwed up her face in disappointment. "But..."

"No," he said. "Yer a big girl; you can walk."

He did end up carrying her, though. And he carried her the same way on their wedding day, past the two empty seats at the front of the cathedral, past the faces of friends and coworkers, past the abandoned shackles of hollow memories and out the door into the forgiving hum of sunlight and the clear sky of another day.

There is always a sliver of hope waiting to be found in the darkness, just as there will always be a star to guide you home. For Gajeel Redfox, home was wherever his heart went. And his heart now belonged to her.

Forever.

* * *

 _More than anything, I wanted this chapter to have a feeling of finality to it, and of growth. I wanted it to be lighthearted and warm, and to send a message to you, as my readers: That hope can be found in the darkest of places. If Gajeel can do it, so can you. Don't close yourselves off to love, especially when the person trying to love you is yourself. Everyone deserves to be forgiven._

 _And with that, I urge you onto the epilogue. Another slice of happiness set in the future, a bonus gift for all of your support and love. You have all given me a reason to keep on pressing forward, even in my darkest times. Though you may not have realised I was suffering on the other side of the screen, know that your presence has been warm and loving, and that it has made my life more meaningful._

 _I hope those of you that move on to read Compliments To The Chef, which will be posted in the near future, enjoy doing so. :)_


	17. Epilogue

__Gave me strength when I had none at all.  
Gave me hope when I was running low.  
Showed me how to make it through  
and for everything you know I thank you.  
You believed when I'd no reason to.  
You were there when I needed you.  
And I just wanna thank you.  
I just wanna thank you.__

* * *

Ten years after becoming Mrs. Redfox, Levy stayed true to her vows and the promise to bestow happiness upon her husband. And now, they had a family to share that happiness with - a son, Daichi, whose sixth birthday was being celebrated in their brand new home. An assortment of boxes still littered the kitchen, but the Redfox family were doing their best to make it feel like home.

"The garden is huge," Lucy cooed, watching her eldest, Nysa, enjoying Gajeel's newly built swing-set through the kitchen window. Whatever Natsu was doing out there with Nysa, it made Lucy smile in a way that made Levy's heart flutter. At twelve years old, Nysa had developed a sort of male-orientated bond with his father. The two of them spent a lot of time together, which left Lucy plenty of opportunities for one-on-one time with her daughter - who, apparently, didn't sit still long enough to enjoy the solace of her mother.

"You're not going to join your brother on the swings, Fay?" Levy asked.

Fay glanced up just long enough to jump up off the ground and take a seat at the kitchen table. With only two years between them, Lucy had tried everything to coax the two siblings together. She wanted the family to be a loving one. Levy didn't see a problem really. Though they both had their spats, Nysa and Fay were good kids - and they both loved each other very much.

"I can't believe how much he looks like you," Levy said from where she sat frosting Daichi's birthday cake. "That blonde hair is the spitting image of yours."

"Fay looks more like her father," Lucy said, glancing between the window and her daughter, who now sat scribbling on a sheet of paper.

"She has your eyes, though," Levy noted.

Fay glanced up from her drawing to pull at a strand of pink hair. She didn't enjoy being the centre of conversation, even if she did like to pose for family photographs. Levy thought that, in the end, it would be Fay who mirrored Lucy's personality the most.

"How are you feeling, Levy?" Wendy asked from the entrance behind her. "Is it okay to be throwing a birthday party when you're...you know...so far along?"

Levy rubbed a hand over her swollen stomach. "The twins will let their big brother have his birthday party, I'm sure," she said. "Are Juvia and Gray all right watching the kids?"

Wendy offered Levy a warm smile as she approached the table. "Daichi and Amaya are playing with his new toys. Last I saw of Juvia, she was sound asleep on her husband's arm."

Levy laughed at that. "Gajeel will take over as soon as he gets home."

"It sucks that he had to work today," Lucy commented, turning back from the window to get a good look at the cake on the kitchen table. "If he doesn't hurry up then he'll miss the singing."

"I'm sure Daichi's too occupied for singing at the moment," Levy insisted. Juvia's daughter, Amaya, was a year younger than Daichi, so he often took it upon himself to try and teach her the things he knew. They spent a great deal of time together. Levy hoped that the two of them could be good friends growing up, as Juvia and Gajeel were.

The three girls glanced back at the doorway when it clicked open a second time. Gajeel sauntered into the room, clad in his uniform, with a series of bags hanging from his arms. He dumped them on the kitchen counter beside Lucy before turning towards his heavily pregnant wife. She met him with a quiet warmth in her eyes, the kind of warmth that always reeled him in.

"I brought everything from savoury snacks to chocolate," he said. "If our son doesn't gain at least ten pounds today then he ain't celebratin' right."

Levy rolled her eyes. "Try to go easy with the sweets, Gajeel. Just a little bit."

"If a kid can't comatose on sugar on his birthday, when can he?" he chortled.

Levy slouched back in her seat to assess the many faces surrounding her. Out of all of them, Gajeel looked the most different. His hair had been cut shorter - to signify his growth, he'd said. Levy figured it had more to do with his job than anything, but she marvelled at the sight of him all the same. He also wore less of his piercings now, though his face remained consistently hardened to any expression. He only seemed to convey his emotions to his wife and son. It was something he'd tried to shake the habit of doing, but he still found it difficult to open himself up to everyone. He was trying, though. That's what mattered.

"Sting and Rogue said they'd drop by later with a gift," he said suddenly, as though the memory had surfaced somewhere in her eyes. "Are Gray an' Juvia here already?"

Levy nodded that it was so. "They're in the living room. Sources tell me that our son has worn down his aunt again. Juvia is sound asleep."

"That means Fullbuster has been left defenceless." Gajeel's smile was wicked. "I hope our son gives him a good beating."

" _Gajeel_ ," Levy scolded.

"So, when're you plannin' on shacking up and-" Gajeel didn't even get to finish the question before Wendy met him with a smack to the face.

"I-I'm sorry," Wendy gasped. "I don't know what came over me."

Gajeel glowered over her with fiery red eyes. "You're gettin' too sassy for yer own good. Don't think because you grew a foot or two that you can take me on, Marvell."

Wendy poked out her tongue. "I could beat you any day."

"She spends a lot of time with Chelia," came a tired voice from the living room entrance to Levy's left. "Those two are inseparable. It seems Chelia's attitude is beginning to rub off on Wendy. They're good kids, though."

Levy didn't think _kids_ was an accurate choice of words at this point in time. Wendy was already a good seven inches taller than Levy. "How are you feeling, Juvia?"

"Tired," she said, as though they didn't already know she'd been snoozing on Gray's arm for the past thirty minutes or so. "Daichi challenged Gray to a game. Juvia escaped before things got out of hand."

"I'd better go check on him," Gajeel said, shuffling through the kitchen to leave the women on their own.

Levy rubbed her stomach again, sensing the twin's urgency to be with their brother. They weren't due for a good two weeks, but Levy thought they might have other plans. It was an inkling she had, but one she kept stuffed deep inside herself. This day was about her son - the son who came galloping into the room with his arms in the air, his father hot on his trail. Blue tufts of hair flew about as he raced around the table and made a U-turn for the living room once again. Gajeel stopped to appraise Levy with a calm but disconcerting look.

"You're gonna wanna see this for yourself," he said. "Yer not gonna believe me otherwise."

Lucy helped Levy out of her seat and the two of them followed behind Gajeel, with Wendy and Juvia close on their heels. They wandered through the living room and out into a room at the end of the hallway, where the nursery had been freshly decorated for the twins arrival. Amaya stood wailing into her father's chest, her dark hair all but vanishing against Gray's thick, black hoodie. He cradle her tight against him, but looked ashen as he stared at the wall to the right of the doorway.

Levy came to a staggering halt in the centre of the room when she noticed it - the gaping hole in the wall. She shared a look with Gajeel, who in turn glanced towards Lucy, who'd known about the hole in the shared wall of their apartments. They shared in a moment of nostalgia - and quiet worry.

Lucy cracked out laughing so hard she almost knocked Levy to the ground. Wendy stood in shocked silence while Juvia squeezed her way through the knot of people towards her crying daughter, who relinquished her sobs just long enough to squeak a sorry.

"How in the world did a little thing like her do something like this?" Wendy asked.

Daichi stood in the connecting room on the other side, the empty bedroom they'd been saving for guests. He stared through the hole at Amaya and smiled in an infectious sort of manner. Amaya smiled back at him, her blue eyes sparkling with the rivulet of tears trickling down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them away to shed herself the embarrassment - and the guilt.

"They're bound by destiny," Juvia gasped. "The hole has returned to grant our children the purest of love!"

Gajeel stared at the hole in defeat. "You've gotta be kiddin' me."

"You can fix it," Lucy commented. "Just like you could've fixed the other one."

Levy shot Lucy a cool but embarrassed look. She'd told her that in confidence. But, well, twelve years had passed since then. She supposed it was time to stop holding onto secrets.

"Let's just cover it with a photograph for now," Lucy went on. "You don't have time to be fixing holes when you have babies on the way."

Levy felt disorientated. She couldn't remember the last time she'd stood up for so long. Gajeel was always forcing her into one seat or another.

"Hey, what's going on?" Natsu asked from the doorway, ushering both his children into the room.

"I can see Daichi!" Fay exclaimed.

"What's he doing in that hole?" Nysa asked. "Is he in trouble?"

Gray and Gajeel both did their best to stifle a laugh.

"We were playing Fairy Tail," Daichi said.

"Yeah," Amaya insisted. "'Maya's ice magic broked the wall."

"She must take after her father," Juvia praised. "My big, strong girl."

"So, um, who wants cake?" Wendy asked, trying, as always, to make things seem a little better.

"Uh, guys, I think cake will have to wait," Gray said.

The group turned towards Levy, who now stood in a puddle of water. The shock of their concerned faces brought her attention to the odd sensation running down her legs, and the sudden throb of a familiar, lingering pain that jolted both hands to her belly. The room was suddenly spinning.

Looked like the guild was about to get two more members.

* * *

 **Just wanted to thank those of you who have shown interest in my future fanfiction! Here's a list of meanings for all the children featured in this little epilogue! :)**

 **Daichi:** From Japanese _大 (dai)_ meaning "big, great" combined with _地 (chi)_ meaning "earth, land" or _智 (chi)_ meaning "wisdom, intellect". Other kanji combinations are possible.

 **Amaya:** Night Rain.

 **Nysa:** The Nysa or Nysian asteroids are a group of asteroids in the asteroid belt orbiting the Sun between 2.41 and 2.5 AU.

 **Fay:** Fairy.


End file.
